Experiences - Heroin (Diacetylmorphine) experiences

[KyleEleven37]

im going to get high, i cant stand reading all this shit without a hit peace

[Lisa J]

SWIM was also clean from heroin for 10 years but a major emotional upset caused her to go straight back on it, and despite having a fentanyl prescription, does mixing the two now mean SWIM is actually using China White?. SWIM got started on heroin when she was 16 when a friend banged her up with it, SWIM had used a little dope before that but nothing stronger, SWIM really liked gear and either chased or banged it up on and off until she was 29 when she moved in with husband. The longest SWIM was clean in that period was 2 years, SWIM thought her love affair with the gear was over but now she realises it never will be. SWIM'S advice is that heroin should be treated with great respect and only ever try it if you are feeling strong and don't use regularly, if you have any problems at all, leave it alone because it will take your troubles away, to start with, until it becomes THE problem.

[DeadlySiner]

SWIM's first experience with Heroin was great, SWIM snorted a tenth of a gram at first to test how he would react and felt extremely calmed and relaxed. So SWIM and his friend thought it would be alright to do a little more. After a quarter gram or so total SWIM was in a sort of trance. When SWIM closed his eyes he was in a dreamworld that SWIM could have sworn was reality until SWIM's friend woke him up. SWIM then hurled, but it was relieving and made SWIM feel even better. This feeling lasted 4 or 5 hours until SWIM went to sleep. SWIM did H probably...5 more times but could never reach the same state as the first time even after stronger doses so he pretty much gave up on it. He wonders if someone else has had this problem, and been able to solve it without going to more direct means of administration.

[JaWill88]

SWIM's first experience with heroin was snorting it. SWIM did probably .1 and felt awesome. by the way that is tar. SWIM has never even seen powder in front of him. SWIM lives in Washington and thats usually all that is around. SWIM only snorted it for like a month. then came the big bang. SWIM's friend put about .2 to .25 in a spoon, cooked it up, and shoved that rig into SWIM's arm and... blast off. SWIM tasted it. then SWIM got this feeling like all his limbs were heavy. he felt it in his gut first and then spread throughout all his limbs. then his head got really heavy and then there was an explosion of endorphins. his ears started to ring and it felt like an orgasm spreading through out his body. everything was numb and warm. his head felt really good. he had never been so relaxed and happy. he could barely walk and get out to the car. this rush lasted 3-5 minutes. then came the regular high that came from snorting it. for about a year after that SWIM kept doin it a couple times a month. no big deal. then swim moved out of his parents house, got a good job, and all that other stuff. thats when swim experienced that bad side. SWIM had too much money and a low enough tolerance to allow him to have a whole lot. SWIM did it like 5 times a day for maybe three weeks. when SWIM ran out he went through HELL. when he woke up after his last shot from the night before he was ok for an hour or two. then came the restlessness. then his body started to get drenched in sweat. then his legs felt like they were being stretched unhumanly far and then being compressed back together. SWIM could not get comfterable and had to change his clothes every 20 min because they were drenched in sweat. then his stomach ached like never before and could not eat. then came the puking. pretty much just water/liquid from no food. then he shit out his insides. swim felt like his intestines and stomach were going to come out of his ass. SWIM only allowed this for about a day and a half and got some dope. INSTANTLY BETTER. oh yeah when SWIM is sick his pupils get huge too and vision is blurred. anyway... SWIM continued on staying well all day for about a year or two. swim lost his job, car, home, contact with family, everything. swim finally started to do what male junkies do... rob homes, cars, hook people up, rip people off, con, whatever... EVERY DAY. it was just terrible. SWIM finally got on suboxone and has never been better. SWIM has still had a bit of a problem with shootin coke, but thats comin to and end to. heroin WILL fuck up your life. it just takes more time for some people than it does for others. for some its months, for some its years.

[toighttoiger]

just to provide a non depressing response in this thread:

i'm nodding right now. i've only snorted it, but i'll shoot it soon because i recently acquired a clean needle from a junkie when she bought some. it's pretty nice, but honestly, i don't think it's that much better than the pills that i've tried (hydrocodone, darvocet). maybe i'm not doing enough or i just prefer pills. but it is a lot cheaper, and always, always available which does make it better. the only thing bad about it, is that it shows up on drug tests, whereas hydro and oxy and whatnot don't.

[T0nner]

SWIM's best friend has an uncle who used to be on H, and his reason for it?

"at the time i took a look at life and thought, i can work 5 days a week and have 2 days to myself or i can drop out of society with my close friends, not have a care in the world and just enjoy life as it is, i don't like the 2.4 children factor of how life should be."

The guys quit now of course, but he said of it,

"the only users who cause problems are the people who are irresponsible and the people who have to turn to crime to afford it."

If theres one thing Swims learnt from the guy it's that people are quick to judge H users as bad people and if they knew the reason most of them are there in the first place, would offer more help than show disgust.

Reputation Comments on this post:

Thanks for sharing the insights

[oldbulllee]

i didn't visit for some time.
managed to cut my habit down.1 gr a month approx. no real withdrawals anymore, but longing is still there. heroin is really a love/hate thing.

[engagenirvana]

Swim is happy to say that heroin is no longer in his life. Swim loves everything about Heroin but the fact that it is very addicting and very hard to stop is why swim decided to stop. Swim went through his entire savings of $1000 in a one month period of using almost everyday and usually more than once a day.

This is a very powerful and potent drug and should be handled with care and respect if you should choose to use it. Don't underestimate the addictive nature of this drug for that is what swim did and it fucked him over. Please be careful with use and try to limit use to once in a while for it will take over with its addiction if you let it get out of hand. Respect this drug. I cannot emphasize that point more. You HAVE to respect it.

[oldbulllee]

swims relationship with H is your typical love/hate thing. for a reason. right now it's more in the hate part, as swim is a bit high, not much, not close to a nod, swim has taken his last little bit, 3 cm line. no more today, or any time soon, as swim has no more money. he all ready spent more than he can afford this month on it. tomorrow he will love it. but right now, he hates it. and himself.

[samuraigecko]

SWIM has snorted it, blasted it, dropped it, sold it, jumped on it and even put it in his eye once "just for laughs". SWIM did this for about a year on and off. Made no difference to SWIM weather or not he had it. SWIM never found any discomfort except for a little aching in the legs. After that year or so SWIM has stayed clean, He just decided not to do it anymore and that was that. SWIM didn't go on any methadone or any "withdrawal" opiate to try and cut down gradually. It was just a decision he made. SWIM makes alot of money and would have had the potential to ride the road others have mentioned but for some reason that never happened to him.
SWIM never lost his job or his friends or family and he never stole or cheated (though he knows people who did) because he didn't need to, he was already financially stable so I guess he is lucky in that way.

This is NOT to say that one cannot end up in that bad position, and it IS true that the MAJORITY of the MAJORITY will end up in that bad position. SWIM considers himself to be a rare case and very lucky.


Just Ones input, nothing more. One has no place judging anyone, nor does he.

[mr.mackey]

SWIM thought he'd share his first experience with heroin. SWIM and his best friend acquired 2 "blows" from a trusted source and went back to SWIM's house. they dumped the contents of each bag onto SWIM's trusty mirror and cut two lines. immediately after snorting his line SWIM felt distant and relaxed. this quickly built into waves of orgasmic euphoria all over SWIMs body as he lay on the floor of his living room. SWIM and his friend both said the experience could only be described as complete nothingness; LSD makes SWIM feel EVERYTHING and yet the total lack of any and everything is somehow just as holy..needless to say they had a good time and look forward to slamming it.

[Ellis D.]

I think some drug users take drugs to hide from their reality but I think theyre are also just curious feel good junkies and people looking for easy adventure who tend to end up in the drug rut.

Smack is a weird drug, SWIM actually had much more euphoria from SWIMS first hydrocodone dose than SWIMs first H dose. It seems to just get you addicted really fast until you can't afford to get high off the shit and you're going through withdrawls every few weeks inbetween squermaging any dope you can get your hands on...

Drugs are bad mmmmkay.?...

[Ellis D.]

Go to college, fuck a bunch of (clean) bitches, get a good degree, and you will at least end up with a good enough job to support a habbit

[trueNorth]

...?Swim had a 2 month jones which is really nothing compared to what some people have done. However Swim assures me that the withdrawl was not pretty. However not everyone becomes corrupt as the reason Swim quit was because she ran out of her own personal savings; Swim did not steal, beg, borrow or ho' for the powder.

[greenapple]

swim's experience with heroin was short and sweet but left a lasting taste in her mouth. swim hasn't used heroin for 7 years...

swim started iv-ing and her first dose was way too much, almost needed to call the ambulance for some narcan but luckily that didnt eventuate. swim had about 4 shots every weekend for approximately 3 months and of course found that during the week she was a mess. at first withdrawals were nothing, didnt even feel sick but after a few weekends of constant use and an increasing tolerance, she starts getting the aches, sleeplessness and depression.

swim can't remember how much she was taking as a friend-of-swim's was preparing everything. swim ended up quitting her job after two weeks of using, hocking all her belongings (and some of her family's) and spending everyday trying to get on.

once swim's friend went into a rapid detox (which is a story for another thread) she had to get clean. she didn't go to detox, instead visited the doctor for help sleeping and was prescribed normison. she was incredibly depressed and anxious for a few weeks, had the normal withdrawal symptoms of aches and pains, nausea, flu like symptoms for about two weeks. one thing swim remembers is that the taste of the gear stayed in her mouth long after she stopped using and long after the withdrawal symptoms were gone. it took about 3 months for the taste to finally go.

swim remembers it being the best euphoric feeling of her life, but feels incredibly lucky to have not done it too long. it made all her problems disappear and she didnt have a care in the world. it was like being wrapped in cotton wool. that being said, it is VERY addictive to some people and swim liked it too much. swim says to exercise caution when deciding to experiement with heroin, read up on other people's experience and use common sense. swim was lucky she didn't loose more than a few months of her life.

be safe y'all!

peace.

[raven3davis]

SWIMS experience with heroin.

SWIM first tried heroin and snorted it like most everyone else. SWIM loved black tar. The people he had to go through were strung out so he tried it twice and didnt touch it for another 2 years...mainly because it was too hard to find.

Fast forward 2 years and SWIM is in love with hydromorphone (IV), oxycodone, hydromorphone, morphine...what do ya know SWIM gets a connection for black tar heroin. First he binged on heroin for 3 days. It was black tar mixed with some inert powder making it easy to snort. The third day SWIM took one shot to try it out. SWIM quit and felt like shit for a few days.....these were probably some of the worse withdrawals he had.


SWIM isnt sure if anyone else experiences this but black tar burns so bad for SWIM to snort. Worse than MDMA, xtc and any research chemical swim has snorted including 2c-e.

Okay so snorting this stuff isnt the best idea....SWIM found out if you plug .2g you get that nice rush w/o the hassle of snorting the monkey juice. Throughout SWIMs use he only injected black tar about ~10 times. Its just to dirty for SWIM to shoot. On top of that SWIM doesnt get the amazing rush he gets with other opiates. That's why SWIM just plugged it.

Next was SWIMs china white phase.....again, he only shot it a few times, he preferred to snort it or smoke it. For 2 months SWIM was high on either heroin or oxycodone. One thing led to another and eventually SWIM became physically and mentally dependent on opiates. Fortunately SWIM had a pretty hefty supply of OC 80s, roxicodone, hydrocodone, and percocet so everything for tapering off opiates was available to him. SWIM could go a day without using opiates, it was two days in a row that gave him the problems. The withdrawals didnt kick in for 48 hours usually for SWIM. When they kicked in SWIM snorted 15mg roxicodone to combat the illness. If SWIM wanted to get high he generally just snorted or plugged more oxycodone. Eventually SWIM just started taking 10mg percocets orally. SWIM was able to free his body of addiction within a month. That's SWIMS story. Coming off of opiates is a lot easier if you have something to taper with. SWIM had opiates in all shapes and sizes so he was able to slowly taper off eventually just taking a few hydrocodone per day. Doing opiates isnt even fun when you have such a high tolerance. You dont even get high, you just stabilize yourself and minimize the pain.

SWIM has done heroin since then but he doesn't see it becoming a problem like that again. SWIM loves opiates and will always use them in moderation. SWIM just never got off to IV diacetlymorphine for some reason. It felt good but SWIM was never overpowered by the rush. SWIM isnt here to preach to anyone but opiates are not to be taken lightly. SWIM never had an addictive personality but opiates did get a hold of him for a little while.

[bjarkii]

SWIM started doing H about the same time he joined this forum. he found a random scaghead at like midday and asked him out of the blue if he could get SWIM some smack. after some initial confusion, i ended up with 4 bags of very very very nice H (this guy turned out to have been dealing H for 20 years and had some killer contacts) he could have ripped me off so easily but he didnt, so i sorted him out with some weed (he had quit smack the week before) anyway, so far i've only railed it, but i've done so 5 or 6 times. when you're life is looking completely shit, the choice between railing some cheap powder thats going to take away all of your problems, or sitting there being depressed is an easy one to make. if you have a hole in your life, heroin will fill it very nicely, and although you may start out moderating your use quite well, if something goes wrong in your life it's just so easy to say "fuck it" and just get high.

[jerbles]

swim hates feeling like a statistic, but his story is pretty much the norm. swim started smoking weed when he was 14, and when he was 15, he weed dealer introduced him to a little something called china white. he had tried brown (tar mixed with dormin) about a month before to no effect, but swim's "friend" had pretty much ripped him off on that. He bought two capsules for 20 bucks and dumped them both out, thinking he would need both of them as the brown hadn't done anything for him. boy was he mistaken. It was a chunky/fluffy off-white (tannish) color. He railed both caps in two lines.
before this incident, the first opiate swim had done was a 5mg methadone which was snorted, then hydrocodone, codiene and opium, so swim had experienced the (mild) sense of wellbeing opiates gave. but china white was like what crack is to cocaine multiplied by 100.
needless to say, he was floored. he had fallen into the depths of dreamland, sitting at his dealers house (swim was 15 and this guy was like 29, so swim thought he was really cool), and this was just the most WONDERFUL experience he has ever had, even to this date. Swim would awake from his nods once in awhile, to look over and see this guy nodded out as well, so swim just let the nods come.
After about an hour, the effects weren't as intense, and swim sat up off the couch and the nausea hit him hard. He ran to the shitter and puked for a good five minutes, and after he was done, he didn't "feel even better" like most people say, but it was like the nausea consumed him, and the high was definately still there, but it had turned into a sick high.
A few weeks after this, swim's parents got in a big fight (well, swims dad said that he was gonna shoot her and kids) and swims mom went to stay at her aunts, and had his sister take me to stay at her boyfriends. The whole ordeal had swim all worked up, and the first thing swim thought of was the china white, so he went and got two more caps. He again did them both, not caring about the nausea and just wanting that same euphoric rush, and went to sleep. He would have been better off puking that night, as when he woke up he immediately yakked and continued to the rest of the day, and the next morning even.
Well, I could go on and on and on, but let's just say six years later, swim has been injecting china white daily since those events, stopping only for two months (jail and rehab). It's just incredible how intense that first time was, and everything after that has been sort of chasing that, and even mainlining doesn't give the desired effect. Really not a very exciting story, but you know. Story of my life

[dna_1977]

SWIM's first experience with H was in late 1996. SWIM's method of choice has always been chasing the dragon. SWIM tried snorting for some times when he was living in Germany for about 2 years (1998/1999) just because in Germany he couldn't always find smack that was suitable for smoking, but SWIM didn't really like snorting. Actually snorting H made SWIM wonder where all that snorted H went to because he felt nothing from it. In Portugal nobody snorts H, either people inject it or smoke it. That is so true that SWIM only heard of the snorting H possibility when he moved to Germany.

Anyway, these 11 years can be divided into two different periods: the first one from 1996 to 2001(December 2001 actually) in which SWIM developed a daily habit that made him go through all kind of unimaginable experiences that would require at least 50 pages to be described and still wouldn't be enough; the 2nd period, after a 4 and a half years break started on June 2006 until now again...everything is back...a full-time job, withdrawals, lying, not really giving a sh*t about anything else and thinking every day that "tomorrow morning I won't do it and I will instead start taking the subutex" that lies in the drawer since months waiting for SWIM's decision....

SWIM's biggest problem is that, unlike many of the guys posting here, he gets every single day that greatly rewarding warm feeling like the smoothest God's blanket covering him, specially in the morning after a long night of sleep, when he wakes up feeling all kind of ache from his toes to the top of his head.....smoking about 10 to 15 lines up and down on that tin foil make him just feel brand new again: ready to face another day's tasks.

carpe diem

[samuraigecko]

I guess that may be another reason why people call it "chasing" the dragon . . . cos ppl tend to "chase" that feeling they first had (which doesnt exist = dragon). Another way to interpretation of an old saying one guesses. Even though ppl tend to use it for smoking rather than blasting one guesses that it may apply to other situations also.

[jerbles]

haha... yeah, that's cool

[stelfton15]

SWIM has been smoking black tar heroin for about a year now (started last Thanksgiving). SWIM got into it through his brother when SWIM visited him in LA; since SWIM has always loved opiates, he felt that heroin was just a natural progression for him. Frankly SWIM doesn't see what all the fuss is about; although SWIM has had his ups and downs, dealt with withdrawals and cravings, no one suspects the worst out of SWIM, and SWIM has done a lot of keep people from suspecting anything.

SWIM smokes black tar by hot knifing it. Specifically, SWIM:
1. sticks some on one end of a straightened out paper clip
2. take another straightened out paper clip and sticks it into a flame (preferably a blue flame)
3. heats the clip until it gets red hot, then presses it into the black tar on the other paper clip, effectively vaporizing it (SWIM then inhales the vapor through a straw)

It's the method SWIM picked up while in LA, and is probably the most effective method.

Why does SWIM smoke? Partly because SWIM loves the feeling, but mostly it's for the experience... almost "just because". SWIM also wants to prove to himself and to others that just because someone does heroin, it doesn't turn them into a junkie... SWIM wants to shock people later on down the road when SWIM brings up his heroin experience. What keeps SWIM buying on a regular basis is the realization that heroin makes the difference between a good and bad day; having it gives him a reason to get up every day, not having it means pain and misery. What a trap SWIM has gotten himself into!

SWIM plans on quitting at some point... he has been getting bored with it lately but it's always around. SWIM knows he can quit any time he wants to, he just doesn't want to now.

[dna_1977]

"SWIM knows he can quit any time he wants to, he just doesn't want to now."....

Well stelfton15, actually I'm not that sure things are gonna be quite as you think they will...no one plays with king heroin...and the ones who say they do, they are sooner or later gonna realize how things are in reality...and they are not nice! I mean things are actually great, but not when one quits...

Just yesterday SWIM planned to stop smoking smack starting this morning and...about 3 hours after waking up, when things started to get pretty bad, bones and muscles aching, tearing, "runny nose", yawning non stop , (...), there was SWIM holding another asian heroin nº3 bag in one hand and a lighter and a tin foil in the other hand...going to the slums and getting a couple of baggies wasn't to much trouble and didn't take long neither; all this to tell you that it was in less than a lamb's tail shake that SWIM changed his mind about stopping scag today when things started to get hard and all he could think about was getting some stuff to feel fine again...

So my advice (well actually I don't really feel very comfortable in naming it "advice" cos who am I to give advices afterall?...) is people should not undervalue the fact that one does not just come off smack so easily whenever that decision is taken...and believe it the less one underestimates that fact, the stronger one will be to face that situation.

Let's see how SWIM does tomorrow morning...all it's needed is to hold (extreme) disconfort for some hours so the first subutex can be taken. It's all in one's mind...

Confessions of a portuguese heroin smoker...

Peace,
dna

[Psych0naut]

It has been 4 or so months ago since SWIM last did any heroin, which was his first time as well. Now he has got a new connection, which supplies him with top notch stuff, very pure no. 3 heroin, which is the freebase, meant for smoking. A great idea popped into his mind. Normally he smokes it on foil, but a lot of smoke get's lost, and a bit of heroin get's burned and destroyed, so it's not very economical. Suddenly the idea of vaporising it in his cannabis vaporiser, which is basically a lightbulb type vaporiser, popped up. SWIM put a few small lumps of heroin in his vaporiser and gave his idea a trial test, here is his experience.


T 21:37 SWIM takes 2 tokes in a time span of 1 minute. Before he even exhales, he already start to feel the heroin coming up. Because he smokes it in his vaporiser instead of on foil, it vaporises much slower, because of the thick glass that has to heat up. The big advantage though, is that SWIM is losing zero percent heroin, nothing get's burned or escapes in the air.

T 21:39 SWIM takes a monster toke, inhaling as much smoke as possible, and holds it in for a while. Just a few seconds after he blows out, something very strong grows in his body, the heroin is hitting hard. It's like getting run over by a freighttrain of nothingness

T 21:41 SWIM takes a second monster toke, and again, just when he exhales he feels another flood of endorphines in his brain. The rush is already starting to come on, though it isn't very intense yet, it's very pleasant indeed.

T 21:43 SWIM takes a third monsterous toke, and yet again, he feels a new wave of even more endorphines being released in his brain, increasing the rush, and adding to the euphoria, sedation and the body glow.

T 21:45 SWIM takes a fourth and final humongous hit, the wave of endorphines rushing through his brain have now transformed into a tsunami of endorphines. His body is glowing up like a lightbulb, a very pleasant sensation. His body is numb like it's been injected with lidocaine. He feels total relaxation, and feels comfortably numb.

T 21:47 The beast that is heroin is still rapidly growing in strength, but getting close to the peak. He feels incredibly stoned, but the stonedness is lacking any negative effects of a cannabis high. No paranoia, and much more euphoria. No care in the world. His whole body is numb, and he is dissociated from the world, not like with DXM or ketamine, but like with all other strong opioids, though heroin beats them all in comparisson. This is the drug that makes you lose every worry in the world, as long as you're just under it's influence. It gives a good insight into why addicts to it can loose everything they have, just to be under it's influence. It's powerfull and not to be underestimated.

T 21:55 SWIM is fully numb, no other opioid comes close to the body numbing effects of heroin. The body glow is now peaking, and the small initial rush is just over it's peak. For the oncoming hour SWIM will be enjoying a very nice body high. Total relaxation has settled in, and SWIM is content with just being here, he doesn't care about more right now.

T 22:00 The rush is practically over, but SWIM is now left with a cannabis high times ten. SWIM is obliterated, completely numb. His pupils are tiny, it's clearly visibly he took an opioid. Unfortunenately he is also feeling some nausea. SWIMs body is still glowing like the sun, not too extreme like he is almost burning, but just like he's sitting next to a radiator, or laying in bed under some soft, warm blankets. This has a very high comfort level.

T 22:05 Still so damn stoned, and from a really tiny bit, just a few crumbs of heroin. This is clearly very, very potent shit. The best thing is SWIM still has half of the intended dose left in his vaporiser, because it's so efficient, he only needs a third of what he usually would smoke. An excellent tip, always smoke heroin out of a bulb vaporiser!

T 22:10 SWIM just layed down on his bed for a few minutes, which gave him a good impression of what heaven must be like, so to speak. Even if he had to lay on a concrete floor, it would probaply have felt like velvet. Now he can understand why junkies don't care about having to sleep in the gutter, as long as they have their fix, they have no worries.

T 22:15 SWIM is nodding out. He leans with his head on the palm of his hand. He closes his eyes and it is a different world, almost a bit like ketamine. Unfortunenately SWIM is still feeling pretty nauseous. That's one of the sacrefices one has to make for using H. Along with possible addiction and other nasties.

T 22:20 Time dilation is enormous, it almost seems like time has frozen, a minute feels like an hour. Typing this first sentence took 3 minutes, can you imagine. SWIM is happy he is at home, cause having to walk or cycle back to home is impossible right now, way to tired and uncoordinated.

T 22:30 SWIM is still completely numb, both physically and mentally. He knows the lather is a reason why it is very addictive, but SWIM is pretty down to earth regarding this, he is in a emotional stable period, otherwise he wouldn't have taken it. SWIM is a bit crosseyed as well, his vision is a bit blurry.

T 22:40 SWIM is already starting to come down, though he is still pretty numb, and he still feels a bit of a warm glow inside his body. The nausea is also subsiding, which he is very glad with. He is still feeling very relaxed, and his lifted mood will stick with him into the next day, he knows from experience.

T 22:50 The nausea has disappeared, leaving him with a very pleasant afterglow of some last endorphines flowing around. He knows from previous experiences it will be another hour or so before he is completely at baseline, in the mean time, he'll still be feeling some residual effects, and a very nice moodlift.

T 23:05 SWIM is still feeling some residual body glow and a little bit of numbness, but his mind is completely clear again. Even though it will take another hour of more before SWIM is fully at baseline, all the main effects have almost completely subsided, so he is making an end on this experience. Goodnight.

Reputation Comments on this post:

excellent experience report

[jerbles]

What keeps SWIM buying on a regular basis is the realization that heroin makes the difference between a good and bad day; having it gives him a reason to get up every day, not having it means pain and misery.

this is EXACTLY how Swij feels. If he wakes up with no dope, besides having terrible withdrawals, he feels like there is no point in getting out of bed, other than trying to score.

Well stelfton15, actually I'm not that sure things are gonna be quite as you think they will...no one plays with king heroin...and the ones who say they do, they are sooner or later gonna realize how things are in reality...and they are not nice! I mean things are actually great, but not when one quits...

I was gonna say the same thing. swiy just doesn't understand.