Experiences - Heroin (Diacetylmorphine) experiences

[sistrmorphine17]

umm as young as i am (17) my exspeciance with drugs, exspecailly dope, of any kind it often makes me wonder why it took me so young. i started when i was liek 12 and i cant give it up. ive been in and out and in and out of detoxs rehabs grouphomes jail, you name it...ive done it. but like someone once told me "Reality is a crutch for people who can't handle drugs" and i firmly beleive that.

[InFlames]

This is such a bad way to look at drugs. Drugs can be amazing and eye opening, but only when treated with the respect they deserve. My best friend killed himself on accident while on lsd, but he took 5 hits of very strong acid by himself. My dads brother died because of hepatitis because he shared a dirty heroin needle, he was a junky and did not use good judgment. When you take a good thing and abuse it, you will in return be abused.

Drugs are a crutch for drug addicts who can't handle reality. But drugs that are used with respect can increase the joy reality brings.

I know this is a drug forum but your post was by far the most disturbing thing i read. And i think it goes against everything this forum stands for.

please don't take this response as a insult, think of it as constructive criticism.

InFlames added 4 Minutes and 10 Seconds later...

Sorry to post under myself, but I thought i was at the last post when i made a comment on a certain post, and after looking at where his post was located it was no where near mine.

This is the post that i am referring to in my above post.

sistrmorphine17
Newbie
Join Date: 22-11-2005
Location: United States
Posts: 6

umm as young as i am (17) my exspeciance with drugs, exspecailly dope, of any kind it often makes me wonder why it took me so young. i started when i was liek 12 and i cant give it up. ive been in and out and in and out of detoxs rehabs grouphomes jail, you name it...ive done it. but like someone once told me "Reality is a crutch for people who can't handle drugs" and i firmly beleive that.

[d-outcast]

this last month I ve been obsessed with the idea of trying smack..but somany of my friends have scolded the idea!


they say it makes you far more distinct to society...and become worse in the context of socialisation

[xtiml]

allways you pay to play with it. if not overdosing then kicking or tolerance. the psychic benefits are to small to reward. when you are kicking would you sell your mother to get some/ sell out your wife/ friend steal from fuck people over?heroin is best for physical pain. if it is psychic pain you use it for there are othrre less tragic drugs. better to smoke opium and do it with a little awareness of the complixcations. besides when shooting shit in beginning its a puke session so what s up?

[mickenator]

SWIM has been a constant heroin user since 1990 apart from the 2.5 years SWIM did in jail, and once you start using even recreationaly it won't be long before addiction comes knocking at your door and like SWIM and thousands of addicts you will LOOSE EVERYTHING, but since SWIM got out of jail SWIM has thankfully been able to keep that monster from rearing its ugly head. For how long I don't know as even now SWIMs back to using infrequently.

SWIM was a heroin addict for just over one year, from 1998 until 1999. SWIM was about 23 years old, and had just started to work in a factory. SWIM had never done much drugs up to this point, always having been wary. SWIM had smoked hash, taken some ecstacy, that kind of thing, but when SWIM met this guy SWIM2, things took a dramatic turn in SWIM's life. SWIM was also listening alot to Dog Man Star, which probably played a subconcious role goading on SWIM's already curious nature about substances.
So SWIM was getting to know this chap well, when another lad came up to SWIM one day and said, "You do know SWIM2's a junkie, don't you?" big grin on this idiots face. SWIM answered: "I like to make my own mind up about people"
Time passed and SWIM did indeed find out that this guy was a user. Swim talked to him quite a bit about how long he was doing it, what it felt like, until one day SWIM asked SWIM2 could he go to his and try it. SWIM2 was cautioning against it, saying are you sure? SWIM said he was sure. So one fine day after work SWIM went to where SWIM2 lived, not too far from the factory. SWIM2 stayed in the middle of a run down council estate whereas SWIM lived in middle class suburbia. They go up to SWIM2's room, a small affair with a battered stereo lying on the floor. SWIM notices a funny smell in the room, not a bad smell, just different. SWIM lights up a cigarette and watches SWIM2 at work. He takes out his kit and spreads the various components onto the dresser. The blackened spoon rests there, some water and some citric. He has a Zippo lighter too, along with a couple of barrels. He opens the small brown bag of heroin and spills the powder into the spoon. He pours in the citric and adds some water from the syringe. He mixes this solution well, then lights the Zippo and leaves it standing. He moves the spoon over the flame, saying "You have to wait, wait 'til it changes colour" and that is where SWIM remembers that song by The Stranglers, called Golden Brown. They play this song in supermarkets he thinks. The golden brown liquid is steaming hot now, SWIM2 bites the end out of a cigarette and places this cotton into the middle of the spoon. He places another barrel on top of the cotton, and draws the mixture up through it, providing a filter of sorts. He adds the needle and pushes the liquid up to the top, tapping it in case of air bubbles. Now we wait for it to cool, and SWIM2 rolls up SWIM's sleeve and has a look. "Good ropes" he says, as SWIM has always had prominent veins. SWIM2 places a tourniquet round, then turns SWIM's arm front facing, as SWIM has a thing about that big pumper in the elbow junction. A meduim one on the forearm will do fine. SWIM2 cleans the area to be penetrated with a Steret alcohol wipe, and now he returns to the needle and splits the stuff with another barrel. "You won't need much for your first time" SWIM2 intones. SWIM nods nervously, his heart rate has picked up, and he is also feeling some panic. SWIM holds it down though, he does want to try this.
"I'll give you 8mls in this one, should be enough" SWIM2 says. He taps the barrel for air bubbles. The vein is prominent. "Just relax, don't worry" he says, before pushing the needle into SWIM's vein. There is a faint sting and SWIM can feel it 'pop' into the vein quite clearly. SWIM watches in horrid fascination, as SWIM2 draws SWIM's blood into the barrel with the stuff. The golden brown swirls around with the red blood cells, before SWIM2 gently begins to ease the stuff into SWIM's body. SWIM immediately can taste the gear in his mouth. As SWIM2 pushes more into SWIM's vein, SWIM gets the hit so hard, it is like a god damn freight train, the gear rushes straight to SWIM's head, he feels incredibly high. So high that SWIM doesn't even feel the needle coming back out, or the wipe over the wound, all he feels is euphoria, falling back onto the bed, lying in his own private ecstacy. The initial hit was overwhelming for SWIM, and it lasted a good hour. The next hour not quite as intense, but still very high, kept nodding off, 'goofing' as they call it here. SWIM was still fucked about eight hours later, movement not very coordinated, speech slurred, similar in fact to being drunk. SWIM can't piss the whole time he is high, and once home he is sick a little in the bathroom, but it feels pleasant.

SWIM went on to do this drug every weekend and sometimes during the week. He used it to come down off pills. He then got greedy one time. HIs friends, the good ones, we're horrified, angry, tried to reach out and help but couldn't. SWIM did a little too much one night. Last thing he remembers is laughing and joking, then the void. SWIM was out for 10-15 minutes, nearly died. SWIM came to being violently shaken by SWIM2. SWIM can't remember his name. An ambulance with police escort is coming into the estate we are in. We flee. SWIM is on the beach later, in the dark, crying and puking, calling for his mother, just wanting the sickness and pain to go away. Funny thing is, even with the OD, SWIM didn't stop for another wee while. But he did learn that you can come so close to losing everything you hold dear, and he has not done it in 7 years.
SWIM does think about it sometimes, but SWIM is not into suppresants anymore. SWIM got HEP C from this lifestyle, and has just finished a successful course of treatment which was nice. This course is similar to Chemotherapy, so be warned all of you who wish to partake in the heroin lifestyle. SWIM thinks that due to the impurities inherent in this street drug, he would only ever do pure opium, but never again something with so many health risks attached. LSD is SWIM's drug of choice now, explore the mind, not kill your soul.

[mickenator]

Swibadgermeat after reading your tail it sounds so much like how swim got into gear. Swim also contracted Hep C and is being monitored, unlike swiy swim has been unable to stay totally free form this evil substance. But swim is pleased al has turned out well for swiy.

depends on what type one gets alright, SWIM went through a crazy six months which in some ways was the best six months of his life, but it drove him to the brink of despair. SWIM hopes that you succeed in if not curing it, but learning to live with the bastard. Good luck....

[genaro]

swim tried it only once in his life, to see how it was like. swim snorted a rail of white heroin (not the brown one which is bad quality), swim couldn't say how many milligrams that was.
Surprisingly, swim had almost no nausea for this first time, very relaxing and great well beeing (laying down in the woods, looking at the sky)
...all possible personal problems were gone (meaning they are still in your mind but you don't fucking care cause things feel just good and there's nothing to worry about).
So swim had seen how was heroin, and that was enough for him, his curiosity beeing satisfied.
Swim never tried it ever again as swim felt like this was something he could appreciate a bit too much and end up doing too often, swim think this one is a pernicious drug as it doesn't sound bad the first time you do it (i.e. it doesn't sound dangerous) but all the friends of swim who've been doing some occasionally said to swim that he had a right feeling about it: heroin is very dangerous as it's very difficult to keep your consumption rate under control (very easy and tempting to overdo it, meaning using it weekly ending up hooked on it)...not to speak of heroin addicts opinion which all say that this stuff is the worst pernicious shit ever (it sounds like this is the last thing you wanna find yourself addicted to, crack beeing the close second).

ps: if you wanna try it once to see how it is, just ensure there's no one you know that could get you some, this way you won't be too tempted to get some after your first time. Of course, do not try it if you're in a bad period of your life with lots of personal problems or psychological distress.

Reputation Comments on this post:

	Very True.
	Good information. Top post

[theknocker]

Swim has been clean from H now for 10yrs. My experiences with this drug are from "Chasing the Dragon".Swim has only ever smoked H. But don’t be fooled thinking you wont get hooked if you only smoke it. Swim started off taking H to come down off E once every wknd. Gradually started just taking H because it made swim feel so good. Had some wonderful out off body trips along with not having a care in the world. Soon swim progressed to smoking midweek and not long after "every day". Swim would smoke about 1/2gram daily. Swim did manage to hold down a good job even though he was throwing up all the time, would break in to cold sweats and had a very short attention span. Swim would have to smoke morning, afternoon and evening to keep the sickness away. Swim also dropped from 14st down to 8st and did not look very healthy.Swim carried on like this for 5yrs until his first child came along and he decided to quit. Went cold turkey which was hell, but in the end got through it. Swim still dreams off the high and even thinks he can smell H burning sometimes. Don’t get swim wrong, he is glad he experienced this drug and all its effects (both good and bad). His advice is to keep away from this drug unless your prepared to lose it all (Friends, family and maybe even your life)

Reputation Comments on this post:

What a good post.

[Matt The Funk]

SWIM just smoked some tar. In total about .08-.1
He used a lightbulb vaporizer and smoked 2 tiny dabs of it.
It's sticky and black with a lighter color on the inside. Smells strongly og vinegar. Very sticky.
The hits taste kind of bad and there isn't much rush, but so far (20 min after first hit, about 8-10 total) he feels a similar feeling to 2 1/16hs of a patch of 75mcg fentanlly with no toelrance. Similar to a couple of hydros before the euphoria really kicks in (like 30-40mg)...
His body is relaxed and has that opiate warmth. His mind is spacey and content. Not as much euphoria but still a GOOD feeling overall. SWIM is getting kinda of bored righting this so he'll end it here.
Oh also SWIM is comfortably relaxed and ready for bed after a long hard day
It melts into a reddish liquid and smokes up and bubbles. The taste of vinegar is stronger than SWIM remembers....but it's been a while.

Reputation Comments on this post:

Good description and report

[engagenirvana]

My friend wrote down his last experiance on H and this is what he wrote. On 12-19-08. A little more than .3 grams. "Nothing felt on my head or anywhere else. The tool music I am listening to is euphoric. I can hardly write or think. I can't feel My head head at all and all worries are gone. My body is so warm znd feels like its in a giant heated blanket. Bluury vision and didcoloration and colors around me. The red line on the paper keeps moving . I can hardly write anymore after about 15 minutes after doing it up. The euphoria is incredible. I feel for one of the first times happy and content with life. My hand can't feel my hand. It's like its not even part of me. Someone else is writing and I watch what he observes from me. My chest and mid-section feel out of place with my body. My body feels. My head has turned into many things. Into a thought process center. I can feel the electrical signals going through my nerves but cant feel in the conventional sense. In all the drugs I've tried, this is the best. Touched by the power of the living and put into perspective of how life is and what I am. I am euphoria."
In short he really enjoyed it. It was his fifth time in a 6 day period he did it. He had smoked and snorted it but this experiance was through snorting. Smoking was a very pleasant experiance also for him. Hopefully he doesen't become an addict cause he's trying to cut back to once a week.

Reputation Comments on this post:

Thanks for sharing, and best of luck to the friend.

[bonghed]

Originally Posted by d-outcast

this last month I ve been obsessed with the idea of trying smack..but somany of my friends have scolded the idea!


they say it makes you far more distinct to society...and become worse in the context of socialisation

Well, the first time you try it, smoke it (i'd suggest) don't do much chase that dragon a cple timesand expect to yack a fair bit. someone who isn't me tried it a couple days ago, and again tonight. Personnally i know i could so easily be addicted(again that would be my fault not the drug's) , if you must try it than weigh things up,


Dose half a b was tar heroin (.1) chased the dragon, tasted very bitter i wouldn't say the smell was pleasent or the taste, but the effects certainly were.(successfully 2nd time missed loads of smoke 1st time). after the 4th line istarted throwing up violently, but really didn't care. After a spliff and sip of beer i had a few more.to describe it purely euphoric, slow warm fuzzy n shit for total experince lasted 8-10 hours last 4 of which were spent in the bath.


I had a experienced user with me btw which i highly advise if your gonna do it. Edited by: bonghed

[d-outcast]

thanks





I ve been considering it,..since it makes you hgihly dependent on it..and I dont have d money to do so

[deji]

I will tell you what heroin is like for SWIM - In his words:

Waking up at 8am and jumping out of bed and feeling the beginning of withdrawal. The night passed so fast and it is the next day already.

There is a huge snow storm and it takes at least 3 hours to get money by stealing and selling stuff. By this time the withdrawal is so intense I can barely drive. My friend has to take over.

We finally make it to the spot and get a few bags to take the sickness away.

Now we go back to stealing to get more money.

Later that night we cop again.

The next day arrives and it starts again.

I have risked getting arrested several times today. Stealing, and even getting caught buying the heroin is a crime.
I have also risked my life several times today. Going into the neighborhoods to get heroin, and also doing it.

I will give another scenerio.

Wake up in withdrawal.

This time I have money.

Pick up my friend.

We go to the projects to cop.

The police are running a sting that day and we get arrested just for being on the property. I got very lucky though, they didn't tow my car.

They end up arresting several hundred people that day. It takes 9 hours before I am released. I spend the whole day in withdrawal.

I had all the dope money on me, and the police end up keeping it for bond money. I am released before my friend, people without money get released later.

I get released with no money, sick as hell, and have to walk 30 minutes alone to my car through a terrible area.

I drive 45 min to my work to borrow money.
I drive 45 min back.

My friend is sitting outside.

We finally get heroin, my friend OD's.

That is what heroin is like. There is good days and bad days. You are just fighting to not be sick even on the best day possible. Then on a bad day you will be sick for so long and you ask yourself how did this happen. Your life will fall apart. Be careful everyone.

Reputation Comments on this post:

	Interesting Scenerios.
	Self Incrimintaion.

[Woodman]

deji,

From reading your story, it would seem that the worst problems from using drugs do NOT actually come from using them, but from what happens when police CATCH you with them, or (in your case) even suspect that you might be interested in using.

This is one reason why I truely believe that all drugs should be decrimilnalized.

[deji]

No.

I am showing how addictive it is. Most people that wake up at 8am and see a snow storm outside, they will just make a cup of hot chocolate and snuggle up back under the covers. Not a heroin addict.

Also, if you aren't addicted to herion and end up getting arrested for whatever, you will most likely sleep all day at the police station, get out and go home. The heroin addict will spend all day in pain sick, get let out only to be in a much worse situation than when they started the day. And if you get caught for something big, you're in for a hell of journey of going through the full withdrawal in jail.

But of course, if it wasn't illegal things would be different. But it is. Or if we had a million dollars or unlimited heroin, we would be ok. Most of us don't. So the situations I explained is the reality.

If you have never done heroin, stay that way. I have seen people alive and goofing around, and literaly die right in front of me from a OD. That is one of the craziest things to have to realize. The person that was just alive a couple hours ago, is now dead.

Just be careful is what I am trying to say. Try your best not to use it. And if you do, try your best not to become dependant on it. Its no fun. The high is only a few hours, the withdrawal is weeks, and the post withdrawal is months.

[smilla]

hey sistrmorphine...keep it the fight, because i can relate to you the same....it will be a struggle for the rest of your life but when you can wake up and not be sick, thats a DAMN good feeling....I was shooting heroin by the time i was 16 and snorting oxy's and dope well before that.....im 20 now and have been charged with multiple felonies, multiple jail times, and multiple years of probation....for what?!?!?!?! a high that lasts only a little while and ma ny broken relationships and loved ones.....in my opinion NOT FUCKIN WORTH IT!!!!

[raven3davis]

SWIM feels for the people with stories like this. He does agree that it would be better of legal so people wouldnt have to steal to get dope. Obviously people like that need help. SWIM knows how phsyically addictive heroin is but do most addicts or x additcs here believe that the current situation of your life had to do with much of the misery. First off if you had free dope you could spend your money on food or something healthy for your body. Treatment would be easier to get. How do people do this to themselves is what SWIM wants to know. Im sure you dont go into addiction thinking, im not going to get addicted to this, it just happens. Dont you see it coming though? Can't you see how bad it is messing up your life? Probably not, the heroin is probably doing all of your thinking.

SWIM cannot express how bad he feels for addicts, but heroin cannot make you do it. If you have the will power, you can do anything you want, including heroin. Think how your life would be without taking heroin everyday, mayber miserable still but you can turn your life around if you want to. There are people believe it or not who shoot dope once a month and never become additced. Heroin is an addictive drug but it can only do to you what you let it.

For anyone who is struggling, you can beat addiction. SWIM really has nowhere to talk because he has never experienced an addiction but he is telling you that you can do anything you put your mind to. You could say this instant that you will never take H again, and never do H again. SWIM cannot even imagine how hard this would be but its completely possible. SWIM was wondering though, how long do the withdrawls last for? Can a heroin addict ever recover fully from addiction, in the sence that they are not getting sick all the time. Surely they will think about heroin for the rest of their life, but heroin just does not have the ability to put its self inside of you. SWIM just wants to know how long the misery would last for. The pain and suffering would be miserable but well worth the rewards in the end. SWIM wont lie though, heroin is BOMB! No other opiate compares to it! The high is just so clean and so euphoric. Nothin matters at all. SWIM could definitely see how some would use it as an escape, and this is why he thought there might be a correlation between the current events in your life and addiction potential. Addiction can get anyone but it just seems that certain groups classes etc might be prone to addiction. I mean if your life sucks, you had a horrible child hood, just various factors probably make some people more prone to addiction.

For anyone out there who was or is addicted, what circumstances in your life led up to the addiction? Did your heroin start with recreational use or a tool to escape? SWIM would just like to know details of your first exposure and glimpse at addiction. Was there a small number of things causing it, large number, or did you just get addicted?

Good luck for anyone trying to win this fight. You can get help and and life can get much better. Hell this is a good place to hang if you just wanna chill and waste time, only thing is that it might remind you of heroin.

Reputation Comments on this post:

	good post
	Great post, very helpful and supportive. Thanks.

[San Diego]

Originally Posted by raven3davis

SWIM feels for the people with stories like this. He does agree that it would be better of legal so people wouldnt have to steal to get dope. Obviously people like that need help. SWIM knows how phsyically addictive heroin is but do most addicts or x additcs here believe that the current situation of your life had to do with much of the misery. First off if you had free dope you could spend your money on food or something healthy for your body. Treatment would be easier to get. How do people do this to themselves is what SWIM wants to know. Im sure you dont go into addiction thinking, im not going to get addicted to this, it just happens. Dont you see it coming though? Can't you see how bad it is messing up your life? Probably not, the heroin is probably doing all of your thinking.

SWIM cannot express how bad he feels for addicts, but heroin cannot make you do it. If you have the will power, you can do anything you want, including heroin. Think how your life would be without taking heroin everyday, mayber miserable still but you can turn your life around if you want to. There are people believe it or not who shoot dope once a month and never become additced. Heroin is an addictive drug but it can only do to you what you let it.

For anyone who is struggling, you can beat addiction. SWIM really has nowhere to talk because he has never experienced an addiction but he is telling you that you can do anything you put your mind to. You could say this instant that you will never take H again, and never do H again. SWIM cannot even imagine how hard this would be but its completely possible. SWIM was wondering though, how long do the withdrawls last for? Can a heroin addict ever recover fully from addiction, in the sence that they are not getting sick all the time. Surely they will think about heroin for the rest of their life, but heroin just does not have the ability to put its self inside of you. SWIM just wants to know how long the misery would last for. The pain and suffering would be miserable but well worth the rewards in the end. SWIM wont lie though, heroin is BOMB! No other opiate compares to it! The high is just so clean and so euphoric. Nothin matters at all. SWIM could definitely see how some would use it as an escape, and this is why he thought there might be a correlation between the current events in your life and addiction potential. Addiction can get anyone but it just seems that certain groups classes etc might be prone to addiction. I mean if your life sucks, you had a horrible child hood, just various factors probably make some people more prone to addiction.

For anyone out there who was or is addicted, what circumstances in your life led up to the addiction? Did your heroin start with recreational use or a tool to escape? SWIM would just like to know details of your first exposure and glimpse at addiction. Was there a small number of things causing it, large number, or did you just get addicted?

Good luck for anyone trying to win this fight. You can get help and and life can get much better. Hell this is a good place to hang if you just wanna chill and waste time, only thing is that it might remind you of heroin.

Well said bro.......reading these post make me feel how fucc up things are in life, but there is always a way out. like you said you can do anything in this world as long as u put your mind to it. stay in the fight brother and sisters!

[deadsoybean]

Originally Posted by raven3davis

For anyone out there who was or is addicted, what circumstances in your life led up to the addiction? Did your heroin start with recreational use or a tool to escape? SWIM would just like to know details of your first exposure and glimpse at addiction. Was there a small number of things causing it, large number, or did you just get addicted?

I was started on heroin at a very young age. When I was six I was a rape victim for a couple of years and the rapist would inject me with with heroin. When I turned eight, the guy had disappeared, but I had become dependent on the drug. I was forced to find a dealer and was left with little options to come up with the money for the drug. I was up to $300 worth daily at that age and it went up as I got older.

There was prostitution as well as pocket picking, any kind of theft at all. At the time I felt that I could not tell anyone about the addiction and proceeded to feed it.

No one knew about the addiction until my 11th birthday, and the only reason they had figured it out was because I attempted suicide. After my failed attempt I was checked into rehab for a year and a half. The moment I was released, I fell back to my usual ways. Heroin was my life and I did not know anything else, so falling back seemt inevidable: you experience boredum, depression and you were suddenly obligated to worry about things you had never even thought about before such as what clothes to buy, guys, things people in my age group thought of. It made no sense to me, plus, the cravings were too much to handle, so what do you do? You turn back.

Until I was about 14.5 did I continue to abuse heroin; that is, until my next suicide attempt. This time I was started on anti-depressants and methadone. Needless to say, I did not take either of those as prescribed, cheeked my anti-depressants and double/triple/etc dosed my methadone. I was still stuck to heroin.

About halfway through the age of fourteen as I mentioned, with random drug checks here and there, I was figured out. I was now not only addicted to heroin, but the prescribed methadone as well. My psychiatrist decided to take a new approach. She asked me if I truely wanted to get off of the heroin. I said I didn't now anything else but it. I was started on therapy and had an inplantment of Naltrexone and have been on it since. Therapy is teaching me how to be my age (turned fifteen on August 4th) and I am getting better.

Although I have not gone so much into detail, it has been one hell of a ride. I am required to have two urine tests and three blood tests a week to ensure that I am clean. I am also ongoing treatment for depression in which my medications are distributed through someone else so that I am not to skip doses.

A nine year addict and I'm letting go now. It has only been less than half a year since my last hit, but I'm hoping to make it a lifetime.

[humdroid]

SWIM's only opiate experience is DF118 and kratom.

The kratom was ok but a low dose, so may not have got full effects.

The DF118 is ok, provided SW have eaten prior, but the buzz is a bit too high pitched and swimmy for SW.

Heroin just scares the pants off SW.
SW is missing out but the fear of it keeps SW away, due to seeing some dark shit among SW's friends and associates.
There was only 2 good things which came out of SW's past speed addiction, one was his permanent tolerance to booze lowered, and the other, was this useful gem,
'No matter how excellent a drugs good points are, SW, or any prospective user of addictive substances must be able to answer "yes" to the following question':
"Once SW has used this substance, can SW honestly say they will be OK when not using"
The answer to the Q in respect to heroin, is "no" for me.

[oldbulllee]

swim is dopesick for second day.
no resources for an acute treatment of his symptoms.
swim wants to fucking die already.

oldbulllee added 296 Minutes and 41 Seconds later...

and, by the old OLD way of the SWIM resources have been found.
swim is better, in fact swim feels great.
until tomorrow,that is.the H swim scored this time is even better than usual, so he tells me.
swim is interested, there is probably a thread around here on that topic, but i'll ask anyway(on swim's behalf): how much does H cost in swiys countries,cities, towns etc? in grams(as that is the measure swim understands).
in swims country( most of the places) it is around XXXXX for gram.
fact being that,from what swim told me, it is a rare occasion to get a full gram in a bag.gram bag contains usually around 0.80 grams.but, that is just the way things are done around here; not much that swim or swiy can do about that.
my honest advice to all you swiys: DON'T DO HEROIN.
REALLY DON'T.
it sucks in every way,and the only way i or swim can imagine of doing it, and avoid utter ruin is to be filthy, stinking rich.
swiys probably aren't. swim too.

Reputation Comments on this post:

	Please start a thread bout heroin prices. We pay 450 dollars a gram in Aus!!!! It's crazy
	Price discussion is forbidden on this site

[chillinwill]

Price discussion is forbidden on here....Please go back and re read the rules which can be found at http://www.drugs-forum.com/forum/misc.php?do=cfrules

[dyingtomorrow]

Originally Posted by oldbulllee

my honest advice to all you swiys: DON'T DO HEROIN.
REALLY DON'T.
it sucks in every way,and the only way i or swim can imagine of doing it, and avoid utter ruin is to be filthy, stinking rich.
swiys probably aren't. swim too.

Good advice, and you are totally right.

SWIM is $200,000 in debt from H and living only by the care of others. Don't start doing it unless you are super rich. And if you do start doing it, don't inject. The needle is almost as addictive as the actual H. Once you start down that road it becomes a lot, lot harder to turn back, not to mention how much worse the withdrawals become.

The reason it is so bad is because it's so good. It's simple, if you could be in heaven every day, you'd stop doing earthly shit. Of course, admission into heaven isn't free, and eventually you run out of money. That's when it gets REALLY BAD. You start stealing and scraping and you are sick most of the time in hellish withdrawals. Maybe getting tortured in medieval times is worse, but I can't think of many other things that are.

As for the actual experience which is the topic, here it goes:

First all, it takes a while of doing IV H before you really experience how wonderful it is. The first couple times aren't usually that great, and that saves a lot of people fortunately. For most snorters it just knocks them the fuck out, and since they are used to the lighter nuances of snorting it, it turns them off and feels like a waste to them (ironically after you become an IV junkie, you wouldn't even consider snorting dope because of what a waste it seems like). After you have done it a couple times, it just gets better.

Every little thing about the ritual is unbelievably pleasurable. The ride back to your place on the bus or subway from the H spot, being a little sick but knowing how good this is going to be. Getting back to your place and taking your clothes off, throwing on a robe or something comfortable. Putting on your favorite music. Dumping the shit in the cooker. Seeing the beautiful carmel color cooking. Smelling that delicious smell. Filling the syringe. Putting your favorite part of a mix or song on. Finding a vein (you feel extra good if you get it in 1 try). See the blood swirl up into the syringe, which gives you a pleasurable rush even before you inject the H. Ohhh man. Then pushing the plunger in, your music is right on your favorite part. You feel it hit your heart and knock the wind out of you, it's hard to breathe for a second, and you are like FUCKING YESSS! Then it hits your head and your eyes just roll back into your head because this is the best feeling that it's possible for human biology to feel. Yes yes yes yes yes yes, the music is at the best part right when it hits, this is heaven. Then after a minute or so you start phasing in and out of consciousness. The best part is over, but you still feel very content.

The last stage of H addiction, where you feel the most pleasure, is when you are broke and in hell. You spend most of your time in such horrible physical pain and mental agony that when you actually score enough H to make up your "ideal" shot, it's even more pleasurable than when you can afford it all the time. You go from the depths of hell to the heights of heaven in a couple seconds, and that makes it as good as it can possibly be. To qualify this - it's only the best it can be when you have enough dope for 2 good shots, because if you only have enough for one, the anxiety over knowing you have no dope for later will kinda take away from the first shot.

Reputation Comments on this post:

makes for a vivid and enlightening read