Experiences - The Great Big How Has LSD Changed SWIY? Thread

[Dalfir]

SWID loves the free association thought-threads he get, that just go on and on...Random words and images just flying by.

[INSANEPOOKIE]

LSD has done a decent amount of positive things for SWIM and ZERO negative. One positive change that SWIM finds amusing is an immensely greater understanding of the difficulties that schizophrenic humans have to endure and it is not something they may simply turn off.

[Henfer]

yes, and SWIH thinks, that LSD raises sensivity for human emotions and psychical disorders and theirs understandings by a huge amount. In fact, SWIH thinks that some decent LSD tripping should be a basic requirement for being a psychatrist, because in this way they can experience the world of a disturbed mind in their own one.

[captainofcrush]

SWIM has dropped acid on three occasions. The first two times were low doses and were pretty pleasant but SWIM later realized he never had a full blown psychedelic experience. The third time SWIM took three hits. It was a terrifying experience. Although SWIM did have a bad trip, he is still too terrified to try acid again. Since the experience, he has episodes of obsessive thoughts, a general anxiety of the world melting away and anxiety of SWIM not even existing, not to mention horrible depression and self-destructive behavior. SWIM is not sure if he can handle any psychedelic drugs anymore and even has problems just being drunk or on opiates (wild behavior, nervousness, and drastic mood swings). Since that trip SWIM has felt confused about a lot of things. Now SWIM seems to be getting better by keeping a healthy diet, exercising, and avoiding drugs and alcohol, but SWIM still has occasional episodes of bad anxiety, confusion, and mood swings. To get by, SWIM just tries to find a purpose everyday.
So although acid can be wonderful and is enjoyed by many, it can still rip apart a fragile mind. SWIM would highly advise against doing it if you are already hyper tuned to your external and internal world. Because the acid just creates an overload of sensitivity and puts you in a horrible world of chaos that no human should have to experience. People take acid to reach a higher level of awareness that they can find again when not on the drug. But overdoing it will intensify your senses, mood, and cognition to a level that is just too unbearable for anybody.

Reputation Comments on this post:

A valuable post, thanks for sharing.

[shwinehund]

First time my pet martian bad tripped, he ran home and shut himself in his bedroom in order to calm himself. He had taken 1 hit of acid, and 3 hours later, 200-300mg of MDMA. He was having a good time walking around the neighbourhood, going to the park, smoking, talking, laughing, but he got tired, and things started to go downhill. (note: my martian has more experience with mushrooms, so calming himself is his natural remedy as opposed to distractions such as walking)

Anyhoo when he got home he went and lay down on his carpet, but this was too cold. So he lay on his bed, and this was very comfortable...till he awoke in a pouring sweat (fucking MDMA), opened all the windows and lay back on the carpet.

This was when shit got hectic...chaos was building in his head, little red cubes were piling onto his frontal cortex, this was were swim learned to "float down the river" as some say, but he also very quickly learned that this is only a temporary solution, and that "floating down the river" only works sometimes. Continually trying this made things worse than before. He felt as if there were giant wheels inside him that were trying to turn one way, but he was fighting to turn them the other way because he was scared of what would happen if he let them do their thing.

Well the shit started piling up behing these wheels until he couldn't hold on to it, then BAM. He can't explain it fully, but he felt as if he was clearing out all of his emotional garbage. Still had trouble letting some of the wheels go, but this felt glorious and became easier. He systematically thought about various relationships he has with people, how these relationships affect him, but also how they affect other people, and most importantly how they HURT people. He went through each relationship, one at a time, and sorted them out, not completly though but well enough for now(He really doesn't know why either, as he knows he has problems there, yet the LSD did not to let him pick at these yet...)
After all of this problem-solving, my martian got up and flicked on his lights, saw the walls in a pinky-yellow film and pulsating, yet this was mere aesthetics as the LSD seemed to say " ok, take 5, but we aint done yet" So the martian went downstairs and got himself a glass of The Universal Lubricant, drank it and went back to the carpet for the Grand Finale. As he settled down on the carpet, he felt the wheels turning, then he felt his back and neck get very warm, and suddenly what felt like a cold water being shot through the top of his head and out his tailbone, this seemed to take all the garbage left in his system. Then it was gone. No chaotic thoughts, infact his head and body seemed cleaner than it had ever been, all he needed to do was piss, and piss he did. He pissed out all of his hate, jealousy, greedyness, and emotional garbage, flushed and went to bed for real.

Changes: - He now realises that every action (no matter what size) has a reaction.
- He realises that he cannot always force things or make them fit HIS way.
- He realises that everything in the human experience is completely relative (there is no absolute)
- He realises a good mindset makes good intentions.
- It has also sparked his interest in meditation (prior to the above experience, he had never even heard the word "chakra" let alone what it ment)
- Oh and he swears to god that everytime things were a bit too tough for him during this experience, his cat who was sleeping next to him would reach over and put his paw on him as if to reassure him
-More respect for LSD

Reputation Comments on this post:

Great story, thanks for sharing.

[Desertfox]

Originally Posted by captainofcrush

SWIM has dropped acid on three occasions. The first two times were low doses and were pretty pleasant but SWIM later realized he never had a full blown psychedelic experience. The third time SWIM took three hits. It was a terrifying experience. Although SWIM did have a bad trip, he is still too terrified to try acid again. Since the experience, he has episodes of obsessive thoughts, a general anxiety of the world melting away and anxiety of SWIM not even existing, not to mention horrible depression and self-destructive behavior. SWIM is not sure if he can handle any psychedelic drugs anymore and even has problems just being drunk or on opiates (wild behavior, nervousness, and drastic mood swings). Since that trip SWIM has felt confused about a lot of things. Now SWIM seems to be getting better by keeping a healthy diet, exercising, and avoiding drugs and alcohol, but SWIM still has occasional episodes of bad anxiety, confusion, and mood swings. To get by, SWIM just tries to find a purpose everyday.
So although acid can be wonderful and is enjoyed by many, it can still rip apart a fragile mind. SWIM would highly advise against doing it if you are already hyper tuned to your external and internal world. Because the acid just creates an overload of sensitivity and puts you in a horrible world of chaos that no human should have to experience. People take acid to reach a higher level of awareness that they can find again when not on the drug. But overdoing it will intensify your senses, mood, and cognition to a level that is just too unbearable for anybody.

When SWIY took the lsd was it in combination with other drugs? and was SWIY tripping in the proper environment? It sounds to SWIM the LSD is bringing things to the surface of your psyche that you would just rather try and ignore than confront.

[Orchid_Suspiria]

At first lsd changed swim in a good way.It made him euphoric,spiritual,ohh how lovely the world was to swim in highschool.Over the years his other experiences sort of meshed with what the acid taught him yet took him away from it in a sense.Swim is apatheic,nihlistic,tired or anxious,afraid,like a trapped wild animal.Swim doesn't feel well.Is acid responsible?Indirectly,it showed him beauty but swim found things that were much more beautiful,too beautiful to be good.Now swim is in a state where he is afraid to be around lots of people and normally just has his cat for company.If this post makes little sense to swiy,swim is sorry.

Reputation Comments on this post:

Sorry to hear, but thanks for sharing.

[God_Albino]

the majority of my middle-aged relatives on both sides tripped alot, the three heaviest trippers all became fundamentalist christians.

my uncle who did the most is the most insane non-bipolar, non-schizo guy ive met. happy all the time, steady job, no hallucinations, weeeird as hell

Reputation Comments on this post:

Interesting, thanks for sharing.

[eltimmy]

SWID loves the free association thought-threads he get, that just go on and on...Random words and images just flying by.

A lot of people (SWIM included) think that this kind of mental association is a cornerstone of all creative, novel thought in general. If SWIY notices enhanced ability to think along these lines without the drug ... congratulations, LSD improved SWIY's creative potential.

[Benjamin Construct]

For sure Iguess u can say i had a really wild trip, being only 20 at the time and un-intelligently not doing my research before hand on the drug LSD,...The Drug opened doors into my world that i had no idea exsited!!!! And Because of my uneducation and resistance my life has changed!! LSD is truly not a drug but more of a tool....it has the power to do whatevr it wants to you!! And trust me did it ever... I was your typical party kid 20 yrs old and always throwing house parties in my home while the parents where out of the country!! LSD came into the mix and so did the paranoia....thinkingt hat it might be a drug like Exstasy or Speed i took alot....well not that much....anyways i was more or less a downto earth kid growing up , good sense of humor and a little imatuer but what the hell i was having fun!!! LSD put me in a mental block for so many years asking myself questions of... was that real?, why was i doing that?, could they really read my mind, am i nuts,where did the time go and so on,,,,,,,,The drug most have brought up some serious subconcious work because i was left with major neurotic anxiety and a obsessive need to reanaylize my self in a introspective way!!! over and over again....i dont blame the drug as much as i do my reistance to it while being high....as the drug wore off and my recovery and life style switch i found myself getting into Buddhism and spirituality....i found myself obsessed with higher states of conciousness and the belief that i had some mystical power that only i taped into(the drug experience and the beliefs i had at the time was still rooted in me ),,,,,how wrong was i!! First of all LSD in the mind tears away ones ability to contain there thought patterens in there egotistical way, usually like a spiritual awakening but this time more forced by the drug ..its tears away at your learnt ways and patterens and unravels you inner souls emotions ....for me i thought i was going mad....i though i was being erased and that i didnt exist..to this day those thought need healing and are now being replaced with the knowledge of reality and its egotistic tiers of evoultion..... the drug it self should not be tampered with just to get high on a friday night with your mates or going to watch a flick(though it probably would be out of this world) It can seriously depending on your nervouse sytem put u in a state of mind beyond repair..dabble gently trippers!!! to behonest the best way to gain tru insight into you worl dis meditate, excersie, learn to love you family, friends, strangers and practice the law of attraction....leave the drugs for the sick people!!

[ljfe]

Originally Posted by Dalfir

Coming from a traditional Goth background, he's found stronger appreciation in the Cyberpunk facet of the culture and seem to enjoy electronic music a lot more than before (not to say that he's totally rejected the other music he enjoys listening to.) His fashion sense somewhat reflects this, a move from solid black to colours like blues and reds.

SWIM hasn't taken LSD yet, but he plans on it. Other drugs has have this exact effect on SWIM. Ever since SWIM ate mushrooms, he can't stop listening to Infected Mushroom's trance (he first got their CD while tripping). Even though he hasn't changed his normal all black outfit, it does cross his mind. It slowly puts SWIM's hate behind.

[redpoppy]

swim first tried LSD at age 15. many people says swims personality is very acidy. but swim thinks she was always like this and always would have been as she comes from a family of enthusiastic, introspective, confident sparkly women almost al of whom have never done LSD.

[Dalfir]

Indeed, anyone that attributes your creativity to "24/7 acid use" are mundane, boring people.

[redpoppy]

Originally Posted by Dalfir

Indeed, anyone that attributes your creativity to "24/7 acid use" are mundane, boring people.

Although swims English GCSEs improved from an average of 60-70% to an average of 80 - 90% after swim had done LSD

SWIM was always good at other subjects such as maths and art so thsoe did not improve.

But with English its as though something "clicked" into place and she understood what the creative process of writing involved.

[Benjamin Construct]

again swim writes that he believes that lsd is a inner deconstructer that keeps the victim ina state of belief that he is aware of something greater which in reality always is ...hmmm what a waste of time.....

[mr. strawberry]

I found this string one time and picked him up. We chatted a bit and I asked him how a piece of string got to be so smart. he told me that when he was made he was covered in wax. His whole being was in wax except the very top of him and he never even KNEW he was covered in wax. One day, accedently, he was given some LSD and he suddenly became aware of this wax surrounding him and he didnt like it, it so he shed it off and has been much happier ever since.

[someonewim]

after LSd trip what changed in real your life???

someonewim added 1 Minutes and 58 Seconds later...

in your real life*** -.-

[Panthers007]

For many people, mature creatures that is, the perception of the world regarding interactions both intra-personal and world-view has somehow shifted. A more Gestalt outlook to make a synopsis. I'll explain:

Many people are normally locked into a finite view of what is going on around them. They meet Joe for coffee at the local bistro. And the conversation turns to Joe and his troubles with his wife. Ted normally views this as a trivial and tiring interaction. Post-LSD (or other psychedelics), Ted begins to view these trivial tales as a lesson of the timelessness of problems with people and how they have interacted throughout recorded history. Rather like seeing the forest for the trees. It takes on greater significance and opens Ted's eyes to a more involved, far-reaching history.

Ted goes to the beach to watch the waves roll in. Something he has done ever since he was a child. As a child, each wave struck Ted with a sense of awe at the power and beauty of the power of nature. But over the years, this became rather a chore instead of a spring-board to the mysteries of the world. But now Ted finds the majesty restored. The waves become time. The knowledge of the Moon's interaction becomes clear. The perfection of nature is re-achieved.

Ted has not changed from the LSD. Ted is simply grasping more concepts than prior to his excursion. All in the blink of an eye. Ted is not frightened by this change and cavalcade of information. On the contrary, Ted is feeling more whole about himself. Though is at a loss for words, at first, to describe the difference.

Ted continues in his day-to-day routine. But his level of satisfaction has improved. And he believes there will be more breakthroughs as the days go by. His coffee with Joe at the bistro no longer seems a chore.

Reputation Comments on this post:

excellent description

[Lobsang]

Well at different points in life my Tibetan priest friend tells me different things changed. At 14 years old he had a crazy trip and was seeing trails and afterimages and all his perceptions were altered for 2 years. He felt damaged and "removed" from the way things "were". This resolved but it is what changed. So he had regret and anxiety.

Another time the Tibetan priest was completely fractured by LSD. He confirmed that time is but a construct of the mind.

Another time he saw into the depths of the nervous system and realized that we are very very old and have within us everything we have ever been.

Many oter things ...Not just one thing. But the Tibetan priest says to say that many insights were not brought to full fruition until many years after the acid. The acid was one component in a series of experiences and contemplations that yielded conclusions.

So the Tibetan priest says that in order to get real change much work must be done either before or after the acid.

But the Tibetan priest says if he had not taken LSD and other chemicals he would still be a complete asshole. So the Tibetan priest is no longer an asshole or a hater. He no longer needs drugs. But he still has much to conquer.

Reputation Comments on this post:

Thanks for sharing.

[Desertfox]

For SWIM LSD has had a profound positive impact in swim's life. It helped him realize theres his brain is one of the most complex things in the universe and he was capable of so much if swim put his mind to it, and the pretty much only thing preventing him from succeeding in life is swim believing he's not smart enough or can't do something. Culture has conditioned swim to believe swim would be a failure for living a certain sort of lifestyle. With psychedelics SWIM realized much of his unhappiness in life was his own doing and took responsibility for himself and stopped blaming others for his own misfortune. Not to mention his spirituality and morals were virtually non-existent before SWIM had ingested any sort of drug, let alone any real comprehension of the concept of karma. SWIM was changed by psychedelics, but for him it was for the better.

[Lobsang]

Originally Posted by Desertfox

For SWIM LSD has had a profound positive impact in swim's life. It helped him realize theres his brain is one of the most complex things in the universe and he was capable of so much if swim put his mind to it, and the pretty much only thing preventing him from succeeding in life is swim believing he's not smart enough or can't do something. Culture has conditioned swim to believe swim would be a failure for living a certain sort of lifestyle. With psychedelics SWIM realized much of his unhappiness in life was his own doing and took responsibility for himself and stopped blaming others for his own misfortune. Not to mention his spirituality and morals were virtually non-existent before SWIM had ingested any sort of drug, let alone any real comprehension of the concept of karma. SWIM was changed by psychedelics, but for him it was for the better.

Good for you SWIy...Good for you! Would love to hear exactly how the experiences went and how the changes were realized. My compliments to SWIy...

[Panthers007]

SWIM un-earthed some material/perspective that is normally kept buried in the backrooms of SWIM's mind. Psychedelics eat through personal-defenses like the proverbial hot-knife through butter. This is why it is suggested that young people (maturity-wise, not necessarily age-wise) steer clear of LSD25 et al.

SWIM needs to calmly and clearly look at what material SWIM had going through his mind. And avoid, while so doing, being judgemental about same. Every SWIM is like a deck of cards. All contain the Kings and the Deuces. The aces and the jokers. The wise SWIM knows which card to play in any given situation, while the fool is dealt the hand. So don't be afraid, SWIM - take a clear look. Then the feelings that are troubling SWIM will pack their bags and head off into the sunset.

[captainofcrush]

Well SWIM has gone over the experience in his head now and has been thinking a lot. First SWIM completely forgot that he drank two beers right after ingesting the LSD to help calm SWIM down (SWIM heard this was good advice). I don't think the beer actually calmed SWIM down though, instead I think it actually made him get out of control. SWIMs previous experiences with LSD involved no alcohol and he never had any problems (although he never ingested much).

The other major thing SWIM concluded about the trip is that he is now afraid of chaos and things being out of control. Since the trip, everything around SWIM seems like it is out of control and chaotic, hard to make sense of. Before tripping SWIM used to thrive on intensity and powerful things because he felt he was related. Now SWIM is just the opposite and it is making him down. But now SWIM has at least faced the trip and has possibly figured out what the problem is.

SWIM supposes the wise thing to do is not resist the scary feelings SWIM has about things beyond his control, including himself. If SWIM can embrace this and just go with it instead of resist it and suffer, he might just fall back into his regular cycle of self and feel normal. Any input is helpful.

[spacelord]

Originally Posted by captainofcrush

The other major thing SWIM concluded about the trip is that he is now afraid of chaos and things being out of control. [...]
SWIM supposes the wise thing to do is not resist the scary feelings SWIM has about things beyond his control, including himself. If SWIM can embrace this and just go with it instead of resist it and suffer, he might just fall back into his regular cycle of self and feel normal. Any input is helpful.

Exactly, facing it is the only way to deal with anxiety in general.
SWIY appearently takes good care of himself as he mentioned regular exercise, healthy diet. Atm he is figuring out what's good for him an acting accordingly, which will probably lead to major improvement.

If the mentioned problems don't mean major obstacles in daily life seeing a therapist or such should be unnecessary. SWIY is on the right track!

[Panthers007]

Nobody said that in-depth psychoanalysis was going to be easy. Tell that to SWIM. It can be a Royal Bitch. However:

It sounds like SWIM is more than half-way home. SWIM should land shortly. Pick up his bags and head for the EXIT sign. Then suggest he do what is inevitable. Think about what he learned. Writing. Poetry. Music. Sculpture. Many methods of expression help. Tell SWIM not to be afraid. He's doing fine.