hooked on the needle

[larak]

Hi there. This is my first forum ever. I am a MSc student in the field of addictions and are wanting next year to do my PHD on needle fixation. I personally have been able to get opiate dependent friends into at least three days of withdrawal, yet some of them can not get over the want for the fit and will jump out of my window and inject water, ect. I have searched all available literture on this and have been unable to come up with any answers for this. Any experiences or answers would be much apprieciated. Thank you. Stay safe.

[motorhead]

Wow,a potential phd student with iv using friends, cool. fuck the literature, write your own. Sounds like u have your thesis right there before your eyes. The books dont have the answers to the questions you seek, i think your friends do. I think you are asking the reason why people are addicted to shit, not just the reason why people are addicted tothe spike.


Addiction is a ritual, addiction is a substitution for lust, addiction is a noose, addiction can sometimes be a whore, sometimes i can be a whore, addiction is the absence of everything you could possibly be. Stay safe?? Its easier not to be.

[lolomgwtfbbq]

I guess it's just the addiction to the general situation.

I know people who are recovered addicts & they all pick up new
things to do. One person I know makes necklaces and she sneaks out to
the craft store & buys beads and hides them from her husband
because she got so used to that behavior when she was using.

When I quit smoking for a while, I would always notice myself 'packing'
random things that were even slightly rectangular shaped and holding
pens/pencils just like cigarettes and sucking on them just like I was
smoking.

</font>

[dartboard]

Can't offer any shocking revelations as to why IV users are so attached to the needle, but can confirm that you are correct in your observations. Of course I wouldn't be caught with a rig in my possession, as they are illegal to have empty or full of the best Nazi dope the midwest has to offer. But SWIM can confirm that the attraction the the whole damn procedure is addictive. SWIM has been know to smoke a little maintenance hit and set of a rig with H2O to do at the same time.


Just like Motorhead said "Addiction is a ritual, addiction is a substitution for lust.........". If you think you kmay know the qustions to ask that will wake my sleeping vocabulary, feel free to contact me and I'll be happy to try and help you out.





dartboard

[LostInSpace]

Well, before I cleaned up, the needle was my everything.


I don't care no how no way what anyone says, there is no way to get
blasted out of your freakin' mind than with a rig.


There is no way to explain it, and junkies can't even talk about it, but
it's an unspoken demon, a friend, a lover, and only the junkie knows it
by name, and in spirit only.


There is no book, no spoken word, nor written on stone, paper, nor
otherwise that will ever explain the feeling of the rig about 2-5
seconds after the plunger has hit bottom.


I rest my case, as I have no case, and no one but God will ever
explain it to any degree of human understanding.


Lost

[Inkmanr6]

I injected for the first time ever a couple weeks ago. I Have to fight not to go out and get it again. That stuff is insane when you inject. I had snorted H many times before...needle made it like 10x as addictive for me. I'm off of everything now though

[Creeping Death]

It's really hard to explain. The heaviest stuff ive ever injected is morphine, and i still fell in love with the whole "ritual". I like to inject even though ive never felt the pleasure of heroin.

I guess its some type of fantasy of "harming yourself to get to a better place", instead of just being harmed without anything in return (i.e normal life). I dont know, havent thought much about it.

[dillydude]

I started I.V.'nDiluadid bout 16 or 17 months ago, it started slowly at first , then as of thhis past Feb. / 05 I was heavily into eveything. I've gotten to the point of shootin water as a substitute when I was out of shit to bang. I was bangin any kind of morphine based pill I could get my hands on, plus crack, cocaine in the powder form, and even special "K" . . Finally I got sick and tired of being sick and tired, and threw in the towel.


There no info that you'll get out of books or web pages, but you'll probably get the best info from your friends.


I will gladly answer any questions that you might have.

[alchemyescape]

is anyone else here hooked on booting? even if i don't have any H or
code or oxy's i'll sometimes just shoot up water. since i started
shooting i dont sniff. when i get shit i used to do a little at my
guy's house, but now i just wait until im with my works. anyone else in
love with the rush?

[motorhead]

MMMM i am an IV user and i certainly enjoy the needle and all. Now that i mainline i never snort if there is a choice. Well not coke anymore unless i happen to come across some pure stuff, because the cut in blow is unreal around here and makes me nervous now. Anyway ive read lots of posts about people shooting water when out of dope and heard about it plenty before, but it is something i never do. I think it will be an obvious signal that im super hooked and i dont want that to happen. I messed up with crack in the past and i dont want to go down that road with opies. I think i can understand why people do it however as shooting up is a wonderful ritual that can be addictive in itself. The excitement of rigging up can be a rush all its own.

[miffy]

I wouldn't hit water, but I've got mates who have done things like
that. . . and, it has to be said I do prefer hitting to smoking /
snorting etc. I won't hit pills, etc that are meant to be
ingested in other ways, bit I have hit crack in the past. . .



BTW - in the UK, we say 'booting' to mean smoking off foil. . if anyone's interested!


Edited by: miffy

[unico_walker]

Weird I always heard booting to mean sticking it where the sun don't shine into absorbant, absorbant mucus membranes.

[amd6568]

Man, SWIM just can't see how people can shoot up, just not his thing I guess. SWIM gets a strong nervous laugh just by touching SWIM's vein above his elbow. Guess SWIM is scared of doing it. Not sure if SWIM will ever feel the rush of shoting, but hope it is worth it.

[Gargalos]

Shooting is worth it for some. SWIM's shot ice and speed before, love the taste in the back of the mouth and the rush of almost auditory quality when you find nice stuff .





Don't do it though. I'd try and talk anyone out of it that wanted to try it. Since I've done it, I've always been responsible, clean and safe. I know far too many people that aren't though, and are hooked just on the feeling of the needle piercing their skin, which I find most disturbingly disgusting. I can understand all to well, but I set myself limits which I reamain faithful to. I just wouldn't feel right encouraging anyone to try it in that method. I'd hate to see them later on, lost on a path they might have avoided. (I mean this for the more selfish reason that I would feel bad that it was me who did it too, and I don't like to feel bad like that .

[Tuffynuff]

Alchemyescape, I agree, the needle itself is part of the addiction. The ritual of mixing, tying off and finally inserting the needle is all part of the final climax. Kind of like forplay. Slowly building until the ultimate rush. My boyfriend and I used to hit cocaine mixed with rum or vodka instead of water sometimes. Just for a little variety.


It's the same thing with crack, especially if you cook your own; and any other drugs that require some kind of preperation. This whole "preperation period" in itself becomes addicting. Part of the "ritual" Part of the whole drug experience.


But I agree, there is nothing quite like the needle. This part of the forum is about addiction and recovery so I will add this. The boyfriend I spoke of is now dead (suicide) and I have been clean since the day he killed himself seven years ago. Why am I here? I'm not sure. I think it's because I find the whole drug world very interesting. Peoples thoughts, drug experiences (good or bad)tragedies, triumphsand recovery stories are highly interesting to me and each one is unique. So, for all of you that are still using...be safe andfor all of you in recovery.....the best of luck to you.

Reputation Comments on this post:

enjoyed reading your honest post

[Cure20]

Originally Posted by Gargalos

Shooting is worth it for some. SWIM's shot ice and speed before, love the taste in the back of the mouth and the rush of almost auditory quality when you find nice stuff .

What do you mean by the taste in the back of your mouth?

[dillydude]

I've been into the shooting quite heavy,up until this past Feb.


I used to shoot anything I could get my hands on, opiate based pills dilaudid,oxycontin, morphine sulphate, morphine, and even tried a perc once. Also I've shot heroin, coke, crack, special K, sleeping pills,benzos,and one more opiate based pill I've forgot to mention was.demerol. Even steroids ( I.M. ) too.


I also shot waterat the times when I could'nt find anything else to shoot.


I was super hooked on the rig. Got clean back in Feb. had a few relapses, the went completely straight for the months of April, May, and June, almost all of April anyway.In total I've acquired around 70 plus days without even smoking weed or drinkng , completely straight.


Now I can sit and knowingly think about how it used to be,( scared of withdrawils) ,and even say to myself if I don't get stoned today it's not a big deal. And just recently instead of banging pills, I've snorted and eatin them on a few occasions .


So in my opinion there can be a mental (with a forced physical) addiction to the needle.


Also it can become easily a ritual that makes you feel good, and feeling good is fun.Edited by: dillydude

[sterckxke]

What do you mean by the taste in the back of your mouth?

Thts omething specific with every substance u shoot, know what hes talking about when u do you're first shot.
Its like u taste something thats isn't there...

[dillydude]

When you shoot cocaine or crack, (IMO) you get a signifagant taste in the back of your mouth, it's like putting a little dab of coke on the back of your tounge.

[old hippie 56]

Just to read these posts has made my arms itch and that funny feeling you get while you are rigging up. Hadn't shot in a while but I can still remember my first time. The rush, the god awful taste on the back of your tongue, and the ringing of the bells in your head. Hell, I can remember shooting dope better than I can remember my first sexual encounter. If you do shoot, be clean, and know your drug.

[VincentVan]

I must admit that part of the kick of the vice for me was (is?) to watch my blood drawn into the syringe slowly mixing with the magical substance before getting pushed back into the waiting ,swollen vein.


Still, shooting water seems a very poor substitute and pretty silly too (I hope you boil the water at least). I guess you are just getting aquainted with the voluptuary use of hypodhermic needles, or you would save your veins for the real thing. Do you also smoke banana´s peel?


" I had realised before now that it is only a clumsy and erroneus form of perception which places everything in the object, when really everything is in the mind. "


Marcel Proust - from " In search of lost time" vol. VI, "Time regained"

[Gargalos]

Originally Posted by Cure20

What do you mean by the taste in the back of your mouth?

When you take a large hit of whizz in a mainline, enough to make you
puke your ring out, you will feel the drug rush through your brain and
down your body as your heart pumps it through you. I generally hold my
arm up higher then my head to convince myself that more is going to my
brain (sometimes I lay down to make my head the lowest part of my body
for the same reason). It also gives you a taste of chemicals and blood
in the back of your mouth. Thats what it tastes like to me and my mates
anyway. It could just be one of those mind games though...

[heroin_ed]

SWIM is glad to know he's not the only one who has an "addiction" to the rig. He started back last feb and did it for 6 weeks straight, stopped for 5 months and started up again. SWIY is right, it's like foreplay to the rush. SWIM's favorite part is sticking the needle in, pulling the plunger and watching blood come into the barrel to confirm that the needle is in a vein, then pushing on the plunger and counting to eight and BAM it hits him.

[heroin_ed]

But then again that's probably everybody's favorite part

[BumpBump]

needle fixation swim thinks its called?