DESPERATE Need advice about a weed problem. (kinda long..)

[serendipity.x]

Hi there. I'm looking for some advice for how to get someone to see that they have a problem with weed. How to help them to see how much they're losing and destroying by continuing the way they are.

He wants us all to accept that he smokes weed a lot, but how can we when he
- chooses to buy weed over food
- buys weed without paying for it, from people he's only just met ("ill pay you later" kinda thing)
- wants to be permafried
- uses his parents money to buy weed, when they're in debt
- almost got kicked out of his place twice for it
- is failing school, and if he fails one more class he's kicked out
- goes to class high, even the one he's failing
- he smokes 24/7, wherever, whenever
- lost two of his best friends
- lost his girlfriend, the girl he wanted/wants to marry
- he's losing more friends as we speak
- he surrounds himself with it, and people who smoke it constantly (as well as do other things)
- lies about it constantly
- is willing to let people who he cares very much about walk out of his life
- is totally stone faced (he never looks unhappy, but he never looks happy either)
- when he doesn't have it, or if it's been a bit...he gets aggressive and hostil
- he is in total denial
- I'm kinda the only one still trying. all of his friends have talking to him, but they all stopped now.
- i have tried threatening to leave. i have tried leaving. ive tried yelling and fighting about it. ive tried sympathizing, and asking him his side. ive tried compromises. ive tried talking to his parents. his friends. weve had physical fights. ive sat there, in his arms, shaking and crying for hours. and he still didnt get it......

I'm at a loss. Please help me. I don't want to hear "give up on him, there's nothing you can do"
I'm aware that it's hard to make them see. And I know that they won't change until they want to...but....I know there is something. I love this boy more than anything. And I know he loves me, but right now the weed is more important.

Please I am begging you.

[tetrahydrocanna]

Hello!

Sounds like your friend has got caught up in a bad circle. Probably he has something deeper he's running from. If he's just in to the high so much he will probably get boored about chasing the high as his tolerance gets up, and he gets depressed from his cb receptors shutting down from over stimulation.

Seems the first solution is to talk sence with him. And then maybe use the tincture method described further down... He dont have to quit, just use the tincture and low doses to be able to cope with school and everyday activities, and then get stoned when it's appropriate. This may be problematic with just smoking weed, cause one gets to stoned with that method of ingestion. So low dosage tincture would keep hem sane and feeling good, without ruining his life. Explain that to him and help him make the tincture.

An other maybe a bit extreeme way to get him of the stuff is to in some way persuade him to use this plant to block cannabis addiction:
url en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Delphinium_brownii
url newscientist.com/article.ns?id=dn11904

(im unable to post links... atm..)

Though the plant is toxic in to high doses, so one need to research it more.

If your friend wants to be able to function and still have THC in his system, though not beeing totally blasted, but still have no abstinence from not smoking, he should try low dosage (1-5ml) alcohole tincture (concentration: 30g buds infused in 1L 96% alcohol.) This is also a good way of coming down lightly, to avoid the sweats and discomfort from discontinuing heavy and long term cannabis use.

[SmokeRings]

SWIM wonders how old you are as well as your friend. SWIM finds it hard to believe that weed is the only drug involved with the things you've written. SWIM is only speculating, simply because it's rare to find someone that out of control over weed. This is strictly SWIMs opinion and would like to remind everyone of that.
SWIM thinks your friend might be into a bit more than just weed, from the sound of his/her behavior. You said "as well as do other things" which would lead SWIM to believe that maybe your friend is into harder substances, that might lend to the behavior.
SWIM could be totally off base, maybe your friend is that big of a freak for weed. If so, your friend isn't even enjoying weed, it's supposed to chill you out, not make you aggressive and angry. SWIM wouldn't smoke weed at all if it made her that way!
Have you talked to your friend and if so, what is their reasoning behind it all?
SWIM knows you don't want to hear this, but only your friend can decide to cut back, stop, whatever. No one is going to be able to make them stop, period. It's unfortunate, but true.
Could you possibly give a bit more background as far as age, timeframe, etc?

[Jiggles]

If the only substance that is truly involved here is weed, then it would definitely appear as if this boy has other problems he's running from in his life.

What SWIY must understand is that it's not the weed that is doing this to him, it is himself, self medicating. Making the weed the central focus is not going to help him. If he really just would rather sit around and get high and not deal with life's problems, then that isn't a result of the weed, it's his own core personality. He could have many things buried deep down that he doesn't want to deal with and is using pot as a way to keep the focus OFF of these things. By focusing on the pot SWIY is giving him exactly what he wants.

It sounds as if this boy could benefit from a professional to talk to. OP said that SWIY has tried sympathizing with him, and asked him his side, but has SWIY TRULY understood what the boy is going through? If so, then maybe it is time to let him go and make him understand what the real world is like when his life falls apart. If not, keep trying to see through the bullshit he is pulling and get to the actual core of the issue, if possible.

That is just SWIM's 2cents, take it or leave it