Most Intensely Sober Moment

[Diphenhydramine]

Anyone want to share some intense moments that they've experienced in their lives, sober?



A couple months ago, I was at a party, when things started to get a
little intense and obnoxious. I went outside to enjoy the
sunset. I walked downhill on a lawn and then lay down.
Looking up, I watched the sun depart slowly, when I had the intense
moment. The sky looked as if it was only a few inches in front of
me. I felt as if I could touch the universe. And then it
hit me. For 15 minutes, I could feel what infinity was. I
could truly understand the breadth and size of the entire
unvierse. It was truly beautiful. I broke down and started
crying, it was so amazing. And after about 15 minutes, it
ended. And I only remember that it occurred, not what it felt
like. Oh well, I guess I was lucky. Anyone else have
something cool that happened to them, perhaps in nature?

[chico]

Originally Posted by Diphenhydramine

Anyone want to share some intense moments that they've experienced in their lives, sober?

A couple months ago, I was at a party, when things started to get a little intense and obnoxious. I went outside to enjoy the sunset. I walked downhill on a lawn and then lay down. Looking up, I watched the sun depart slowly, when I had the intense moment. The sky looked as if it was only a few inches in front of me. I felt as if I could touch the universe. And then it hit me. For 15 minutes, I could feel what infinity was. I could truly understand the breadth and size of the entire unvierse. It was truly beautiful. I broke down and started crying, it was so amazing. And after about 15 minutes, it ended. And I only remember that it occurred, not what it felt like. Oh well, I guess I was lucky. Anyone else have something cool that happened to them, perhaps in nature?

U sure you were sober? Bro, you just described a nice trip that I would like to experience someday. U sure you weren'thopped upon something?


Did you breathe in some gnarly smoke from the party,unknowingly?Edited by: chico

[PenguinPhreak]

Keep in mind that if you are a drug user, events such as this could just be a flashback or similar phenomena.

[transit]

For me, drugs are just one package along
with several others which can be used to more deeply explore existence. </span>They work really well for some things, and
not for others. </span>I have often found that
some things go unnoticed until they hit me in the face (figuratively speaking)
and I can’t avoid experiencing them.
</span>Subsequently I notice and experience them at a far lower threshold. </span>Drugs can be a useful tool for me in bringing
things into my awareness and sensitizing me to them in such a way that when
fully sober they can more easily enter my awareness.</span>


While I have had amazing experiences with
the assistance of drugs, my best experiences, the one’s I value most, even the
ones that were most intense, were not on drugs, though perhaps I never would
have allowed myself to experience them if it were not for learnings from my
drug trips. </span>While drugs can help to open
doors; there are other things that can also help; and sometimes doors serendipitously
open for no observable reason.</span>


One intense experience for me occurred at
the culmination of a group structure which occurred over several days in which exercises
involving intimate touch were practiced, lots of dance occurred, emotional
release breathwork was engaged it, ejaculation was forbidden, and much more was
done to open and build energy. </span>At the
end of it, I was receiving an erotic massage from a woman combined with
breathing exercises when suddenly for me the room was filled with light and I
was one with the universe (a rather inadequate description of it really). </span>It was the sort of experience that some
people with different personality styles than mine would create a religion out
of. </span>It was amazing and awesome. </span>And I had no drug intake for at least a few
weeks prior to it.</span>





Diphenhydramine, I encourage you not to let
anybody dismiss the validity of your experience. </span>



</span></span></span>

[yuval]

last year i took a 2-week SSY meditation course in India (yogic meditation). the course ended in a 4-day retreat. the last 24 hours i was feeling quite drunk from happiness.


however it wasn't as intense as taking hard drugs, i must say

[Diphenhydramine]

MOTHERFUCKER! i wrote a long reply, and then when I tried to submit it, it "timed out."



Let me try again.



No, I was not intoxicated. I am aware when I have substances in
my body. I do believe that most drugs create permanent chemical
pathways in our brains that allow us to view the world in a different
light, place importance (visually) upon items that we might not have
before, and see things sometimes, even when sober, that might not exist
in reality. I do not view these as "flashbacks." I thought
flashbacks were due only to emotional trauma associated with the
drug. That has never happened to me, so no, this was not a
flashback.



Transit, was your "group structure" some form of tantric
activity? Your mention of erotic massages and forbidden
ejaculation makes me think of that.



I apologize in advance if this is a repost.

[chico]

Diphenhydramine, the forum has been "timing out" on me quite bit lately. I've lost a few posts myself because of the same thing. Damn that sucks!


Anyways, I hope I didn't sound demeaning/sarcastic when I asked if you were tripping earlier. Seriously, your description of what you experienced was something I'd love to go through. I've just never had it. I've read in another thread that you meditate quite a bit and even take yoga classes. Perhaps this aided your experience. Maybe I should try this!

[transit]

Originally Posted by Diphenhydramine

was your "group
structure" some form of tantric activity?

</span>


It was a mix of westernized tantra, Taoist sexuality,
and neo-Reichian body work.</span>


To avoid the problem of timing out, I often
do the write up in a word processing program and then paste it over into the 'post reply' box.</span>

[Ephemerides]

Recently my life has felt very flat. Like I haven't accomplished much
in my life. And my girlfriend and I split up, for college, for real, after 3
years of off and on. As I was going through this hard time I would get so upset and
frustrated. I'd feel so alone that for some split seconds I'd feel
intensely confused and as though I was tripping, just an overwhelmed
confused feeling of not knowing what to do or who to go to.
Edited by: Ephemerides

[writeright]

A lot of times, if I stay awake until 4 or 5 in the morning, I get real weird. I'll just be lying in my bed, unable to sleep, and not on any drugs. I'll think about existence, and why I'm even here in the first place, and it'll be amazing. I'll feel like I've got it all figured out, but I just can't sort it out in my mind. I feel at peace and the most content I've ever felt. Just thinking about the fact that colors exist or sounds or music or anything amazes me. All I have to do is look around and I am completely in awe.


...But then I start to get paranoid. I think about death and my salvation, and if I really am doing everything right. I don't really have any religious views as of right now, and I get scared that Christianity might be true and that I'm going to hell. Or, I'll think someone is watching me and life is all just a big game or experiment. I'll start to cry randomly and I'll get scared that I'm going to start hallucinating by just thinking about things too much.


Maybe I think too hard or maybe I'm manic-depressive. Either way, it only happens when I don't sleep enough and I'm not on any drugs.

[chico]

writeright, what's up with your avatar? It's freakin' me out, bro? Edited by: chico

[writeright]

It's a scene from Un Chien Andalou, a short film by Salvador Dali. Dali is my hero.

[Diphenhydramine]

Chico, it's alright. I didn't percieve your post as such.
Meditation would be a good idea. Check that meditation
thread...there seems to be some good replies on it in terms of getting
started.

[jaguarangel]

It is time to find your passion. Do what you enjoy. Be interested in someone
or something. What you focus your attention on grows. If you focus on
negativity, you will get more of it. This life is precious. Appreciate your life.
You are healthy, you have taken care of survival to even go on these thought
tangents. Love yourself enough to quite beating on yourself and have fun.
Use your energy to love other people in your life and your life will for sure
go up!

[phenethylamine]

the size of the universe is found in an atom! the realities we live in our in our dome pieces and we are left to interact.

[Nicaine]

Originally Posted by Diphenhydramine

Anyone want to share some intense moments that they've experienced in their lives, sober?

At one point (maybe around 1999-2000) I was experiencing Savikalpa Samadhi on a regular basis. This is sort of like immediate, intense absorption in whatever your eyes/ears fall on, to the point of seemingly no separation between you and the aforementioned object(s). It's quite euphoric and blissful, at times intensely so. Anger, attachments, desires, they all fall away completely.

So-called "spiritual" practice and investigation (preferably drug-free) is IMHO the most rewarding thing life has to offer. Meditation/contemplation can be amazing, but it's not something you can practice once or twice a week and expect results... you have to dedicate hours to it, perhaps attend to it full time for awhile to the exclusion of everything but eating/sleeping. This potentially results in a state of unbroken meditation, even during sleep.

At some point, I sort of gave it up and decided to dive into what I'd missed to a great extent: "Real life," the experiences of a normal person doing normal things. The Buddha had to go through this before enlightenment. It's impossible to escape the world, the path invariable leads through and not around. Everything can be instructive and helpful, even the most hellish of experiences (e.g. drug addiction)... it's all in how you look at it.Edited by: Nicaine

[motorhead]

Writeright, you should start a thread on Dali, or pyschedelic artwork. DidntDali once say that he didnt have to take LSD because he was LSD or something like that? His artwork is so incredably psychedelic, its amazing he did all that while sober. What wasthat other fellas name?, Ecsher it think it is. He has some really interesting stuff as well,very akin to lsd visuals and stuff.


As for my most intense sober moment, i would have to say being in the delivery room for the birth of my son. My head was spinning for a week. You cansee it on tv all you want, but once you're in there man....whao.