Alcohol Relapse!

[Mikeymc]

Hey I am a 24 year old gay male, I was sober since december 10 until today when i picked up a beer, and then had another....I had two stupid fu*king drinks. 5 months and for what to feel good for and hour or two...really am I that weak of a person...how do you feel this devil, its always waiting to bite! Please help. PM, POST just help

[Dickon]

Mikeymc,

First and foremost: don't panic! Despite what AA might preach there is a difference between a lapse and a relapse. Just because you had a couple of beers today doesn't mean that all the good work you've put in is wasted.

The important thing to do now is to consider what now? My cat has had the same problem except alongside alcohol he used to engage in certain other things too, but has gone through periods of alcoholic drinking. If you want to talk to me privately you're welcome to, although I'd suggest talking a bit more about what's happened on here.

Are you in AA, or do you have any other support available? DF can be really helpful here, and there have been quite a few people dealing with lapses and relapses on here recently who might be able to help.

What exactly happened to make you drink? How did you get sober in the first place? We're here to help! Try your utmost not to drink any more today.

Dickon

[bananaskin]

You are a brave and honest person for coming on here and saying you had a drink... we are not here to judge you, the main purposes of this forum are harm-reduction and support.
As Dickon says, try very hard not to drink any more today ... you did really well to get this far and this is just a blip, a minor slip and nothing more.

[jon-q]

Excuse me for being so blunt mikey, but whoever it is that’s making you feel so guilty about this minor slip? Please tell them to suck my cock

Think about it…. You have gone FIVE MONTHS WITHOUT A DRINK. Give yourself a pat on the back for that.

Now for the serious stuff, stopping drinking is difficult and the chances are at some point you will relapse, I’m not saying that to comfort you it’s just the facts.
At this moment in time you have a couple of drinks. This isn’t a disaster, nobody’s failed, this isn’t any devil proving your not strong enough, it’s just a couple of drinks, yea.
Put this slip down to experience, learn from it, try and work out why it happened today and figure out how you can prevent it from happening tomorrow.

Try not to use this lapse as an excuse to resume drinking, at least learn from your mistake and use it to ensure you don’t slip up again.
I wish you the best of luck.
Q

[yaba]

Hi mate,

Don't give up we (many DF users) have been there or are going true it right now... Swim is going true a shit time.. So your not alone !!!

Really one "fuck up" doesn't mean all is lost, just remember why and what happened and try to learn from it !

Yes a mistake has been made but it a mistake not the end of the world !
Just do not do it again and its a lesson learned...

[Mikeymc]

Well first off I got sober through a treatment center....and yes I do belong to a couple aa groups, but honestly do not find them to be so much as a safe haven...one the gay meeting i go to is more of a place to find guy friends...lol. I am currently in the process of moving and have found that to be incredibly stressful...After having some sobriety for a period of time I felt i could handle it, perhaps this was a way of me trying to scare myself out of it...I mean really two beers...seems like if i wanted to jump off the wagon i shouldve gone more hardcore....no i feel more sad than anything.

[yaba]

There is no one or two beers for alcoholics its stopping and having a relapse, good swiy feels sorry for him self ! A lesson learned ?

Try to forget about it and don't do it again ! Never been to an AA or any of the drink drugs help groups. Except when swim was 15 to get methadone.. And he tried to get of his yaba addiction in Amsterdam but they weren't that helpful, as the weren't used to it that was 11 years ago.

Really for your swim not all is lost !!! Ands if its any consolation look at one of my treads and swim isn't having fun either..!

Reputation Comments on this post:

Good simple straight to the point advice, nice one.

[Mikeymc]

yeah i defientely have had my share of meeting, I do enjoy going to most of them. Oh and I am well aware that there is no difference between having one or two or getting completely trashed....this I know and feel...luckily for me I stopped after the second drink..its the guilt that is now more overwhelming than that of the anxiety which made me drink in the first place.

[bananaskin]

Mikeymc,

There has been a lot of frank advice here.
We all say you did well to have two beers only, and we all agree that this was a slip-up and nothing worse.
Today you don't drink... today you are clean.
One day at a time is the only way to be as an addict.
If you slip up again, you must just pick up where you left off, but this is NO EXCUSE to have a day off the wagon.
Be strong.

[Mikeymc]

Just an update, after I slipped and drank two beers yesterday, I came on the forum, and talked about it, obviously lol...thanks for all the support, I didnt drink anymore yesterday after coming on so that in its self was a small victory and its back to battle today. Again thanks for all the support

[bananaskin]

That's really good.
One day at a time... please if you need us again for advise or just to talk at (in a constructive way!) just give us a bell

[Ilsa]

coming in a bit late on this one....but, having read over the thread, it appears that swi-mikeymc has gotten past much of the guilt that comes with an early relapse ( aka the first relapse after a serious, extended period of being clean). this is good, as it means that swiy realizes that a lapse/relapse is not the end of the game, just a challenge to be overcome.

the slip may feel like square one, particularly in terms of guilt, but this is also one of a very few situations in which guilt, and the remembrance of it, can be constructive in terms of controlling impulses. thus, it can be a learning experience.

Reputation Comments on this post:

Thanks for the positive reinforcement

[Catnap]

Originally Posted by Mikeymc

Just an update, after I slipped and drank two beers yesterday, I came on the forum, and talked about it, obviously lol...thanks for all the support, I didnt drink anymore yesterday after coming on so that in its self was a small victory and its back to battle today. Again thanks for all the support

I think thats brilliant - well done Keep going, you are doing so well x

[Mikeymc]

Yeah I think I have gotten over the guilt of it. I know that recovery is a learning process. The road would not always be smooth, there will be bumps, curbs, ditches(hopefully not collapsed bridges). Its the knowledge and experience I gain from the relapse(being my first) that I take with me that will be the most important. Different ways to handle the situation in the future. Again I cant thank everyone enough for the support, I have been sober since those beers, and god willing will put some more time under the belt!

[ex-junkie]

nice one mikeymc.

the worst thing one can do is to torment themselves over a slip up. as long as you learn something from it when it happens, then its not a bad thing. alot of people tend to beat themselves up about it, then continue to drink to deal with the emotions involved- feeling like theyve failed, guilt, shame, etc...

the second you realize its just a minor mistake, and nip it in the bud there and then, youre already showing signs that you are in fact recovering. so be pleased with yourself for dealing with it the way you did.