Addiction - Since K got over me

[Niteflights]

Many years ago SWIM obtained massive literal lifetime supply of pure quality K. After a year of moderation SWIMs life changed and he spiralled into a 6 month ketamine addiction using constantly unless he was asleep. After coming to his senses SWIM got rid of the supply of K.

4 years have passed and every day SWIM thinks of K a great deal. To be honest there is nothing SWIM misses more. K is no longer available.

SWIM regrets discarding his lifetime supply. It was one of the only things that made life quite enjoyable. SWIM thinks if he had it again he would force strict moderation on himself.

Anyone else in these waters?

[dave-o]

I'm going to sound like some cheesy self-help guru, but:

Learn to love life as it is, and then add Ketamine for a bit of spice.

If K is the only great thing in your life then you are not making enough effort to add other things! I mean, K is just a substance, a way to access your inner thoughts. It's not something that one's life should be based on.

[420massacre]

maybe the one's life isnt worth to his/her standards? so they're on it 24/7

[humdroid]

Y once had a source for the odd gram of K here and there.

Y used to use little bumps, say on a weekly basis, so always had a 'tiny-stock' in.
This meant that Y was in the knowledge, anytime he wanted to get into a certain headspace (not a khole) he would have a bump or two.

Even though Y never used frequently, when he ran out and couldnt restock, he panicked.
This told him, that for him, K is an acutely psychologcialy compulsive drug.

The supply never did come back.

Y got thoughts about K long after the supply stopped.
Y feels that had, he been afforded a constant and abundant supply, K would have sucked Y in.
Y compares normal waking consciousness (NWC) to psychological blindness, compared to K, but knows that (NWC)is what it has to be, in the main, and altered states, saved for special times.

(NWC) is very constrictive and is a fertile breeding ground for massive anxiety and depression in Y.

As for K, Y is glad he tried it, but also, (he thinks) glad its not here now.