Trying to change life, Ignorant family, please advise

[naughtypinkKitty]

SWIM will try to make this as short as swim is able to.
Swim is a 30 y/o female and 5 months ago told swim's family that swim needed help. Swim hasn't dealt with any issues, experiences, thoughts, etc from swim's youth and of course by now the locked closet in the back of swims mind is so over full it barely shuts. Swim should mention that swim ran away from home at 12 because swim's parents were hard core meth addicts and schizo, way worse than swim has ever been but they had 4 kids and swim has none. They are clean now but seem to have completely forgot who they were and how bad they got. Much of the youth issues never dealt with are because of their destructive ways. Selective memory is a trip!
Swim has been trying to be very honest with swim's self, situation, and taking full responsibility for swim's actions- not putting blame on anyone. Swim has done a lot of research over the past year or so about addictions, over coming them, different effective ways to overcome them, nutrition, holistic and spiritual healing, energy healing, quantum level research, ayurveda healing, etc and feels very knowledgeable about what needs to happen to change swims life.
Swim also knows that swim can't do it alone and it will never work if swim stays in the same environment surrounded by the same people. Swim is not the type of girl to blend in, being 6'1" tall swim tends to always get much more attention than swim wants so basically swim isn't able to recreate swim's self if swim stays here.
Anyway, prior to reaching out to swim's family- being honest about having a problem with drugs, that is ultimately keeping swim from fixing the deeper issues. None of swims family had any idea that swim ever did drugs let alone had a problem!
Swim has never been a conventional or typical type of person and "hitting bottom" is not swims style, there was never an "intervention" which might be why swims family has reacted the way they did.
Swim just want to change before swims life gets to that point.

Now that the secret is out and they know...Swim does drugs! *gasp! oh dear god!* They can't trust me in their homes!! chain down their tvs swim might steal it--sell it for crack and shoot it up!
Swim has never stolen from them before and they never had a reason to distrust swim. Swim has been high for a long time-many years!- suddenly now they have that swim was honest swim is now a criminal!

Swims family tells swim that they will help after swim goes to a 30 day detox inpatient first! Swim doesn't do heroin. Swim doesn't think it matters what someones DOC is if it is keeping them from dealing with the reality of someones life. Swim has personally used things from sugar/food to sex to various legal and illegal substances to avoid swims reality.

Nobody has any money to send swim to a rehab for 30 days and since it is the only other option they insist on making swim go to the state funded place that they send the homeless, mental patients, or petty criminals that usually don't really want to quit just stay out of jail.
Another thing, swim will probably know a lot of the people that would be in and out of there. Reconnecting with them is the last thing swim would want to do right now, and state funded anything is not known for being holistic and nutritionally focused. Swim also does not want to be diagnosed with something only to be put on a different drug, swim desires a truly clean existence and believes that any mental problem can be cured by nutrition.
Swim has always found the idea of NA or AA backwards, sitting around with other current/former partiers reminiscing about the (good) old days would make anyone want to jump back into the game. With a 5% success rate swim cant see why it is the only "proven effective" way to quit. The research done on nutritional addiction treatments and acupuncture/acupressure have a 70% to 80% recovery, but it is considered "alternative". Try telling that to swims family...like talking to a brick wall
Swim has been going around and around with swims entire family for 5 months about this getting absolutely nowhere. Honestly, swim is shocked swim is actually still trying to do it...or even speaking to swims family at all! Swim just wishes swim was never honest with them in the beginning, who ever said honesty is the best policy should be shot!.

Swim feels like this detox thing is for them so their hands are washed clean of the entire thing, they would have "helped" swim in their minds without ever having to do a thing. How can swim express to them that this is not about them! Swims family got out of taking care of swim as a kid because they were unfit to do it, and now that swim is an adult and needs help they are pawning swim off to the state. Swim feels like swim might as well become a criminal if they are making swim detox with criminals.
Swims life has literally been on hold for like 6 months now, not wanting to get a job and established only to (hopefully) leave the area. Haven't had money, job, home (staying with boyfriend?/friend?) in so long! Swim almost want to say F*ck them all and join a buddhist monastary or devote swims life to the freedoms of other countries (other then the US) but in the state of mind swim is in right now swim probably wont think things through enough. Regardless swim is about to lose swims mind!

Thanks for reading this
Any advice would be amazing!