Opinions - SWIM prolly shouldn't. But wants to roll again.

[reptile]

Swim has taken xtc a total of 5 or 6 times.
Not spaced out. At the most once a week. At the least once every 2 or 3 weeks.
After rollin swim usually feels REALLY good after the crash. Like half rolling. Happy for no reason. Then like a week after INTENSE CRASH. Like so so depressed.
SWIM noticed lexapro kinda canceled out the effects once swim started feelin really low. But when SWIM wasnt usin it swim was jus incredibly depressed for months n months. Like 3 months of severe depression before it finally wore off.
The first time swim did it was only one pill. N didnt really experience the horrifying depression. Every other roll after that swim took two. to roll BALLS.
Every time after the first swims goal was to be completely out of one's mind ROLLIN FACE.
N fuckin loved it!
But then....severe depression, etc...

SWIM has finally snapped out of it. N back to normal.
Swim's clinically depressed to begin with if this helps at all.

SWIM misses E alot. SWIM doesn't wanna do it so often. Or so much at one time.
From the public's general opinion on this board...does any fishy out there have depression [that they already had in the first place] n figured out a way to roll without making their depression substantially worse?
Would it be a horrible idea for SWIM to just take one pill this time and see how it goes?
If SWIM could only do a low dose very very sparingly?

[Readux]

Once a week is way to often, try to get in 3 months before uses, if not at least get in 1 month. It's ok to roll a week after a previous roll, but continuing the trend will result in a loss of magic.

[Samadhi]

MDMA experiences are best left kept to usage of a month or more inbetween.

the crash is a sad part to the MDMA/ecstasy experiences, it happens to the best and there are certain ways to avoid it that effect in some people. people tend to re-dose throughout a night on pills or MDMA powder to keep the high going and the night rolling, but most of the time, careless redosing can lead to very drawn-out comedowns and increases in the more drastic and annoying physical and mental effects. keeping ones use to a minimum of one re-dose before the three hour mark of the experience at a dose of half the original dosage is the preferred rout for some

also, taking 5-htp at the comedown or before the experience has helped swim not deal with all the subtle nuances of the come-down and the shattering sadness that can follow if not managed right....

but in swiys situation ecstasy may not be the best thing for swiy. there are two rules that swim subscribes to in his substance use

rule one; (adopted from Jdreaming) keep your rent and bills paid

rule two; keep yourself and others with you happy, safe and taking a positive experience that fully outweighs the negatives.

and if swiy has horrible after-effects from ecstasy use, maybe he should take an objective look at his usage and figure out the positives and negatives and weigh them. but if it really makes swiys life the next day feel like hell for a week or so, maybe it isn't for him

hope this helps

[reptile]

yeah last time swim did it was around Nov. 9th

[Readux]

SWIM actually has a few friends with chronic depression try ecstasy, and come out completely different, in a good way. SWIMs friends became basically more happy and overall less focused on the depression. So if SWIY swim thinks he is psychologically ready, 120 mg of mdma sounds ok. Just keep experiences around once every one to three months.

[RaverHippie]

the depression will come after rolling even if it already didn"t exist in swiy before he rolled

the depression WILL be less severe if swiy spaces out the doses like readux suggested

SWIY will pay the price for taking mdma too frequently there is no getting around it so after the upcoming dose wait until atleast april or may