Am I a drug addict?

[Red_Baran]

Heres my question, since i can rember really, i have always liked and seemed to need a way to get fucked up. i've never really got addicted (mentally) to one or the other drug although i've gone through many physical withdrawals (opioids benzos). Every night/day i crave a way to get fucked up. It doesn't seem to mater the way i get fucked up, when i was little i started with dxm then i went to alcohol, then when i moved out of my parents house and my world of drugs exploded to20 plus drugs under my belt, almost a new drug every weekend. If i don't have a way to get fucked up i get really depressed and pissed off and make my self sick (thinking about getting fucked up over and over in my head till it makes me sick to my stomic). So i guess my real question is can you just be addicted to drugs in gen.? I see most people who have drug problems seem to have a drug of choice witch i don't (my favorite being E though but i've only used it 3 times). And so far drugs haven't really hurt my life they have improved it thus far (other then my cash witch is down to $0) before i started the massive drug use i weighed 200lbs and 29% body fat, now im cut and down to 150 and i have new outlooks on the world/life, so is my drug use a problem even though it has seemingly helped me physical and a little mentally? I have SAD, GAD and PD and after taking drugs like E i have been able to over come some of my mental disorders a little bit more. most of this realization came after a really bad trip on shrooms (1/4oz) witch i don't regret it was a massive learning experience. Edited by: Red_Baran

[Hyperreal]

You could try taking a break from getting fucked up. 3-6 months, maybe. Or not, if you don't think there's a problem

[Red_Baran]

ive tryed, but i cant seem to make my self stop...

[Zandorf]

if you nmeed to be altered in order to get through the day, and if you
start hurting seriously for money then i think you do have a problem
and should seek help.



if you want to stop using and you can't without becoming physically ill then you DEFINATELY have a problem.



have you tried physical activity such as frisbee, golf, swimming, etc or
other hobbies that you find rewarding in place of taking
drugs/drinking? I've found that i use a lot less during the
spring and summer because i can play frisbee with my friends and its
always an extremely rewarding experience.



I understand you have a very unique situation on your hands and it
maybe hard to get others to understand if the above doesn't help but
i'm sure NA won't turn you away... perhaps check yourself into a clinic?


Edited by: Zandorf

[motorhead]

The answer to your question is yes, you are an addict. You have suffered physical withdrawls and you are mentally hooked as well. I believe in the concept of 'addictive personality', and i think you are mentally hooked as well although you say not to one particular drug. You are mentally addicted to just being not-sober. A person with an addictive personality can get hooked on junk food. Im not coming down on you or anything, just trying to explain a little bit my view of addiction.


You say your drug use hasnt harmed your life, just improved it. I may be wrong but it sounds like you are fairly young, probably single since you say you recently moved from home. Well when your young with no family(wife, kids, mortgage, etc.) or any major responsibilities, getting fucked up all the time and having no money or food isnt really a big deal. Alot of young people do just that. Someday tho you might want some of these things, and i can safely say that with your present lifestyle getting these things will probably be impossible, let alone maintaining them.


Hey i donno maybe you dont want to get hitched and have a family and all that, it was just one possible scenario i made for example. I do think tho that for anybody that uses drugs as heavily as you do life does eventually throw you a left hook somewhere along the way.

[uqlfy]

It seems to me that maybe your trying escape from something. Maybe yourself? Your past? Your present?

I used to get high daily. Like you it didnt matter much what I used.
Eventually my life got totally fucked. I got off everything for awhile.
Now I still drink, smoke bud once in great while, trip here and there.
But it took me losing a whole lot of people and things in my life to
get where I am. Do yourself a favor and take control while you still
can. It may seem hard now but think how much harder it will get to turn
around if you keep on going.

[insanity]

i can relate to u on wanting to be fucked up on one drug
or another. i've been in this game for 4 years straight
now and in rehab once and it's still the same rules. i
feel like i cant have a good sleep if i hadn't gotten
fucked up on something, or waiting to get fucked up
somehow when i wake up. my life revolves around trying
to get high to escape the miserable life i've made
myself think i have when sober, when in actuality its a
good life and i should appreciate life for what it is,
but i dont. i classify myself as an addict.

[Starfish]

I can totally relate to this. I am both addicted to speed, and addicted
to getting high, on no matter what. While on speed(or similar stuff,
like ritaline) I always have to add on something, like cannabis, pills
or alcohol. I just want to be as fucked up as possible. Just the speed
isnt enough for me. its not the same with my other user friends...they
dont want to spoil it when they are on the speed...they want it to be
pure...