Journal - 13 Days Clean Need Support

[oxynomo]

Swim is into his 13th day w/o swims 110mg oxy.Swim has slept 6 hours in 13 days.Swim still can't stay still,keeps getting chills,skin feels like sandpaper on it.Could these symptoms be from being on the oxy for 7 yrs? Or is swim just running the usual course of w/d? Swim is starting to get kind of depressed.Is there any end of this madness in sight?
Thanks for any uplifting words,
oxynomo

Reputation Comments on this post:

and for relaying your experiences.

[rokman nash]

Its not unusual,at all,these feelings disipate.It seems the older you are the longer it takes to get back to normal. Be patient,and fight through,If swim can secure some Klonopin,it sure helped Dave sleep.Once you can start getting 4-5 hrs a night things will improve dramatically.


good luck,good thoughts

[chillinwill]

Things will definitely get better soon. Just keep up the good work and attitude SWIY has had. It seems like SWIY is over the majority of the physical withdrawal and now this is where the other shit starts. Insomnia is very common for a while and Red Rock found that even though he couldn't sleep much at night, if he could take just short naps here and there, that that really helped him. Some good threads to check out that might help SWIY endure the withdrawal can be found Here.

Never give up hope man and things will get better. Keep us updated on how things are going

[oxynomo]

Thanks Rok,just seemed like wsim made it to this point and stalled.And how are you makin out? Good?You gotta be really tough to stop the shit..
ox

[rokman nash]

Exercize as much as your able,and drink tons of water.Dick (richard smoker) has a great thread on PAWS(post acute withdrawl snydrome),with lots of great info that will benefit you now.Check it out and PM if Dave can help.

good thoughts

[Dickon]

Well day 13 was always going to be the bitch! It's something to do with the last supper! So get through today and you will be happy as the proverbial Larry.

Seriously though, you should be getting towards the end of the acute phase. It will take quite a few more weeks to be 1st-order OK, and after that there will be months of brain-chemistry rebalancing, and life rebuilding, but that can be fun.

I'm just coming up to 90 days away, and as my cat gave up methadone which is longer acting, it's taken a while for him to really strut his funky stuff, but it's happening. I was surprised how long the process has taken compared to previous efforts, but as Dave says, it might well be a factor of being somewhat on the older side.

I was always skeptical about PAWS (Post-Acute Withdrawal Symptoms), except it seems my cat has them [or rather did!!! (Call the RSPCA!)]. [I can't miss this opportunity to tell the story of my 22 month old son here, who does a fair job of beginning the Hamlet soliloquy "to be or not to be...", missing out a bit he gets down to ".... (shuffled off this mortal coil) must give us pause", and then he adds, ad libing from the original Shakespeare "the cat's got paws". I shall never see "the Dane" in the same light again!]

The advice about exercise is good, but I'd add a caveat. Go easy. If you're body is simply saying no, then listen. About 21 days in I decided to go swimming and did so for 3 days. On the third day I pushed myself a bit more, and I think that contributed to me getting ill and I had to spend 2 months as a virtual couch potato. I was very good, and didn't force myself, which I feel was the right thing to have done, and this last week I've finally got up and exercised. It feels like things are finally starting to slot together, but there can be a frenetic desire to sort everything out all at once, and grab life by both hands. This is a brilliant feeling, but temper it with a bit of realism to avoid possible frustration when and if the pace starts to drop off, or a bad patch hits.

Be patient, hang in there, and I promise you it will be worth it. Yep, I know the sleep deprivation is a bitch, but 5 minutes is better than none, quarter of an hour, an hour, two, three, five hours better still. I'm not sure the klonopin would be useful at this stage, as ideally you want your body to adjust to drug free sleep. But that's a small detail. You could try some chamomile tea, and use something stronger as a last resort.

Honestly, it doesn't matter one flying fuck how you see your way through a withdrawal. It isn't figure skating where one's trying to get marks for artistic achievement and technical merit, it's a brawl. Either you or the monkey wins. There are no rules. Make sure it's you that wins, and fight dirty if need be!

Good luck

Dickon

[Robbo]

Just wanted to say good luck and well done, when swim did there detox before they didnt think there was an end in sight and like you say the not sleeping was the worst but as said even if it is just short bursts here n there, that is better than nothing.

It was the boredom that got to swim, lying awake in bed all nite not sleepin seriously got swim down, instead of just lying there get up put a dvd on, or read anything to take your mind off it! You are probably already doing this but just in case .

Are you totally lacking in energy too? God it used to take swim 25 mins to walk to the shop when the shop is 5 mins away lol..

Wishing you luck

[miffy]

Hey - well done! It's great that you've come so far, and with the energy and determination it takes to go as far as you have, you're totally capable of going all the way. . . I know my saying it doesn't really help, but the sleep problems will get better. . . it can be horrific at the time - I know - but it really will improve.

All the best to you!

[Morpheous]

Originally Posted by oxynomo

Swim is into his 13th day w/o swims 110mg oxy.Swim has slept 6 hours in 13 days.Swim still can't stay still,keeps getting chills,skin feels like sandpaper on it.Could these symptoms be from being on the oxy for 7 yrs? Or is swim just running the usual course of w/d? Swim is starting to get kind of depressed.Is there any end of this madness in sight?
Thanks for any uplifting words,
oxynomo

Is this the first time you've ever detoxed??? if so.... fairplay to u mate! the first time i detoxed i didnt last 13 days so i really do hold my hand out to u......

You're at a difficult stage now, all the physical wd symtoms should have gone by now, the rest and IMHO the worst are the mental wd's so my advice to u mate...... just keep yourself busy! try and get as much exercise as possible, i know u probably don't feel like it but trust me you'll feel better for it and sleep better aswell. Also something I always do is disassociate myself from my (so - called) friends that use, probably an obvious thing to do but, again..... their mindset is completely different and at the end of the day, they'll keep a look out for u and hopefully u wont wanna slip back into it!!!

Anyways, my dinners gettin cold, so take care mate and stay STRONG!!!! and congrats!!! with u all the way!!!

[wonky]

So congrats to SWIY on 21 days, SWIM thinks that is terrific. It takes alot to keep going day in and day out, and SWIM knows how long the days can be without sleep. SWIY is getting better everyday, especially compared to SWIY'S first post. SWIM also gets alot of support and positive vibes from DF, from reading and posting. SWIM is still tapering. SWIY is doing really good.

[oxynomo]

Yes first and last time detoxing.Would'nt wish that on worst enemy.Swim was suppose to do this on a taper so docs could change meds. to another narcotic.Swim started taper then decided no more meds ,have to deal with pain,spine .discs,stenosis.Anyway sounds like Wonky can follow directions[taper]swim could'nt.Good luck with it. thanks again

[oxynomo]

28 days no oxy.Swim still basicly feels like shit.Very little sleep.no energy,pain everywhere.Swim never felt like this with his opiates up to his ears.swim now wondering if he made right decision getting off the shit.Too late now,can't go back.Can't let oneself forget those first 4-5 days of w/d,like a horror flick.Should be enough to stay off even though swim makes poor calls.Swim trying to stay positive but

[Dickon]

28 days, that's a huge achievement! Don't get overly worried about the sleep or the energy. They'll come. Frankly I'm surprised you're getting little sleep at this point coming off oxycodone. What exactly does "very little" sleep mean? I'm not sure if you're talking 5 minutes a night (which would be extraordinary) or you're talking 5-6 hours a night (which would be normal), or somewhere in between.

Stay positive, because you will be feeling infinitely better soon. Make sure you're doing the obvious things, ideally having hot baths (which will be good for the organic pain too I think), eating properly (again, don't worry if you've not got the energy for this, just try and get as good nutrition as you can), and looking after yourself.

As far as the lethargy goes, my cat made gradual improvements, but only really felt this lift after about 3 months, and even now, it's not entirely gone. One way to look at this which I came across is that the lethargy is actually a part of the bodies natural healing and should be embraced. The lethargy is one aspect of PAWS (post acute withdrawal syndrome), and you'll probably be suffering with mood swings (emotional lability, if you want to sound pompous!) too for quite a few months. The good aspect of this is that you might get real highs as well as lows, but try to ride the roller-coaster, and embrace the experience.

As you say, 28 days in is no picnic (not that it can't be for some), but it's a damn sight better than the first week! Put on your determination armour, and keep on fighting. You won't regret it, I promise!

The pain will improve, but it will take time. I had really bad back pain, that I'm sure was made infinitely worse by the lack of natural endorphins. If you're up to it some walking, or other light exercise can be a godsend, and can really lift the mood.

All the best

Dickon

[oxynomo]

Little sleep meaning 1-2 hours a day .One question about your thread with all the vitamins&minerals.Swims been on almost the same except for the RX drugs.Should swim still be taking the large doses or maybe scale back a little?Also swim really enjoys swiys literary prowess.Thanks alot ,keeps swim inline. O

[EyesOfTheWorld]

low energy levels can be attributed to no sleep. but if swiy wants to sleep they need to get in some physical activity during the day/evening..........during one of swim's most recent kicks (pods and hydro) he forced himself to take a 30 minute walk, every day, rain, sleet, hail, snow. Nothing drastic at first, no gym or heavy lifting, just get out and move around as hard a it may be

[infekt]

hey oxynomo, congratulations on getting clean Sleep may be a problem for awhile, well from swim's experience. Eyesoftheworld had good advice about physical activity. Walking is great, though swim would also have to add stretching. Yoga helps swim out a lot, he always feels great after doing some Yoga. It calms down the nerves a lot, as well as the mind. Try it out sometime, nothing too difficult or taxing, just some simple stretches and breathing. Also, drink lots of water! The vitamins were also a good idea.

[oxynomo]

Swim knows exercise may help,but right now can't do much as swims dufuss dog showed swim a real quick way to get down a flight of stairs last Sun.Before wsim started the long oxy binge always exercised and knows the benefits.Till swim can move freely gonna have to stick this one out.Thanks for responces

[AvidFan]

Sorry to hear about the dufus dog - sounds like a dog in a film they just made called Marley or something.

Keep up the good work - SWIY is doing really good, keep us informed of progress

[oxynomo]

Well today Feb.6 swim is at 30fukn5 days no opiates at all!Swim is really feeling great.All of swims senses seem to be alive.Totally amazed how screwed up[numb]they were.At one point couldn't touch cold water.Swim was out to dinner with his mother and brothers plus their wives.Swim recvd.compliments on looking good.No one except swims wife knows about swims addiction or getting clean.Swim never thought he looked shitty.Guess thats cause the dope was doing the thinking not swim.Swim just came from Philly auto show,lots of people.Other swim would have opted to stay home to cook brains.Swim still gets very little sleep,sucks but is getting used to it.Didn't Ben Franklin sleep only 3hrs. and said sleep was a waste of time.Any how,swim just had to say hes doin goood and thanks all.

[AvidFan]

Glad to hear SWIY is still doing well.

For X, the sleep took well over a month to come back to some kind of normality - but it does come back when your body accepts there will be no more drugs to regulate its cycles for it - could be sooner or later but hang in there

[oxynomo]

Day 42,still stayin off the shit.Swim thinks about it alot,and finally come to the conclusion that he is just a plain old doper.Swim goes to doc to get any thing to help him sleep,gets script for lunesta 1 a day 30 days.So swimhole kills script in 8 days.WTF after what swim just went through with the oxy dumb fuck just can't control self with any meds.Swim had a week of some drug induced sleep,not long lasting like the oxy sleep,but some.Now looks like little or none again,thats how swim gets taught his lessons[hard way]Maybe swim needs a shrink to help him find out why he needs to be fkdup all the time?Hmmmmm ,more meds?Other than that last screw up swim is still 6 weeks no oxy though not drug free.Anyhow thanks for listening and
Happy Valentines Day o

[AvidFan]

Had to work it out, but looks like X is on day 71, though he counts in months now!

Sleep will come, but try not to regulate it with other drugs it will stop the natural patterns getting back to normal. Know it's tough as have gone through it.

As for seeing a shrink or something, that's not a bad idea - X is seeing a therapist now and hoping to work through a lot of stuff (he has plenty of shit on top of his addictive past to deal with at the moment) - any help you can avail yourself is worth a shot, sometimes just getting it all clear, identifying triggers and thought processes, etc, is a big help - and they will point things out you might never have realised yourself (lightbulb moments!). Of course depends on the type of therapy - Cognitive Behaviourial Therapy is very popular in UK (main type of therapy the NHS gives people) so it depends on whether you want a quick "fix" (pun intended) or want to explore root causes more, but its definitely worth thinking about.

Good luck

[neborecovery]

Originally Posted by oxynomo

Day 42,still stayin off the shit.Swim thinks about it alot,and finally come to the conclusion that he is just a plain old doper.Swim goes to doc to get any thing to help him sleep,gets script for lunesta 1 a day 30 days.So swimhole kills script in 8 days.WTF after what swim just went through with the oxy dumb fuck just can't control self with any meds.Swim had a week of some drug induced sleep,not long lasting like the oxy sleep,but some.Now looks like little or none again,thats how swim gets taught his lessons[hard way]Maybe swim needs a shrink to help him find out why he needs to be fkdup all the time?Hmmmmm ,more meds?Other than that last screw up swim is still 6 weeks no oxy though not drug free.Anyhow thanks for listening and
Happy Valentines Day o

Eek, that Lunesta Taste! Swim had to throw those things down my throat. Hang in there the Oxy was tuff for Swim to quit. Swim took Soma: helped with muscle pain, I slept better, and since Swim on drug court they did not test for it. Swim wishes Swiy luck. Swim did it, so can be done.

[mbk00]

Swiy remembers feeling those PAWS as they call them in rehab (Post Acute Withdrawal Symptoms) allthough they aren't terribly painful (swiy knows the insomnia is hell, i slept an hour a night for 2 and a half weeks), do what is told for you. Beleive me swiy hates exercising but the day swiy ran 2 laps swiy felt 200% better no joke. The aches and chills will go away man, unfourtanetly no addict likes to hear this "it takes time". The time will be more rewarding then using again, so keep your head up !

[oxynomo]

Swim says thanks X and mbkOO for replys.On the therapy thing swim is finding it hard to admit to himself that he probably needs help.Swim is very hard headed[always been a problem].On the exercise part,swims gotta get back to it,as swim is starting to carry some extra baggage but can't get his ass in gear.Swim just can't believe how the shit fucked his head.Swim knows he would not of made it this far without the help hes gotten here. Thanks again o