Ayahuasca experiences

[LittleGirl]

I found this person'sexperience quite interesting.
<H2>My first ayahuasca experiences</H2>


This is an account I wrote some years ago, long before the present project. I include it for interest and also because it is the only bit of 'finished' writing on this subject.


Some years ago, a friend working with the rain forest people in South America returned with incredible stories of being given a magical potion deep in the Amazonian jungle. It was made from the bark of a vine combined with another plant, yet the plants had no effect when taken separately. It was used by some tribes as a rite of passage for young men to learn about the jungle, because each living thing could be seen with absolute clarity. Later, I read in PIHKAL that the anthropologist and psychiatrist, Claudio Naranjo, had explored the drug with many people, and each one had seen jaguars and other jungle beasts. He speculated that the plants that made up the potion absorbed the spirits of the jungle fauna, and that these were released in the minds of those who drank it. Incredible! I resisted the temptation to take the first plane out to Rio and, over the years, forgot all about it.
<H3>The Shaman</H3>


Then I met someone who told me that the very same magic was now available in the comfort of your own home. I said I was interested. Soon I was visited by René and his girlfriend Lulu. René had, he said, spent 12 years in the Amazonian jungle with the Indians, which was especially impressive since he looked about 30. Lulu had been a model and was still glamorous; the pair gave workshops in Tantric Yoga. René looked a bit of a guru with long wispy hair and beard, and explained that he was now ready to "take me on the journey" after his long apprenticeship with shamans. It was as though Don Juan himself had walked through my door and offered me the ultimate experience. For $400. A bit steep, I thought. But they pointed out that it was only $150 each plus $100 for the materials and they would have to spend a day in preparation beforehand besides both attending me throughout the 10-hour 'journey'. They were not in it for the money but to spread the knowledge, and I was chosen as one of the few worthy to embark on this great journey; others had been turned away. Although my cynical mind drew parallels with encyclopaedia salesmen, I felt that it may be unwise to say anything which could sour my relationship with someone to whom I was about to give complete power over myself, so I agreed. After all, this was to be the experience of a lifetime. It was set to happen in a week's time, and meanwhile I was to prepare myself with a cleansing diet.


As the day approached, I anticipated a real adventure. It was after all not just a trip but a journey, or was that a good bit of marketing to justify the price? I was convinced that René knew the drug well and was experienced in administering it, even though I was frankly not sold on him as a shaman. After all, I enjoyed the Don Juan books even though I believed he was Castaneda's fabrication, and being at home, I would feel secure. The diet, however, smacked of rich Californians rather than the jungle ("Fresh spring water bottled in glass") so I ignored it and ate salads instead.
<H3>Taking the piss</H3>


Finally, the great day came. They were due at 7pm, but at 5 René phoned from the motorway to say they were running late and could I please come to their place instead since they had everything ready there. Not wanting to cross my guide, I reluctantly agreed.


When I arrived, Lulu announced that she was tired so would I please excuse her going off to bed, and I went along with that too even though René accepted full payment: this was not the time for conflict. René took me to a small room lit by a single candle, heavy with incense and new age music (not my favourite at that time). He told me to prepare by looking at a book on Ayahuasca while he made the final preparations in the kitchen. At random I read: ". . . the vine can give you the power of a magical king; yet it will kill those who dare to take it without the proper dietary preparations." Not what I wanted to hear!


René came back with a full litre plastic bottle and told me the ritual was to drink it all down, then piss into a plastic jug and drink my urine. He said I'd "feel the energy rise" in about 20 minutes; meanwhile he prepared me with tales of his first experience when the shaman told him Ayahuasca would either kill him or cure him. He then went on about the revolution coming and the days of the rich being numbered. As one of the few people in the world rich enough to blow $400 on a night's entertainment, I was not in a receptive mood. Finally I could take no more and dared to tell him to shut up.


I lay on my back with a blindfold while René gave me a nice massage, first my shoulders and then my feet. But even after an hour I saw no visions; instead my head was buzzing with internal dialogue about being taken for a ride rather than on a journey, and the 'ritual' of taking the piss was to save René the expense of providing the full dose. But here I was, I must simply make the best of it, so I lay back and tried to let go of my annoyance and yield to the drug.


Then it started. I gradually realised that the music was not only beautiful but looked beautiful too, in fact it was exquisite. Each plucked string was a glinting drop of gold landing in a lake of gleaming liquid silver, and yet the gold and silver was also solid in the form of great slabs which showed the strength of the music, while shimmering with knowledge of the melody. The music changed to orchestral, and I experienced this as geometric patterns of incredible complexity made up of triangles and hexagons of intense prismatic colours which changed constantly while undulating in a symmetrical way. It was as though superimposed on vast flags waving in slow motion, yet an underlying rhythm was provided by the flowing movement being punctuated by a series of 'fixed frame' steps.
<H3>Jaguars?</H3>


The next change of music broke the spell, so I asked for silence. There was plenty going on and I felt like exploring. I realised that, without music, the imagery was slightly plastic, although it appeared strong, in that I could 'push' it in a particular direction. The pretty patterns were on the surface, but I could allow other aspects to rise up and be seen . . . jaguars? No, but menacing forms were in there alright. Yet the scene lacked conviction: it was like watching a movie of a psychedelic experience. It was without emotional content and was somewhat unsatisfying. After a while, I decided to tell René what was going on and ask for his reassurance before delving deeper and facing any demons that might be lurking. But when I called him there was no response. I took off my blindfold and sat up; he wasn't there. A door was open into another room, so I called again but no reply. He'd gone to sleep with Lulu!


Sitting up with wide open eyes, all images were gone. I just felt badly treated, tired and wanted to be out of that claustrophobic room and safely home. But I was trapped in this ridiculous situation and waited, miserably, until Lulu passed through on her way to the lavatory, when I got her to wake René. I told him that, although the imagery had been pretty, the experience was superficial and that I had an uncomfortable feeling, a knot in my belly. His response was to relate my problem to a childhood or pre-birth trauma which he tried to get me to re-live. I told him that that wasn't appropriate, the feeling was not normally there and anyway the situation was wrong for deep psychotherapy as I didn't know or trust him well enough. I simply wanted to get out of this uncomfortable feeling and make the best of the trip. René's answer was Ketamine. He said it would lift me out into a new space. Well, this was tempting as Ketamine was something I'd intended to try one day. Yet doing it now, feeling bad like this . . . surely no. I played safe by snorting half of what he offered which had virtually no effect; just as well, as afterwards I learned that snorting Ketamine produced unpredictable effects at the best of times and in that situation was a recipe for almost certain disaster. An hour or so later the effect was wearing off, so I got a taxi home.


Second attempt I wrote a letter of complaint and René rang as soon as he got it. He apologised and agreed I had had a poor deal, and offered to give me another session. I wasn't too sure about that in case it was a repeat performance so instead agreed he would just provide the material, enough for myself and Ulla, a co-explorer who was dying to try ayahuasca but couldn't afford René's price.


René gave me a smaller amount than I had consumed on my own, adding that it "had plenty of the vine but was a bit short on tryptamines", and suggested we add 4 grams of dried magic mushrooms, which we did. It looked and tasted awful (the bits of rotting vegetation in it had clearly fermented making the plastic bottle bulge) but we mixed in the mushrooms and forced it down. Ulla soon vomited and felt better but I managed to keep it down by lying very still. It hit Ulla first. She was overwhelmed, looking round and exploring the surroundings in their new charm, and reporting back to me. For me it came on later and gradually, and in a different, internal, way. I felt giddy and nauseous when I moved, so I lay rock still with eyes closed. I could float into the music as before, but more freely. I didn't feel like speaking, and found Ulla's observations and analysis interrupted my appreciation of the most incredibly opulent performance. Sometimes it was of geometric patterns, at others I was flowing through undulating shell-like shapes that gleamed like mother of pearl. At other times the forms were animate, but there was no hint of threat anywhere.
<H3>Exquisite</H3>


Although I knew I could manifest any vision I desired, I was so completely content that I had no need to. This time I was not just an observer, I flowed too as part of the scene, I did not need to describe it to myself. Then I had an insight: it is the mental activity of observation and description that separates us from direct experience, and, without internal dialogue experience is far more poignant. The record was on repeat, but it was just as fresh each time and even improved with the listening, even though it was the kind of New Age music I previously despised. The imagery was poignant and exquisite, and curled up on the floor with Ulla I felt able to open up my heart and enjoy it to the full; though we were having separate experiences we shared each other's joy, sometimes cuddling and once or twice arousing each other erotically. I observed that there was none of the normal empathy; I was conscious that the pleasure of my touch was entirely within myself regardless of any response from Ulla. This lead to an insight: I saw how I had become so used to identifying with my sexual partner's pleasure and relying on her response that I had lost sexual spontaneity, and that in fact being sexually selfish meant being more erotic. I kept quiet except for occasional exclamations of bliss, and I remember saying that it was one of the happiest days of my life; Ulla said my face showed it.
<H3>Affirmation</H3>


When I got up to piss I felt awful, like being very drunk. I felt nauseous and just wanted to lie down, close my eyes and sink into that other world. Yet Ulla spent her time moving about with eyes open enjoying the world in a new light. Later on I found I could move my hands "within" the music and touch Ulla so delicately that it felt as though only one molecule connected us. She was not my lover yet I felt great affection for her: we fitted together with complete harmony, yet there was no expectation or longing for anything more.


I could see that my life was at a peak, I was happy and fulfilled and surrounded by more loving friends than ever before. I even saw my business (a walk-in DTP studio) with great affection, with all those people working on their separate but noble projects. I was making an assessment of my life, and I received affirmation. After five or six hours the effect waned and I saw the funny side of everything. We both laughed freely and discussed our experiences. I thought it was quite different to the Acid experiences of the past, but Ulla thought the different experience may simply be due to us now being mature.


Though we agreed that Ecstasy is our favourite drug, this was, as Ulla put it, a celebration. Next day my tiredness reflected lost sleep, but no worse, and I felt strengthened in the knowledge that I was on the right road.


Nicholas Saunders 1993


Edited by: Alfa

[dmax]

SWIM will be trying ayahuasca for the first time sometime soon.
Very exciting, as SWIM has never gotten strong visuals out of
anything. Not even LSD, which is supposed to be very
visual. Anything that SWIM should keep in mind before doing
this? Heard that it is rather intense...

[lilsteve]

Be sure to keep in mind the foods you need to avoid for 24 hours
afterwards. I took it and had a measly three mozerella sticks, and the
next day had quite</span> a
headache. Also, maybe take some tums or pepto-bismol before dosing,
because although it's not as bad as most people say, the taste isn't
pleasant. Another good thing is to find a digeridoo and fuck around
with that a little bit

[raven3davis]

Definitely take something that will recude the nausea. I have
never gotten ayahuasca to work because I always puke it up. I
would also recommend boiling the ayahuasca down so you don't have to
drink so much of it. You should probably have a trip sitter and
make sure you are in a good setting with the right mind set.

[dmax]

Holy shit, I took too much. When I rebuild my psyche, I'll post
something about it. Regardless, I'm now not sure whether there is
a god, or whether I am god. Also, It's NOT ANY FUN playing
god. I spent a while designing marine mammals. I'll try to
piece something longer and more coherent together when I have more time.

[dmax]

Hey. Sorry I took so long with this. I still need to edit the report (I'm probly gonna send it to erowid) but I'm already running late. (School takes time). here we go:


Forts, points, backwards bits.
As an experienced psychonaut, I've heard of most drugs. I learned of the existence of Ayahuasca early on in my travels. Some of my friends acquired the materials necessary for preperation over the internet, but, for some reason, years went by and no one tried it. I had been in sort of a psychedelic slump, having taken enough of every drug I was fond of to have become bored with them, and was looking for something new. In addition, DMT was still on my list of things to try. I realized that it would be simple for me to get ahold of some, since my friends had the preperations, but were merely too lazy or too forgetful to make it. I asked G. to prepare the ayahusaca for the cominng four day weekend. He said that he would do it on Sunday, and so I would be able to try it Sunday night.


Sunday evening rolled around, and he began the preperations. They are, in our crazy modern world, so simple a child could do it. One ounce of Mimosa Hostillis bark was ground up in a coffee grinder, as well as a few grams of Syrian Rue seeds. The powders were combined in a pot of water, and he squirted in “a bunch” of lemon juice. This was boiled for 30 minutes, then the liquid was poured off into another pot, and the process was repeated twice more. The final product was a murky brownish liquid that was slightly thick. Most people would have chosen to boil it down, so as to concentrate the foul mixture in a few mouthfuls, but I was feeling impatient (not a good idea). The mixture was put aside and allowed to cool, while I got some things ready for my evening.


I got a bong, some weed, a bottle of water, and a DVD of music videos from the label “Ninja Tune” to watch while I was tripping. A group of people gathered in G's room in order to watch the DVD, but none of them wanted to take the ayahuasca except me. I sat down on the floor in front of the television, and smoked two hits of weed in order to calm myself down. I had heard there was a strong nausea associated with ayahuasca, so I was hoping to avoid vomitting. In retrospect, if I had prepared myself for the vomitting instead of fighting it so hard, I may have had a better time. After smoking, I poured a little over 1/3 of the brew into a mug, and got ready to drink it. The most curious thing about it was that it tasted exactly like vomit. I thought to myself, “this won't be any different coming up than going down”. Several minutes after swallowing the awful mixture, I began to feel funny.


The come up didn't feel exactly similar to any other drug I had taken. There was a small amount of nausea at the onset, and then it passed, and I could feel myself beginning to trip. The music videos I was watching started to influence my thoughts and feelings much more than they had been. Certain tracks seemed threatening, and I wondered why musicians made such angry music. I concluded that they were disturbed, and made a note not to meet them in person. Eventually, one of the videos (something about a robot running away from other robots) started to really irritate me. It seemed like a statement on the flight or fight response, and was trying to appeal to my flight. I didn't really find it interesting or cool. Who finds running away cool?


At this point, I realized I had to pee, so I got up, and went out the door. I had recently been reading science fiction books about space, so as soon as I left the room, I thought I was on the moon. I said out loud, “A space mission? Are you kidding me?” and started laughing to myself. I reached the bathroom, although I found it difficult to walk in the starnge environment that used to be a familiar hallway. Entering, I locked the door, since that was my instinct on entering a bathroom. Then things got very, very intense.


I tried to pee, but after unbuttoning my pants, I lost complete control of my body. I fell onto my knees, and started vomitting uncontrollably. After a few minutes of thrashing around on the floor, vomitting and feeling ill, I finally stopped. At this point, I realized that I had a job to do. I had to experience every possible portion of the creation of the universe. I was terrified. My feeble human brain/soul worked through the scenarios so slowly that I was convinced I would spend an eternity lying on the floor in my own vomit. Intermittently, I found myself back in reality after babbling incoherently and trying to reconstruct the universe in my head. I yelled, “I don't want to do this!” but whatever force was driving me didn't listen.


Several eternities later, I found that I was still completely imobile on the floor of the bathroom. I was looking up at the ceiling from underneath a toilet. I was physically uncomfortable, and feeling cold. I knew I had to get out of that situation. I tried desperately to think of a way to reverse time. If I was understanding the universe so well, maybe I could exert control over time, then? As it turns out, I couldn't. Time was progressing happily along, ignoring me and my stupid self. I phased into another extended experience, moving through different numbers of dimensions, while in the background, people talked frankly about their feelings and philosophies. If I could recall some of the things people said, I would be ecstatic, as I recall some very wise things going through my head.


Problems of philosophy took on terrifying immediacy. Was there an objective morality? Was I God? Why would God let this happen? If I was understanding the universe so well, was there a responsibility I had to others? I was plagued with doubt. I wasn't sure whether there was a God, or whether I was just some tiny part of God, or whether, for just a few hours, I was all of God. Looking back, I'm pretty sure God doesn't hang out on bathroom floors covered in vomit, but then, who's to say? I remember deciding that there was a concept of good and bad, when I screamed, “I DON'T LIKE THAT.” in order to stop some of the voices in my head from creating pieces of the universe that shouldn't be created. Later, someone pointed out that I wasn't God. To them, I think they were merely reminding me to stop being egotistical, but my interpretation made me feel a little better: I was allowed to play god for a short time, but I didn't have the capacity to do it right. It takes a real God to do what I tried to, so no wonder I crashed and burned.


Back in the bathroom, I phased back into reality for a short while. I looked up at the ceiling, past the toilet, and remembered that DMT was supposed to produce wonderful visuals. I willed my surroundings to become a tropical paradise. I willed them to do anything, but there was no way for me to change the visual distortion using just my own willpower. I was livid. I took this drug because it was supposed to be the most visual of anything, but here I was, cold, dirty, uncomfortable, unable to move, but still no visuals. I thought about ways to help my situation. I shouted for help. I could hear people walking by in the hallway occasionally. They even knocked on the door. However, I was unable to communicate with them at all. G said, “are you alright?” I yelled his name, but he didn't seem to hear me. Then he left.


I became depressed. I knew already that I was not significantly at risk. The drug was very safe, and I had eaten no foods containing tyramine for the 24 hours before I ingested the MAOI. So I would not die, although at some points, I wondered why life was worth living if I had to experience these terrible sensations. I tried to die. I screamed, “please let me die!” Nothing happened. Then I closed my eyes, and tried to pass out. I thought perhaps it would be possible to lose conciousness. It would not come. I was an infintesmally small portion of the way through eternity, with almost eternity to go, and I was not liking it.


(aside: I feel now, that the reason I could not lose conciousness is that I already had, in some sense. DMT is a naturally occuring neurotransmitter, and is released in active doses when we sleep. What this meant for me was that I was already as “asleep” as I was going to get. I was having the most powerful and strange dream that one could concieve of, and it may or may not have been a nightmare!)


Then I phased out and was in dimensionland again. I wrestled for as long as I can remember with the concept of numbers. I finally understood the number one. I was trying to build up my understanding of the universe from scratch, and I needed a number system. I remember yelling about it. “I've got one!” Who has two? Someone had two? I needed two, but someone else had it. One of my friends maybe? Then I realized that my friend J had seven. “J has seven. Who's got four? WHO'S GOT FOUR?” I demanded that someone or something reveal to me who had various numbers, all the while realizing that some people had certain numbers, and forgetting the ones I had already achieved. Numbers started to take on significance, two for couples, and love, three for problems of that nature, 4 for strange situations. Seven had a peculiar significange that I cannot remember at all. The numbers started gaining complexity, and soon I was questioning more than just numbers.


I began twitching and spasming on the floor, trying to sort out right from left. My design for how the universe worked was gaining steam. I rolled around, and moved my body into various configurations in order to determine what they meant. I grew flippers instead of arms, I changed size from tiny to gigantic. I lived my life as a dolphin, and a whale, and everything in between. Then I started designing bodies. I tried to figure out how to put together a person. I recall babbling, “on the left... no? with the under? ok thirteen on the port... port fort” etc. I thought about boats, and compartments, and making boats out of bodies, which tied back into the dolphin/whale thing. Throught this, I was twitching and shaking, and I got a strange sense of how the different sides of my body were controlled by different hemispheres of the brain.


I came back to reality for a brief instant. This time, I was sure that I was suffering health problems. I asked if anyone was there. I asked them to get me a doctor. No one was there, luckily, since getting me to a doctor would have been very bad. After panicking, and then feeling self pity, I was once again distracted by the hallucinations. This time, I started building a mythos out of people I knew. A sort of bizzare creation myth. I knew, for instance, that Nort (a long deceased relative of mine) designed people's hands because he was adept at using screwdrivers. In reality, there is no evidence he was any good with tools, but I was convinced he designed all the portions of the human anatomy that required clever tricks to fit them together. At this point, one of the voices in my head (as voiced by my friend J) complained how so much of science and math and engineering depended on “tricks” or clever little devices rather than a more solid-feeling method. I ranted and raved for a while about someone in the fort. The fort was on the point. I asked the room, “who spent the fornight in the fort on the point?” My yellings took on a very definite pattern “Who did the _?” I ended up genuinely asking “who put the bomp in the bomb-shabomp”, in addition to nonsense like “who ported the port?”


The next portion of the trip in completely indescribable. Instead of phasing out of the trip and back into the bathroom, I phased into the next higher level of trip. Time and Space and Meaning blended into something. I watched the world born and hung out near a lake on a farm in Maine.


When I phased back into my first level of trip, it was time to examine the meaning of terror. Horror movies blended together in my head. I sprouted fangs and became a snake and a vampire. I became a werewolf. I had the urge to kill things, eat people, etc. In the background, some screamed. Then, terrified, “Honey, I got bit...”. What were the ramifications of vampiredom/zombiedom on love? (For a good lesson in love and terror, try Shaun of the Dead. It's even funny, too!) If your loved one was bitten by a zombie, and was going to turn into one, what would you do? I sprouted machine parts, I became part metal, a monster. I started drilling myself, eating myself. I was a zombie, and I was on the lookout for human flesh. Then I stopped. I realized it was stupid. I came to the conclusion that horror movie scenarios don't happen because they're too stupid. There's no room for that bullshit in our already convoluted and delicate world.


I heard a knock on the door. Someone was there. Maybe I could communicate? “Help!” I yelled. They tried the door. “It's locked.” “I can't move” “What do you want us to do?” “I need to stop tripping!” I said. “You will. It will go away on its own,” said the voice. And then abruptly, I could move. And I was cold. I had been lying on the floor of a bathroom covered in vomit for hours. I crawled to the shower, and turned it on. As the heat washed over me, I realized I was no longer tripping. I was somewhat shellshocked from the experience, but the rest of the night was spent cleaning up my mess and generally relaxing.
Edited by: Alfa

Reputation Comments on this post:

	Awsome trip report
	Really nice decription. Made for humorous reading too.
	Fantastic report, cheers

[transit]

Thanks for sharing your experience – quite the
rough ride. </span>SWIM’s opinion with Syrian
Rue is that it benefits from an extraction such as Mankse's Acetic Acid Peganum Harmala Extraction – http://www.erowid.org/plants/syrian_..._rue_extractio n2.shtml</span>

Gets rid
of some of the nasties. </span>

[sunyata]

Sounds like a very heavy experience, you must have gotten a good dose, strange you got no visuals. How did you feel the day after? I once had a nightmarish ayahuascha trip, but the next day I felt totally refreshed, almost extatic that I hadmade it back to the real world. Do you think you will try ayahuascha again, and what would you do different? Thanks for a good report, I enjoyed reading it.


P.S. That vomit-taste comes from the Harmala, I tried ayahuascha with two separate brews, one Mimosa and the other Harmala. The mimosa tasted extremely bitter with a metal-like aftertaste, the Harmala simply tasted like vomit.

[dmax]

I've found that whenever I go to sleep, I start tripping again.
My theory is that the DMT released by my brain (this happens when you
sleep) is kicking in the trip somewhat again. This is a little
unnerving, since I did this on Sunday and I still feel after
effects. When this stops, I'll consider doing it again. My
goal would be to not end up on a bathroom floor. To this end:
start in my room, without a bunch of other people around. Plan
music well. Hang out near a trash can with a towel nearby.

[Voices]

Originally Posted by dmax

I've found that whenever I go to sleep, I start tripping again.

dmax, your ability to describe your experience was incredible. Thank you for taking the time to write that up.

I have also experienced flashback like symptoms from DMT. Like you, I wake up from sleep and feel like I'm tripping. This lasted for about 5-7 days. Not only when i woke up but my dreams were also very DMTesque. The flash back episodes tended to center around 2 and 4 in the morning.

[sunyata]

Do you feel any after effects when you're awake too, or is it just when you're dreaming? Do you remember these dreams, if so I think you should write them down and try to interpret them in some way, just a suggestion though. It sound like your sub-conscious has a message for you, those dreams will probably disappear when you figure out what that message is, or with time.

[Alfa]

Please post your ayahuasca experiences here. Edited by: Alfa

[Mushmarick]

My english is not good!!


I have tryed Ayahusca with different recipes over the years, and had amazing trips. I think you cant even call yage experiences as"trips"because theyare something more, something totally minblowing.


I think that strong yagetrip is the king of psychedelic experiences. Acid cant beat it, infact no other psydrug cant fight in yages league.This story is about my firsttouch with yage...


So, I was a 17 year old drugster with a huge intress to psychedelic drugs. My friends used mostly ganja, alcohol and E'sbut i secretly used stuff likeLSD and shrooms. One night i decided that i'm going to order some Ayahuasca over the net. Yage is illegalinmy countrybut i got my order with no problems. My order was 50g= Psychotria viridis and 50g= Banisteropsis caapi.


I cept the yage incredients in my stash for many weeks. In that time i was living with my parents so i had to wait the right time. Then one day my parents were going to our summercabin over the weekend. I sayd that i dont wanna come with them. They said ok and i was on my way to my first yage journey.


I started to cook my yage immeaditly when my family left. I made the yage from 30g psychotria an 30g of banis. I drank the the "tea" and started to wait the effects.


After 30 minutes i threwed up, i tought that now the whole thing isover and i will not get any effects. Oh boy i was wrong. Right after the incident in bathroom i started to see how the walls were flowing down and the roof was moving in wawes. This wasent so new because i have experienced the same things wit acid. I went to lay in to the couch and started to listen some breakbeat.Right after that ifell in some kind of trance. I feeled super euforia and i was in some kind of jungle world. I could see and feelthe green "trees" taking me in some kind of warm and euforic"hug" and i was one with the world i was in. I didnt feel my body or anything fysical feelings. I was one with the world i was in, there was only the green world, nothing else. I didnt hear the music any more. I was just falling trough the couch in to the"green world"


My tripsitter told me thatat thetime my eyes werehalf way closed and there was only twoblack balls rollin around(my pupills). This stage lasted about 4 hours according to my tripsitter. After this i "woke up" and went outside to have cigarette. The smoke seemed to have a mind of its own. I sayd to the smoke that "whydo you live?" The smoke didnt say anything but it formed a strange symbol in front of my face.


There is alot things i'd like to tell you about the journey, but i justcant say it in english. I have written a finnish trip report from it and its 4 pages long...


Hopefully you fellas and ladyes of drugs-forumcan understand something from this..

[jaguarangel]

My friend's first Aya experience came on 30-40 min. after ingestion. The vine was growing inside and felt euphoric. At one point, wanted to dance but was supposed to stay seated so danced withthe arms. Then the shaman rattled leaves around the body. That is when felt the psychotria viridius (chacruna) a male hawk figure move around the body. After 5 hours was down. No purging, some loose stool.


Second time, very different, purging after 45 min., difficult areas were confronted inmy friend'slife. Down after 5 hours.Edited by: jaguarangel

[Pele]

I just tried ayahuasca for the first time, wore off about 4 hours ago. I didn't get as full of an effect as i could have i feel, but what i did experience was really amazing.
From what i can imagine, it totally deleted my memories and prior beliefs for about 3 hours. All of the aspects of my personality that were environmentally acquired were gone, and i had a completely unbiased consciousness. From there i started trying to make sense of everything, the nature of the mind and why everything is how it is. I didn't visit any other places (jungles or whatever) i was in the same room i drank it in the whole time, but i had a completely re-booted consciousness and was left to make sense of everything. If i closed my eyes, i saw patterns like a kaleidoscope (sp), various patterns moving fluidly.
The thing is, i probably would have had a more intense experience, but man, that stuff is fucking SICK tasting! Literally exactly the same as vomit! argck! So, i ended up not being able to down the last 1/4 of the brew, made from 25g psychotria viridis and 25g banisteriopsis caapi boiled / strained etc.
Its definately something i will try again, no vomiting btw, kept it all down, what i drank of it. its about 4 hours after i came down and i am starting to get a headache, so far the only side effect.
I almost felt like i was seconds away from understanding the nature of being, but i came down before i actually sorted everything out in this new perspective.

When i was nearing the end, i wrote this sentence down almost like it wasn't me actually writing it, the thought just flowed out from my pencil -

The unknown is an unbearably vast stage upon which we are the final show, dancing aimlessly and eternally in our shoes of perception.

[Silence_Inc]

i did aya few weeks ago for the first time ... together with 23 other travllers 1 wonderfull loving Sjaman and 3 helpers.

hard to discribe ... i really dived into my darkside - i looked at my fears - and even had some moments that only death seemed like the only way out ... i was standing at the edge of reason but just didn't let go ... but that's okay ... next week i'll be attending another ritual.

i purged only 1 time and even had to force myself to it. i hope next time i wll purge more. but i think it had to do with the 10 days non eating a did before the ritual.

we drank 3 times. cleaning, haling, creation ... .rite of passage.

i didn't say a word - sat upright all nightlong - and walked arround the place with a big smile the next day feeling toatally peacefull - although the night before was my most fearfull experience of my life ... but i jyst experienced myself .. so ... nothing to fear.

my fears are mine - and i know them now.

i don't mind it ... i feel very at ease. darkness is a part of us.

TSSSJJOOOEEFFFF!

[Nagognog2]

Welcome home, fellow voyager.

[Silence_Inc]

tnx mate ...

last weekend it was again drinkin' time.

had a very relaxed travel. very telepthatic feelings and experiences .. personal chat with the shaman from the inside out. like through the mind we were talking. tic tac - question - answer. i even asked how it could happen cause my mind works in dutch - and swim said this language was universal. Allthough i wonder how much is 'true' of this experience. also had very visual exprience - really - if acid is the '60's, ayahuasca visions are from the year 10.000 + ... highly sofoticated. Also met up again with the darside and had a good laugh with it ... next time - i'll pet it on the head ... oh yes - and again i didn't throw up - although i would love to experienc eit ... strange.

[kurz]

I've been interested for ayahuasca for some time but I just don't know how to get it. I once tried ordering it but it didn't make through customs. Maybe growin Phalaris Arundinacea would be a choise, as seeds can be bought inside Finland in regular stores. Even if I got enough juice out of these plants, which sure don't have much DMT, I would be needing MAOi somewhere. I could also try to extract and smoke it, but both operations seem quite tricky afaik. Some ideas?

[Marsofold]

Phalaris Arundinacea would be a waste of time. SWIM'd recommend (in this preferred order): Psychotria Viridis leaf, Mimosa Hostilis rootbark, or Desmanthus Illinoisis/Leptolobus root. All of these can be extracted to crystal DMT and taken with a harmine/harmaline plant...

[kurz]

Yeah I tried ordering Diplopterys Cabrerana and Peganum Harmala along with Kratom powder and HBWR, they never made it to me... I don't have any other ideas. Well.. I should forgot that and start looking forward for the trip to Netherlands in summer.. there have some cannabis, psilocybin and prob salvia.

[Silence_Inc]

swim had an extraordinary experience yesterday ...

from darkness into the light...

ayahuasca isn't a drug - it's a medicin - a plantteacher - it's pure magic ...

it's the face of true life - true light- and true drakness ..

vision of spirals - webs of interconnectedness ...

nature, inner god, essence ... telepathy ...

ayahuasca is magnificent ...

all you need is love!

[Fantasian]

dmax, awsome trip report i only hope SWIF has an equally amazing experience and he can offer as much as you have.

[bearded]

First it should be noted, SWIM never had any experience with psychedelics other than MDMA before this event, but was a habitual user of marijuana, cocaine and heroin. Little did he know what he was getting into...

The day began like every day off. SWIM woke up, did yard work, got nice and sweaty. Around noon time, SWIM began to brew up his ayahuasca on the stove.

40g ground up Mimosa hostilis rootbark
7 grams P. harmala seeds
1 fresh lemon
a bunch of water.

All the ingredients were mixed together, and cooked on low for 2 hours. The liquid was than filtered with the sweaty t-shirt off of SWIM's back.

This procedure was repeated two more times, each time with a new lemon. The total product of liquid was evaporated down into two 8oz drinking glasses.

Why did SWIM filter with a sweaty t-shirt? It made him part of the drink, and he felt it would garuntee him a heavier experience.

Around 4PM SWIM's brother came over, and they made preperations for consumption. They each decided to get their brews down in a different style. SWIM drank it slowly over the course of one half hour. His brother downed the entire glass in under 10 minutes.

About 30 minutes after SWIM finished his drink, his brother purged. Too soon, it seemed, for him to get anything but very mild effects. He decided to just remain sober during this experience, as it looked like SWIM was already starting to have something intense going on.

SWIM's first alerts were a general increase in awareness. Colours were brighter. Sounds were...different. And then he started to get giggly. Very quickly his stomach became upset and unpleasant feeling, and he felt the need to vomit, but held it down.

The sunlight was shining threw a tree, casting shadows onto the wall across from where SWIM sat. "I can morph the shadows into whatever I want," he told his brother. "This is insanity."

As the intensity increased, it became very difficult for SWIM to keep his eyes open. Everything was just...too beautiful. He laid down on the couch, to let his mind wander.

The closed-eye visuals were wonderful, and went like this.

SWIM saw a giant mechanized robot gorrilla, and the bottom jaw was very triangular. The bottom jaw gave away from the rest, rotated, and turned into a pair of pants worn by a cowboy. This turned again, into the petal of a flower, and the flower was singing and dancing.

SWIM opened his eyes, and talked to his brother. He played with his cat, which was more interested in his actions than normal. The cat ended up remaining around for the rest of the trip.

About half an hour later, SWIM began to feel sick again, but held it down. He laid back down, and sat through the most intense experience of his life.

Without going into personal details, there was some sort of spirit contact, and SWIM blanked out of communication with the real world for about 15 minutes. As soon as he came to, he proclaimed to his brother, "[the plant] It's still alive. It doesn't mind us damaging it to use, but we can't abuse it."

Since this experience, through certain actions in the DMT world (that are personal), SWIM has completely stopped his use of harder drugs, and has begun to experiment rarely with other substances, mostly DMT and P. cubensis mushrooms.

Truely a life changing experience, and SWIM feels it should speak for the psychotheraputic abilities of an oral DMT route.

SWIM has never vomited during an ayahuasca experiment, either. Maybe he has a strong stomach, but everyone he allows into this world ends up purging at once point. The nastiest shits of your life will follow in the few hours after the experience though...

Other things that should be discussed, he feels:

The cat. It's a friendly cat, by all means, but never has it sat through
an entire 6-8 hours of someone doing nothing. She seemed to see the shadows the way SWIM was seeing them, and was entirely fixated on whatever he was enjoying. SWIM's other animals never have done this.

Adding some by-product of your body into your brews. Maybe it's just placebo, but SWIM feels it really gets you in touch with what you need to.

Reputation Comments on this post:

	great report, very descriptive
	Good for SWIY, and thanks for sharing.

[Silence_Inc]

ayahuasca is a pure goddess !

Energy - frequency - honesty - divine light ... darkness..Struggle … shadows..

Life is full of waves and ayahuasca shows you the sea – but it also shows you there can’t be no sea without waves ... it breathes - time does not exist - ego is an illusion ... but life is as real as you experience it - even the ego - even the illusions and even time is something that can be experienced ...

Ayahuasca shows this ... life in all it’s facets … excluding none – and showing only one … the divine force … look – I am your mother!


maybe swims experience post on ayahuasca arn't very fun to read - they don't involve many colors or patterns or explanations on what happened ... they aren’t linear ... but that is because Ayahuasca doesn't work linear ... ayahuasca can’t be explained nor understood …

it gives visions - but the essence is what creates the visions ... television is just images - it's the creator the makes the colors and movements ...


swim done ayahuasca 5 times this last year - and i feel like i only want to do ayahuasca from now on ... no more acid ... no longing for other sensations ... ayahuasca can teach you all there is to know.


these travels always happen under guidance of a sjaman ... and that makes them so powerfull. the icaros work when they are song by a strong sjaman.