Journal - Hey everyone, need some words

[teddybearpicnics]

Ok everyone swim would like to introduce himself. Swims name is teddy, and swim hasn't posted much on these forums, but is always reading them.

Swim has been an addict for four years now, and has been in a relationship for over a year with a fine young lady, who is also an addict. We were living together and we both lost our jobs in the same week. Had to move back home. Beat city. My girl has a way of breaking rules, ALL the time, so her mom and her partner, obviously they're lesbians, made her go to rehab. After that she has to move in with her father in Philadelphia. That's 3 hours away from where swim lives.

So now swim is wondering, do you try and make the relationship work long distance? Do you just hope that we can sometime work it out in the near future? Many questions on that front...

Also, swim has about 20 days worth of suboxone. Should swim just say fuck it and get clean, even though he wants to use more than ever. Or do you just keep living the same way you were and take a suboxone whenever you can't get shit. AHH I need to go to work tonight, and I don't want to. I just want to get wasted. I hate my life. Oh well. Any words would be appreciated, and not the typical answer of "Oh it will work out and be peaches and cream" sugarcoated bullshit. I wanna know what you guys would do. And for real answers from the heart. I'm a straightforward person and nothing is going to upset me. So here we go. also...anyone that wants to get to be friends and is from PA, hit me up on

myspace.com/teddybearpicnicsmusic. thanks. peace. love. kaos.