Addiction - H 4 - the white stuff

[chopmow]

The part of the world where swim lives he always gets H4, the white stuff, uncut and clean.

Swim only snorts it and then smokes a little in a joint as this seems to make effects much stronger.

Anyway swim recently did 4g's on the trot, averaging .5g per day, so got rid of it in around a week.

Swim noticed mild withdrawls for two days after supply ran out. he also noticed his tolorance built up very quick. What started as small lines quickly got pretty large towards the end for the same effect.

Swims withdrawls were mild sweats and feeling cold, also maybe he was a bit grumpy. anyway nothing too serious.

Swim would like to know how long till tollorance is back to 0 and also when it would be safe for him to dabble again.

Can the physical addiction get worse the more you use even if you take gaps, say 1 month between using.

Swim plans to get 4g's every month and use, then give up for one month, is this doable or asking for trouble. Will the withdrawls get worse every month, or stay same as enough time is given to bring tollorance back down to normal.

[raven3davis]

Everyone is different. For SWIM, the withdrawals don't get worse. The first time he came off was the worse. The second time was bad, but the third kind was cake.

Your plan of action is calling for trouble. It will be extremely hard to buy 4g and do it all, then stop fr a month. Heroin is a hard drug to do that with.

[chopmow]

It's a hassle for swim to get it which is why swim gets a decent amount. Swim would love to have some now but has the tolorance to go without until a month has passed.

Swim thinks it's important to keep this 1 month rule, if this rule is broken then swim is defo on a slippery slope.......

[Methadrone]

Ever swimmers different but, in swims experience swiy may find swiy getting swiys tolerance back to zero and then find after a few days it will be back to where swiy is now. Swim thinks H is a slippery slope and would advise swiy to try to stay away from it totally or swiy will probably end up with a bad habit and suffer withdrawls alot if swiy cant readily get it.

[youdontknow]

Let me tell swiy something. Just stop. Look the other way and dopnt fuck with it man. Everyone in this forum can sit here and say "oh yeah getting high is so great and withdrawls arent bad and yada yada yada" Man, All it takes is to use for three days straight for addiction to start. And your talking about a month? Its fucking shit being addicted to opiates man. I know you probably wont listen to my advice but trust me, in two or three years when swiy needs to use some form of opiate daily just so your fucking nose will quit running, youll wish you had. SWIM wishes he could go back to the younger days and steer clear of opiates. Swim has done everything, weed. shroom, all kinds of pills, meth, coke, and of course H aand none of the others even come close to the way h makes you feel. Thats why its so bad, because its so good...

Reputation Comments on this post:

	so so true....good advice
	TRUE TRUE... thanks for adding some of this reality to the forum...i'm afraid we need more like you.

[Junkhead23]

SWIM thinks SWIY will not be able to keep this up. Believe SWIM when SWIM first started it was a weekend only thing. This lasted for 6 months until SWIM lost job so used a lot more got dependent and put on Methadone. Now SWIM does anything to get H. Please for SWIYs sake do something else.

Reputation Comments on this post:

this is v true, unfortunately it often works out this way

[Herbal Remedy]

If SWIY is responsible enough then yea, its a workable idea.

IF swim picked up 4gs it would be gone in a week cuz swim will do drugs if he has them, its just how it goes.

[chopmow]

Swim is weak.......

He just ordered another 4g of H4, He last used 5 days ago.

Swim don't really know why he ordered it he just did.

[oldbulllee]

swim knows that it's theoretically possible to do what swiy has stated above as his plan for doing H and not geting too fucked up. however, swim has not seen such case in practice. ever.
swim started off ( with H, not other stuff), doing a gram- gram and a half a month.it lasted for about 4-5 months.
now, swim is dopesick every other week.

[chopmow]

Swims got it now, just had a little toot. He did his normal 2cm long bump to test strength and is pretty impressed. Purity is always very high out this way, but this seems even better than usual.

Swim was wondering if any swiys know what purity uncut H4 usually is. He was guessing 90%+ does anyone know?

Swim also wonders what % purity average street brown is, swim has never seen it, let alone used it.

[jon-q]

Originally Posted by chopmow

Swims got it now, just had a little toot. He did his normal 2cm long bump to test strength and is pretty impressed. Purity is always very high out this way, but this seems even better than usual.

Swim was wondering if any swiys know what purity uncut H4 usually is. He was guessing 90%+ does anyone know?

Swim also wonders what % purity average street brown is, swim has never seen it, let alone used it.

Swim tells me that the colour of Heroin means nothing as to it's purity..
DEA-Report in 2000 = average purity on the kilo of heroin in usa was between 75%-90% dependant on the price paid.
same report figures for UK 2002 70% purity on the kilo.
This report found purity on the streets as low as 20% up to 50% in the uk p/gram and purity in usa as low as 30% up to 62% p/gram.
Basicly the lower the amount~the more chance of more adulterant and the cheap stuff is more likely to be weaker than the more expensive stuff.
Swim personally thinks these figures are lower now esp in the uk.

[Richard_smoker]

i agree with Deadlegend on this one.

just STOP IT NOW!!

i know that's probably the hardest thing in the world to even consider at this point--mostly because all you've seen is the "good" aspects of this devil. He will seduce you in at first...and the next thing you know, you will be doing things you'd never EVER dreamed just to get your fix for today.

sometimes i get really pissed off at all the 'drug education' we get in elementary school and junior high because they teach us that ALL drugs are like this. Very quickly, we realize they were lying... but believe me when i tell you that with THIS DRUG (and all opiates for that matter), they were SPOT ON! It will literally rob you of everything that is you. and then, when you realize it, quitting is just shy of impossible due to the bone-shattering withdrawals. just my $0.02.
-DICK

Reputation Comments on this post:

	wisely spoken...op listen to this pig!
	I concur... wise advice indeed!

[KaLiShNiKoF]

WoW, SWIM wished they had H4, just brown stuff out here they say... not bad though. like Jon-q said, color does not seem to matter, although if SWIY says they can smoke it in a joint and feel good? that's interesting, and it amazes me. they should definitely put some on a piece of foil and chase that dragon... let me know how the affects are.

[hijaQr]

I always thought that you couldnt smoke H4?

[MEKONE]

Originally Posted by chopmow

Swim noticed mild withdrawls for two days after supply ran out. he also noticed his tolorance built up very quick. What started as small lines quickly got pretty large towards the end for the same effect.

Swims withdrawls were mild sweats and feeling cold, also maybe he was a bit grumpy. anyway nothing too serious.

Swim would like to know how long till tollorance is back to 0 and also when it would be safe for him to dabble again.

Can the physical addiction get worse the more you use even if you take gaps, say 1 month between using.

Swim plans to get 4g's every month and use, then give up for one month, is this doable or asking for trouble. Will the withdrawls get worse every month, or stay same as enough time is given to bring tollorance back down to normal.

SWIY is apparently chipping and trying to do it right to avoid addiction.The problem is that SWIY already likes the "H" and has future plans for it.Not saying that there is anything wrong with that BUT that is how SERIOUS addiction starts.
SWIY will more than likely achive the desired effects he/she wants by waiting the month out but they will need a strong will power for that inevitable month where SWIY is not achieving the same effects from the usual amount.In SWIM's oppinion take it week by week/day by day,W/D's only get worse never better as long as SWIY is using.Good Luck!!

[chopmow]

Swim hasn't posted for a while, but at the moment swim has a pretty steady habit although for him it isn't something that worries him.

Let me explain why........

The line of work he is in involves very late nights, 7 nights a week and also drinking heavily. Swim doesn't mix the drink with the H, but next day soon as he wakes up with a stinking hangover he has a toot and feels right as rain. On days when he has nothing he feels like shit.

Swim can buy Meth over the counter here and can get clean in 7 days absolutely no problem, trouble is soon as he has to go back to work in the clubs he needs to use the next day in order to beat the hangover.

Many might say just don't drink, this just isn't possible for swim........

Anyway as ridiculous as it may sound using has enabled swim to build his business up very successfully and his habit stays constant at around 0.5g of pure h4 daily. A toot soon as he wakes up, several more throughout the day, a few joints, then off to work with no more using till the following morning.

Swim no longer gets the nod, infact he basically just uses in order that he doesn't feel the shitty effects of alcohol hangover.

Swim went away on holiday for 1 month, used meth for 1st week, and then no use for following 3 weeks. swim felt no craving at all.

When swim went back to work he had to start using again, for week was bliss, zero tolorance, the nodd etc etc. After 2 weeks he was back to where he was.

Is using for this reason rare, swim hasn't heard of many that use in order to help them work, it's almost medicinal.

What are swiys opinions on swims reasons for using, the ease he can leave the stuff alone as long as he has the meth to get off and has no work that involves drinking heavily and using the only hangover cure that he knows really works.

It's obviously an un usual hangover cure, but costs in this area are cheap and far out weigh the amounts being made as a result of swim being able to work 7 nights a week all hours of the night without feeling shitty.

There is no way swim would be earning the $ he is without being able to use H, he would defo only be able to work every other day as a hangover put swim out of action for 24hrs........

Reputation Comments on this post:

	Atleast SWIM is honest about the situation
	yes opiates are the best hangover cure ever! works wonders!

[oldbulllee]

Originally Posted by chopmow

Swim hasn't posted for a while, but at the moment swim has a pretty steady habit although for him it isn't something that worries him.

Let me explain why........

The line of work he is in involves very late nights, 7 nights a week and also drinking heavily. Swim doesn't mix the drink with the H, but next day soon as he wakes up with a stinking hangover he has a toot and feels right as rain. On days when he has nothing he feels like shit.

Swim can buy Meth over the counter here and can get clean in 7 days absolutely no problem, trouble is soon as he has to go back to work in the clubs he needs to use the next day in order to beat the hangover.

Many might say just don't drink, this just isn't possible for swim........

Anyway as ridiculous as it may sound using has enabled swim to build his business up very successfully and his habit stays constant at around 0.5g of pure h4 daily. A toot soon as he wakes up, several more throughout the day, a few joints, then off to work with no more using till the following morning.

Swim no longer gets the nod, infact he basically just uses in order that he doesn't feel the shitty effects of alcohol hangover.

Swim went away on holiday for 1 month, used meth for 1st week, and then no use for following 3 weeks. swim felt no craving at all.

When swim went back to work he had to start using again, for week was bliss, zero tolorance, the nodd etc etc. After 2 weeks he was back to where he was.

Is using for this reason rare, swim hasn't heard of many that use in order to help them work, it's almost medicinal.

What are swiys opinions on swims reasons for using, the ease he can leave the stuff alone as long as he has the meth to get off and has no work that involves drinking heavily and using the only hangover cure that he knows really works.

It's obviously an un usual hangover cure, but costs in this area are cheap and far out weigh the amounts being made as a result of swim being able to work 7 nights a week all hours of the night without feeling shitty.

There is no way swim would be earning the $ he is without being able to use H, he would defo only be able to work every other day as a hangover put swim out of action for 24hrs........

good luck. swiy is fucked. swim also used/ uses to facilitate his working abilities. guess what? it doesn't work that way. nor can the rule be bent. addiction is imminent. swim better find another remedy for his hangovers; if it isn't all ready too late.

[helene]

All of us swimmers had some sort of way of rationalising our use in the early days.

First it starts off as purely recreational, "I'm not gonna get a habit if I only use at weekends"..at that point, the need to rationalise wasn't there, as there was no previous experience of addiction/ withdrawal. It was fun, it was a bit dangerous, but swim honestly believed she had it sussed, as did many other swimmers in her position: they'd worked out the secret way to not get addicted - and they were chuffed to bits with themselves over it, and to celebrate, they went out and scored.

The real rationalisation (AKA lying to yourself) starts up when you begin to realise that maybe it isn't quite that easy...that your usage plan isn't as easy to stick to as you first thought. That's when you need to start coming up with excuses (to give to others, yes, but mainly for yourself) to explain your continued use. To explain why you fucked up your fool-proof plan. To avoid the bitter truth, cos it's too damn horrific to realise that you're steaming head-first towards a raging smack-habit at 1000miles per hour and you haven't got a hope in hell of stopping yourself before it's too late.

So you start thinking up things that smack has given you, benifits to your work life, benefits to your ability to socialise, financial benefits. Yeh, that'll do, that'll put your mind at rest, give you a few more months of using before you need to re-evaluate the situation, and face the inconvenient truth. These are all very short-lived benefits. If they even exist. Swim is dubious, she thinks the OP is desperately trying to find something positive to buffer the shock of realising he's addicted.

Heroin takes your ability to socialise, your circle of friends slowly draws in, smaller and smaller. The OP's claim of an improved business life - it wont last. How can it? Heroin becomes number one priority. Your world gets smaller and smaller; what started off as something that improved your sociability, is now destroying it. You find yourself going days without speaking to anyone who isn't on gear. And as for finances: ever heard the phrase "you live within your means"? the more money you have, the more heroin you will take, the bigger your habit will get. But it won't stop there, cos something will go wrong, and then you'll have a fuck-off massive habit, and no means to fund it. And that's when things start going really wrong...

So methadone is available OTC there, okay. But are you happy being on methadone for the forseeable future? Cos as time goes by, the more gear you take, the more often you take it, it will take more and more meth to hold you. And it won't work as well either, the first day off the gear on the meth you'll feel awful. It'll get harder and harder to taper off the meth as well, the longer you're on it.

What swim is basically trying to say is this: If by some stroke of luck you're really still in the position to be able to stop taking gear like that, taper down off a couple of days of meth and quit with minimal difficulty, then for god's sake do it, but don't start taking the gear again. Cos it's just gonna get harder and harder. And in swim's opinion, you're gonna keep making excuses to yourself, justifying your use, until it's far too late to stop without the normal ensuing weeks of withdrawal hell.

H

Reputation Comments on this post:

	Good dose of reality in the txt above from swihelene
	This is the truth of heroin addiction.

[chopmow]

Originally Posted by helene

All of us swimmers had some sort of way of rationalising our use in the early days.

First it starts off as purely recreational, "I'm not gonna get a habit if I only use at weekends"..at that point, the need to rationalise wasn't there, as there was no previous experience of addiction/ withdrawal. It was fun, it was a bit dangerous, but swim honestly believed she had it sussed, as did many other swimmers in her position: they'd worked out the secret way to not get addicted - and they were chuffed to bits with themselves over it, and to celebrate, they went out and scored.

The real rationalisation (AKA lying to yourself) starts up when you begin to realise that maybe it isn't quite that easy...that your usage plan isn't as easy to stick to as you first thought. That's when you need to start coming up with excuses (to give to others, yes, but mainly for yourself) to explain your continued use. To explain why you fucked up your fool-proof plan. To avoid the bitter truth, cos it's too damn horrific to realise that you're steaming head-first towards a raging smack-habit at 1000miles per hour and you haven't got a hope in hell of stopping yourself before it's too late.

So you start thinking up things that smack has given you, benifits to your work life, benefits to your ability to socialise, financial benefits. Yeh, that'll do, that'll put your mind at rest, give you a few more months of using before you need to re-evaluate the situation, and face the inconvenient truth. These are all very short-lived benefits. If they even exist. Swim is dubious, she thinks the OP is desperately trying to find something positive to buffer the shock of realising he's addicted.

Heroin takes your ability to socialise, your circle of friends slowly draws in, smaller and smaller. The OP's claim of an improved business life - it wont last. How can it? Heroin becomes number one priority. Your world gets smaller and smaller; what started off as something that improved your sociability, is now destroying it. You find yourself going days without speaking to anyone who isn't on gear. And as for finances: ever heard the phrase "you live within your means"? the more money you have, the more heroin you will take, the bigger your habit will get. But it won't stop there, cos something will go wrong, and then you'll have a fuck-off massive habit, and no means to fund it. And that's when things start going really wrong...

So methadone is available OTC there, okay. But are you happy being on methadone for the forseeable future? Cos as time goes by, the more gear you take, the more often you take it, it will take more and more meth to hold you. And it won't work as well either, the first day off the gear on the meth you'll feel awful. It'll get harder and harder to taper off the meth as well, the longer you're on it.

What swim is basically trying to say is this: If by some stroke of luck you're really still in the position to be able to stop taking gear like that, taper down off a couple of days of meth and quit with minimal difficulty, then for god's sake do it, but don't start taking the gear again. Cos it's just gonna get harder and harder. And in swim's opinion, you're gonna keep making excuses to yourself, justifying your use, until it's far too late to stop without the normal ensuing weeks of withdrawal hell.

H

Wow!!!

Reality check, and probobally some if the best advice swim will ever recieve no doubt.

One thing, when swim wants to stop he takes a 16 day course of meth and thats it. No mental addiction and no craving after the course is finished. Swim went away once for a month, he got clean at home, then went away and didn't use for one month. When he returned home he stayed off for another week, until he had to resume work, after that he returned to use in order to work everyday.

Is it possible that swim can continue in this way or is it unheard of? Will swim definately sooner or later get mad cravings and mental addiction when he is clean and not working if he continues using in this way?

Swim really isn't looking for excuses to use, it's quite simple if he didn't work the job he did he wouldn't use.

Also it's never going to bankrupt swim as it is very cheap here.

thanks for a great post by the way.......

Swim is defo physically addicted, but finds it very easy to come off using meth and doesn't feel any urge to start again unless he needs to work, soon swim has to go away for 6 weeks where he will again taper off on meth 2 weeks before he goes away. He's pretty sure he won't get cravings, what do swiys think if he doesn't get mental addiction, is this possible?

Is it rare?

Is it something that will definatley happen the longer swim uses for?

Or are there some people that never develope a mental addiction.

Swim used to smoke rocks, cos he loves the buzz, he would spend a fortune on it. One day swim decided it was costing him too much, he was still enjoying it, but it had gotten to a point that the binges were costing a fortune.

Just like that swim decided to stop and he has never touched it since. He doesn't get cravings or the urge to smoke it ever. If it was free he would tho! In this part of the world it isn't cheap tho so swim had to knock it on the head. Perhaps he should move to columbia.

On second thoughts he prefers the H, so swim will stay put in this part if the world.

Seriously though, the thing swim is really trying to find out is, is it possible to use H longterm without developing a mental addiction and cravings.

Swim is 100% sure that is he lived in europe he wouldn't touch the stuff, no way he would spend so much $ on something thats cut to fuck. Swim toots 0.5g per day, this costs swim peanuts. By the way swim never nods anymore, only time he nods is if he stops for over a week and starts again. If he has a week off work he often stops, uses meth to get tolorance down then really enjoys the first few days when his tolorance is low.

[fuzelogic]

Originally Posted by chopmow

No mental addiction and no craving after the course is finished. Swim went away once for a month, he got clean at home, then went away and didn't use for one month. When he returned home he stayed off for another week, until he had to resume work, after that he returned to use in order to work everyday.

SWIM is NOT a pyshcologist, but SWIM believes there is a mental addiction on a subconscious level. SWIY just may not realize it, but it will become clear as it bubbles to the surface.

Is this JOB really worth the trade-off of Heroin Addiction as what other SWIMMERS have tried to warn SWIY about?

Originally Posted by chopmow
He's pretty sure he won't get cravings, what do swiys think if he doesn't get mental addiction, is this possible?

Is it rare?

Is it something that will definatley happen the longer swim uses for?

Or are there some people that never develope a mental addiction.

SWIM is sorry to say that SWIY is not an exception to the rule.

Originally Posted by chopmow
Swim is 100% sure that is he lived in europe he wouldn't touch the stuff, no way he would spend so much $ on something thats cut to fuck. Swim toots 0.5g per day, this costs swim peanuts.

SWIM is curious how a person who gets better dope is "Holier Than Thou" because most swimmers encounter the same symptoms when dope sick!

Thanks for keeping the thread updated on SWIM's progress and allowing other swimmers to learn from SWIY experience.

[hijaQr]

Originally Posted by chopmow

Swim hasn't posted for a while, but at the moment swim has a pretty steady habit although for him it isn't something that worries him.

Let me explain why........

The line of work he is in involves very late nights, 7 nights a week and also drinking heavily. Swim doesn't mix the drink with the H, but next day soon as he wakes up with a stinking hangover he has a toot and feels right as rain. On days when he has nothing he feels like shit.

Swim can buy Meth over the counter here and can get clean in 7 days absolutely no problem, trouble is soon as he has to go back to work in the clubs he needs to use the next day in order to beat the hangover.

Many might say just don't drink, this just isn't possible for swim........

Anyway as ridiculous as it may sound using has enabled swim to build his business up very successfully and his habit stays constant at around 0.5g of pure h4 daily. A toot soon as he wakes up, several more throughout the day, a few joints, then off to work with no more using till the following morning.

Swim no longer gets the nod, infact he basically just uses in order that he doesn't feel the shitty effects of alcohol hangover.

Swim went away on holiday for 1 month, used meth for 1st week, and then no use for following 3 weeks. swim felt no craving at all.

When swim went back to work he had to start using again, for week was bliss, zero tolorance, the nodd etc etc. After 2 weeks he was back to where he was.

Is using for this reason rare, swim hasn't heard of many that use in order to help them work, it's almost medicinal.

What are swiys opinions on swims reasons for using, the ease he can leave the stuff alone as long as he has the meth to get off and has no work that involves drinking heavily and using the only hangover cure that he knows really works.

It's obviously an un usual hangover cure, but costs in this area are cheap and far out weigh the amounts being made as a result of swim being able to work 7 nights a week all hours of the night without feeling shitty.

There is no way swim would be earning the $ he is without being able to use H, he would defo only be able to work every other day as a hangover put swim out of actioC for 24hrs........

Man I always thought the best way of beating off a bad hangover is to have a drink the next morning, One, or maybe two drinks to put the pain in a box and kick it on down the street.Works a treat, I feel normal again! It's allot less money, less impact on ur health, so to me it makes the most sense. But maybe that's just cause I'm Irish and that's what we do over here to get rid of hangovers, have a couple of beers/shots whatever, and leave it at that. CAlled the 'Hair o' the dog' so it is!

Although i must say that if you are a alcoholic and having the hair o the dog after a night out then that would probably lead you to not just drink the 'hair o the dog' but possibly the whole of the rest of the dog too..hehe
But if ur not an alco, and u only drink cuz u say u have to do it at work then take our advice and try having a couple of drinks the morining after rather than a bag of smack to toot on,..... Eh? ...!Toottoot! Could be saving yourself a whole load of pain and mysery I say but good luck with it

[beizebopp]

SWIM would suggest laying off of the drug for a while. Atleast until he gets his nod back, (else it's a waste no? )

There are many other effective hangover cures, not near as effective but still good.
SWIM makes sure to drink an equal amount of water to the alcohol he has drunk, normally means he has to get up and piss, and its damn hard to drink so much water sometimes, but he rarely has a bad hangover when doing that.

Taking vitamins before going to bed seems to help SWIM.

SWIM finds taking H4 as a hangover cure is a bit much, take it as a recreational drug and enjoy the effects, but getting hooked so that you dont experience a hangover is counter productive. SWIM hopes you stop the stuff for a while and have a good think about it before starting again.

Good luck_

[chopmow]

After reading the posts, particulary that by misssparkles, swim decided to stop being so naive, swim is now nearing the end of his meth course and will finish the course in another two days.

Swim has been surprised that he hasn't had any desire to score........

Perhaps swim stopped just in time..........

[mickey_bee]

Got a weird feeling that this story is far from over.......

Swim wishes you the best of luck, and just asks that next time that little voice in your head pops up with, 'hey well done on that work trip, you did great, and you didn't use for 6 whole weeks! It was easy really wasn't it! Hey lets get a few g's to celebrate, partner!'..........you realise that actually, the psychological pull is still there, and you still need to fight it.

Swim himself chipped successfully for about a year, and the entire time thought that addicts were a bit stupid for going and getting themselves hooked on the shit, when it really was as easy as to simply spread out your usage and avoid becoming hooked............(I know )

There have been many, many topics like this where people in the early stages of a habit frantically look for some sort of junk role-model who can play with fire but never get burnt. I always ask that people remember life is constantly changing. You don't know what's round the next corner, or how you'll deal with it.

After a year of chipping, even if no physical addiction has built up, a strong psychological addiction is already there. Then one day for whatever reason something bad happens, and your left depressed, upset.........it's a normal part of life. But if heroin is there to comfort you, it really can be the beginning of the end.

Swim lived in a house with 3 other people. All of them tried heroin about the same time. Only one hasn't had major problems with addiction.

Just turn your back and keep going. Essentially heroin can give your life absolutely nothing.
Pleasure without reason is not a good thing, and doesn't build character or personality; it attacks both!

Aside from that, there isn't even pleasure to be gained from heroin after a while, it is purely survival. 20 minutes ago swim IV'd £15 of heroin, not for pleasure, but just so he could get up and start his day.......there's no high anymore.

Sorry to ramble, it's just swim knows exactly how your mind is working, and really doesn't want to see yet another person fuck-up a large portion of their life.

Reputation Comments on this post:

	Good warning about how addiction escalates, and that need to go out and celebrate clean time.
	Great insight, real talk.

[helene]

Originally Posted by mickey_bee

Swim himself chipped successfully for about a year, and the entire time thought that addicts were a bit stupid for going and getting themselves hooked on the shit, when it really was as easy as to simply spread out your usage and avoid becoming hooked............(I know )

There have been many, many topics like this where people in the early stages of a habit frantically look for some sort of junk role-model who can play with fire but never get burnt. I always ask that people remember life is constantly changing. You don't know what's round the next corner, or how you'll deal with it.

After a year of chipping, even if no physical addiction has built up, a strong psychological addiction is already there. Then one day for whatever reason something bad happens, and your left depressed, upset.........it's a normal part of life. But if heroin is there to comfort you, it really can be the beginning of the end.

Mickey_bee, I'm so glad you mentioned the above, as it's something I feel is not talked about nearly enough.

It is important to remember that addiction doesn't necessarily occur straight away.

Many people, on their initial introduction to heroin, manage to maintain a period of, for want of a better word, "successful" chipping. In that they use recreationally, on a semi-regular basis, and yet manage to avoid physical addiction. The reason for this could be one of many things; They aren't using heroin in the same way that an addict does, it's a new, fun, exciting thing to do, they're aware of the risks of getting a habit, and think they've worked out a way to avoid it. Swim recalls thinking exactly the same thing as mickey_bee said in his post, when she first starting using - that people who go and get themselves hooked are pretty silly really, cos it's easy to avoid. Hah.

So these new users are having fun, going out, getting wasted, and they haven't yet fallen into the trap of physical dependence, and think they've discovered an amazing, magic way of avoiding it. All these bullshit "only use once a week", or "three day rules" or whatever, great in principle, but who can ever stick to them?!

Granted, this period may last weeks, months, or even years. But when their adherence to their chosen rule begins to slip, and a habit starts to develop, often it still isn't recognised for what it is. Maybe their opiate-naivety does something to disguise the onset of withdrawal. Because they don't know what to expect, when they wake up one morning feeling ill, they put it down to having a bit too heavy a night. Because they haven't got into the habit of self-medicating against withdrawal, that routine of instant gratification/ cessation of pain hasn't yet been established. Or maybe they are taking lots of other drugs, going out, having fun, and are used to feeling a little worse for wear the following day. Again, they put it down to burning the candle at both ends, as opposed to the initial stages of a physical addiction.

So how does someone end up getting a habit? One thing that pretty much all heroin addicts have in common, is the fact that they didn't set out with the intention of getting addicted. Yet it does happen.

Again, going back to what mickey_bee said in his above post, you can't predict what's gonna happen in the future. Bad things happen in life. Relationships break up. Friends, family members get ill, have crises etc. Someone close to you may die. These things happen, sadly, to everyone, at one point or another during their life. But the thing about heroin is, once you've had a taste of it, you know it's there. Even though in the past, you weren't using it in that way at all, now, heroin becomes an attractive means of distraction, a way of numbing pain, of distancing yourself from the shit stuff that's going on in your life, of putting a barrier between you and the pain. And as soon as you start using it in this way, you're fucked.

So what I'm basically trying to say is this; If you're considering trying heroin for the first time, just bear all this in mind. I don't go in for that "try it once, and you're an addict for life" bullshit, but if look at it in a slightly different way, there is some truth in it. In as much as once you've had a taste of it (or it's had a taste of you), you're always going to know what it's like, it's always going to be there as an option.

And if right now, you're in these initial stages of heroin experimentation, going out, having fun getting wasted with your mates, in a purely recreational manner, just think about this. It may seem impossible, even absurd that you'd let yourself get a habit, in your current mindset. But things change, and you can't undo that initial decision to try heroin. As soon as you start using it to escape/ numb pain, things will start going very wrong, very fast.

So don't get too comfortable, and don't let your guard down. Heroin has an uncanny way of seeking out weaknesses, low-points in your life, and taking full advantage of them, worming its way into your life, until it's completely taken over.

H