Health - Acid : I'm not the same. I need help please.

[xShr00mzZ]

Hey guys. SWIM dropped acid for the FIRST AND ONLY TIME on his 16th birthday. It was one blotter, low in dosage, lasted the whole night from about 11pm to 10am. SWIM thought It'd be an awesome experience and an amazing trip, which from what SWIM told me it was. But later that week SWIM was clean, but did not feel exactly sober. He felt somewhat, not the same. It has been about three months since SWIM experience and has stopped toking for about the past two weeks. He did not smoke too much anyways, maybe twice a week at the most. He feels that he can concentrate a little better but still remains a different person. He also cannot look at himself in the mirror for very long. He starts to space out and doesn't feel like the old him. SWIM is very worried and very scared that he will NEVER go back to himself again. SWIM says he doesn't "trip out" or have flashbacks or any of that, no visuals, no hallucinations, he just doesn't see out of his eyes the same, as in everything looks different for some reason. Not literally different like changing shapes but just different in general. SWIM says it's very hard to explain. He would like to know if anyone knows what he's talking about, if anyone has similar problems, and most importantly, WILL I EVER BE THE SAME OR WILL IT EVER DIE DOWN JUST A LITTLE OVER TIME. SWIM also is never doing acid again. Ever.

P.S.
SWIM's best friend also shared this experience with him. Same night, first time as well, hasn't done it since. He says he felt the same way SWIM felt, but after a month or so, lucky him, they went away.

PLEASE HELP SWIM. FOR THE LOVE OF GOD THIS IS DRIVING SWIM NUTS.

[elpatto]

SWIM has a somewhat similar experience to tell. SWIM had taken acid plenty of times before and never had any permanent effects. One night swim, after building up a huge tollerance and inheriting all this free acid, ate 6 tabs at the same time. SWIM has not been the same since and it is about 7 months ago that all this took place.

At the same time SWIM can't say that he is any worse off, infact the ocasional exra perspective comes in quite handy.

SWIM has known many people permanently damage themselves with acid.

Probably no help at all, but i think if it continues for another couple of months then it will probably stick. I think some people are more suceptible to almost "Flashback" effects, like trippy feelings or a fraction of the wonderous effects of acid, never like intense visuals but often the same feelings. At the same time these people often reported these symptoms stoped after 3-4 months.

Best of luck anyway.

[Alfa]

FUBAR has used acid many times and must say that he had lingering effects quite often. Some even sticked around for quite some time. But all of them disappeared.

But at the same time FUBAR finds LSD experiences highly intense. It's like the experience of a life time is compressed in one trip. So it is not surprising that this experience would change him, like any intense experience.

Even though it may seem that a LSD experience is over after the effects wane off, LSD is has effect to some degree for a few weeks. This might explain why reverse tolerance for LSD and many other 5ht2a psychedelics lingers for a few weeks after the use of LSD.

Sometimes a psychedelic experience leaves one in a mind frame, or state of mind of you will, that does not feel right. FUBAR always sees where it is going for a month or so. If he decides that he really prefers a different mindset, then he uses a window. MDMA usually does the trick.

However; FUBAR can not advise this method to everybody.This method might worsen the situation as well. That all depends upon the stability and psychological flexability of the person involved.

Reputation Comments on this post:

always have great advice!

[Panthers007]

For lasting effects, the same rules apply as when actually taking the drug. This means just relaxing and letting it go freely. Lasting effects can mean there is some element of the experience that remains unresolved. SWIM may know what this is/was. Or it may be unconscious and unknown to SWIM. So SWIM needs to just relax and be calm. The information needed will come of and on it's own. Being afraid only blocks the process and drags it out.

Relax. It will pass soon, SWIM.

Regards MDMA to put a different spin on this, this would be a last-resort tool in the inventory. But if it works for SWIM, by all means go forth and try same. If this is unknown territory, it could add more anxiety at this point and is best avoided.

Reputation Comments on this post:

	Good as always.
	surely this helped the OP

[Bajeda]

This sounds like derealization from what swiy describes, though it isn't possible to discern whether this is the case or not through the internet. More details could be helpful to flesh out a better picture, but in the end only swiy can decide whether he feels its time to seek professional help, or whether he feels that the symptoms are dissipating.

Elevated anxiety won't help swiy's situation, so it's probably a good idea to try and keep calm and collected, and avoid getting worked up when swiy feels the perceptual changes getting to him. Meditation or concentrated breathing patterns could help with this.

Has swiy spoken about this problem with any friends or family?

[Alfa]

Originally Posted by elpatto

I'm not too sure about that man ^^^, there are thousands upon thousands that did permanent harm or atleast had a permanent effect.

Although I concur that some people are not built for acid and may therefore encounter problems and possibly after effects, thousands upon thousands is going waaay overboard with your claims.

It is highly unlikely that psychedelics such as LSD cause psychological problems or problematic after effects. But as LSD is a very powerful tool, it may uncover underlying issues and processes, that may otherwise have surfaced later in life. Normally the person would have seen a psychological issue develop slowly and then process it over the years. In a LSD trip this may surface as a surprise and then the user may go trough it at warp speed. Many would claim this is a positive side of LSD, though some run into serious problems with this.

So what makes the difference between these groups? It is often a matter of attitude, trust and the capacity to let go. Fighting with your own processes, struggling, fear to let go are exactly what causes bad trips. Because this frustrates the strong processes that LSD brings into motion.

This seems to be exactly what Panthers is referring to. Relaxing, letting go is the way to go.

FUBAR has the attitude that if he gets run over by a freight train of a trip and then is dropped naked on the North Pole, he will laugh about the situation and sing during his walk home. Now this may not seem realistic to some, but FUBAR sure gets by and he sure gets trough... anything.

FUBAR once owned the Osho tarot, which had a card named 'This too shall pass'. There is a story that goes with it. You might find it helpful...

Reputation Comments on this post:

I love your posts of this nature.

[dscb17]

dropping acid is a life changing experience. so are taking ecstasy and mushrooms. in swims opinion anyone taking these drugs for the first time, would be changed forever. swim was changed for life after taking all of them the first time, since then he has always seen the world and himself differently.

[Frond]

I would like to hear about these thousands and thousands of people that took acid and came to permanent harm. Because try as I might, I can't find any actual hard data to back that claim up. Most sources seem to indicate that LSD is pretty safe when used responsibly, but then again it's also illegal for some strange reason...

RE OP:

Relax! Don't panic!

Personally, I think SWIY is far too young to have done something like this, as it takes some maturity and self-analytical capability to be able to integrate a heavy acid experience. But, I don't know SWIY, so I can't make judgments about him.

However, a lengthy re-integration period after a serious experience is possible. The best thing to do is to stay grounded, and not psych out about it. It will eventually go away. If SWIY still feels that something is wrong after several months, then he can seek aid.

Moreover, LSD can change someone in various ways. Sir Tokesalot has learned a new appreciation for life, clichéd as it may sound, and has certainly witnessed his mannerisms and behavior change over periods of LSD use. Drugs like this can undo behavioral imprinting, and because they're such intense and potentially traumatic experiences, can do some imprinting of their own. The less mentally prepared one is, and the less self-analytical one is, the more of a shock these drugs can be to their psyche (which may not be such a bad thing after all).

Lastly: one should beware of the idea that taking just "one tab" will not give someone a serious experience, because Sir Tokesalot has been able to find some seriously heavy-duty tabs! There can be anything on a tab, from 70 to 500 mics of LSD, or even other things like DOx compounds and various tryptamines. The trick here is to start slow and use a low starter dose if one is even slightly unsure of the source.

[silentsonnet]

when the shaman ceremoniously embarks on an entheogenically enhanced journey, he is aware that when he returns, he will not be the same. the experience will have changed him, allowed him to see through different eyes a world that will forever be imprinted in his memory banks.

the shaman considers this to be a gift. he does not fear the new mindset. he does not shy away from what he has learned. he does not seek to undo that which has been done.

this is the same lesson experienced universally through the act of living. for the person who witnesses a life-changing event, he will forever be shaped by that which he has seen. to deny that fact is to deny the person that he has become with the passing of time.

these reasons are why i would suggest exercising extreme caution in the choices one makes. not everyone desires such a spiritual experience, and therefore not everyone finds the value in the lasting impression such an experience brings. BUT, when one has already made this choice, it is worthless to resist and valuable to proceed forward with the ACCEPTANCE that change is a part of earthly existence. it is most valuable to embrace the changes that have occurred with the same gratitude and appreciation displayed by the shaman. only then can the perception of a "burden" be transformed into a "gift".

Reputation Comments on this post:

excellent post, keep up the good work

[AceOvArts]

SWIM remembers his first time though it was long long agow in a place far far away. SWIM was NEVER the same again. I dont believe anyone can return to that same person after such a huge experience of your first acid trip. Its like jumping from an aeroplane and freefalling, how can you ever be the same. The experience will stay with you whatever way it went. Some will never take acid again, some want to shout on the rooftops about how wonderful it is and all the levels of excitement and fear that are in between.
What one shouldnt do is try and fight the realisation that one took acid and it altered them. This doesnt mean they are altered in some way that they are less person than they were or altered them in a way they will always have a nagging fear that they are different.
I think what Panthers007 said holds true, one should relax and it will pass, its only when you do relax that you will leave behind all the anxieties you have at the moment and return to normal.
SWIM knows what SWIY is going through, he has felt the same way, but it will pass and though knowing SWIY took LSD isnt ever going away is it ?
SWIM used to think he was never going to return from an acid trip and that he would be caught up in a neverending swirl that is a madness, but LSD wears off (for most) and one does get back to normal after as long as a week for him sometimes. What one shouldnt do is get themselves wrapped up in the anxieties that consume the mind, stop thinking about it and get on with your life and after a month youll wonder what all the fuss was about.
Depersonalization can happen with many different drugs too, not just LSD, SWIM knows this first hand also as he was depersonalized (that is he felt like he was watching himself living his life from over his own shoulder, if that makes sense) after a heavy friendship with MaryJane, SWIM smoked himself to the doctors that promptly told him it was not caused by smoking weed but actually by stress. Though SWIM didnt agree with the doc it was enough to knock his brain out of that state of mind and he returned to normal.

[Burnt]

Stop being a baby its just acid. Its all in the head. Unless it was some other chemical sold as acid.

Reputation Comments on this post:

	wouldn't really call this contributing to the thread,
	" Stop being a baby its just acid. Its all in the head" is an uncaring, unhelpful reply that could easily dama...
	Extremely unhelpful
	Extremely unhelpful and insulting comments. Think before posting.
	What a ridiculous post. Seems very doubtful that SWIY has ever done acid.

[tinytom]

Stop being a baby its just acid. Its all in the head. Unless it was some other chemical sold as acid.

true its just another drug. one of the side effects is that it makes you think alot.

this statement will annoy some people i am aware but swim has taken acid many times up to 6 decent dosed blotters and has yet to have a spiritual experience though his whole body was trembeling.

swim also does not belive in bad trips. get out of the situation. get comfortablr and flow with it.

swim is pretty disappointed by the visuals with acid atm anyway seems to be the same thing he has yet to see his robotic arm so to speak....

his previous trips were a little too close to each other for swim liking. this is maybe why he is feeling this way.

[xShr00mzZ]

wow deep SWIM never thought of it that way...he appreciates all of your help.

xShr00mzZ added 3 Minutes and 56 Seconds later...

Originally Posted by AceOvArts

SWIM remembers his first time though it was long long agow in a place far far away. SWIM was NEVER the same again. I dont believe anyone can return to that same person after such a huge experience of your first acid trip. Its like jumping from an aeroplane and freefalling, how can you ever be the same. The experience will stay with you whatever way it went. Some will never take acid again, some want to shout on the rooftops about how wonderful it is and all the levels of excitement and fear that are in between.
What one shouldnt do is try and fight the realisation that one took acid and it altered them. This doesnt mean they are altered in some way that they are less person than they were or altered them in a way they will always have a nagging fear that they are different.
I think what Panthers007 said holds true, one should relax and it will pass, its only when you do relax that you will leave behind all the anxieties you have at the moment and return to normal.
SWIM knows what SWIY is going through, he has felt the same way, but it will pass and though knowing SWIY took LSD isnt ever going away is it ?
SWIM used to think he was never going to return from an acid trip and that he would be caught up in a neverending swirl that is a madness, but LSD wears off (for most) and one does get back to normal after as long as a week for him sometimes. What one shouldnt do is get themselves wrapped up in the anxieties that consume the mind, stop thinking about it and get on with your life and after a month youll wonder what all the fuss was about.
Depersonalization can happen with many different drugs too, not just LSD, SWIM knows this first hand also as he was depersonalized (that is he felt like he was watching himself living his life from over his own shoulder, if that makes sense) after a heavy friendship with MaryJane, SWIM smoked himself to the doctors that promptly told him it was not caused by smoking weed but actually by stress. Though SWIM didnt agree with the doc it was enough to knock his brain out of that state of mind and he returned to normal.

well it has been almost three months after SWIMs first and only experience and he still feels indifferent. SWIM does think about it constantly

[Beta]

Each time swim does alice, he feels different after as well: Better, more open, ...

[Burnt]

yes i mean that in a nice way too (didn't mean to sound rude)! i find the worst problems people have with acid are really just in their head and if you relax it often will go away. bad trips do happen and they suck but it helps do realize acid can not cause structural brain damage. the psychological issues that can potentially arise are all in the mind which the individual has control.

[Wierd Logic]

Originally Posted by tinytom

true its just another drug. one of the side effects is that it makes you think alot.

this statement will annoy some people i am aware but swim has taken acid many times up to 6 decent dosed blotters and has yet to have a spiritual experience though his whole body was trembeling.

swim also does not belive in bad trips. get out of the situation. get comfortablr and flow with it.

swim is pretty disappointed by the visuals with acid atm anyway seems to be the same thing he has yet to see his robotic arm so to speak....

his previous trips were a little too close to each other for swim liking. this is maybe why he is feeling this way.

Can you please not brush aside acid as a minor thing? It might be for you, but for the OP its obviously not. As for being disappointed, eat a ten-strip of good quality blotter then get back to me.
And to the OP, it sucks that you've got a bad after burn, some people just get them; its probably a sign you shouldn't take psychedelics, acid at any rate. Monkey has always managed to find his after-feelings (which have never gone on a long as swiys) a new perspective on life, and a beneficial thing.

[ADVOR]

Type "derealization" and/or "depersonalization" into Google.

[MindNRA]

Everyone here who has tried acid knows what you are talking about. And the answer is no, you will not be the same as what you were before you tried it. That's the whole point.

Acid expands your mind and gives you a different perspective. Now that you have seen a different perspective of reality and the universe, you can't quite say okey, that all was not real and forget about it. You could but you would be lying to yourself.

LSD changes your perspective on the world and that will remain with you forever. You are a different person, learn to live with it and enjoy it.

But your answer is NO, you will never ever be absolutely the same. Stop looking at change from bad perspective.

MindNRA added 4 Minutes and 55 Seconds later...

Also, not all acid trips are the same. Swims first one was a revolutionary one and he asked the same exact question from his guide: will I be the same as I was someday and I got NO. Not quite the same.

Acid trips can be just like ecstasy trips, mostly about visuals, sounds, pleasure or if you are lucky they can be about something far more then you can imagine.

[Sir_Geo]

SWIM knows what swim's talking about. SWIM took acid twice in two weeks(one tab then two weeks later aprox 2.5). After the first time, swim did notice something different about the world and felt like he wouldnt be the same. Then two weeks later SWIM dropped 2.5 tabs and then wound up in a state of complete depersonalization/dissociation(similar to the effects of DXM) for two months(post-trip). SWIM did alot of thinking in those two months and thinks he's a better person for it. Though swim still can't look at his reflection without a minor twinge...

[Lobsang]

There are many manifestations of what is called "HPPD". But for the most part changes are in visual perception. Not voices that tell you in the middle of the night to get up and stab your family to death and bury their bodies under the Mimosa tree because a raven named Baby Jesus told you to. So relax and enjoy the changes. It is all that can be done.

[Songcycle67]

I'm gonna go out on a very, very sturdy limb here and say that this is either HPPD, as stated above, that has alarmed the sensory nervous system and thusly caused anxiety in the individual or, most probably, unresolved issues encountered during the experience (either consciously or unconsciously).

I'm not saying that it's entirely impossible that this individual has psychosis, it's just extremely extremely unlikely. t's important to remember that, as has been said in this thread, issues that go undealt with after the experience often cause more anxiety and trouble than the experience itself.

It's important to reach deep inside and come to terms with anything that SWIY feels they may have become aware of during the LSD experience. I don't mean things like coming to realize that god is a butterfly or that your hands control the sun, I mean things that actually affect their lives: issues with parents, friends, even drugs.

Also just as a sidenote: in America and Britain, societies built on the foundations of Christ-related guilt, have stigmatized these substances since the Spanish first entered the realm of the Maya and were horrified to see these heathens ingesting mushrooms and dancing around the fires of satan all deranged. After the Spanish killed moctezuma and took over, the penalty for eating such mushrooms was being gutted while still alive. And many were. So, during the trip itself, there is a very deep-seated unconscious stigmatism that can arise inside a person who feels they are fairly ready for the experience.

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Some wise words and an an interesting snippet on the Maya