Recovery- getting through rough patch

[cyndi]

Seems just to be an ongoing process. One just has to remember triggers and deal with them accordingly. Swim will elaborate. She was just having a rough time last night. Out of work, unemployment jerking her around and jobs are not plentiful here. It just sucks. She sometimes feels like just giving up and getting high. Spousal issues are really bad too, hubby is threatening to toss her out of the house, without money, well it won't be a good thing. Swim is very worried. I pmed several people on my friend's list for help and one very sweet lady, sweetsugar helped me through it. Major big love to her. She is a true friend who does not have an agenda, very sweet person. I love her to death.

Reputation Comments on this post:

recovery is a long road but your doing really well hun :)

[tyrus568]

That is good to hear. Sorry no one has replied to your post in like a week.

Do you have good spots throughout the day or is it constantly bad? SWIM hopes you have some bright patches here and there to help SWIY get through, bright patches he think he lacks and worries about that...

SWIM often has a hard time being "talked down". Talking doesn't seem to help him much, he's fiending too badly. No distractions seem to help - well, very little. Is there anything SWIY could share on how to cope?

I try to walk when I can, but it doesn't help. Positive thoughts, like SWIM is going to get through this, don't help much either, because he doesn't believe it, but he keeps trying anyway.

HOPE is sown only from love... here's hoping it catches root, and grows.

[oggy]

Originally Posted by tyrus568

I try to walk when I can, but it doesn't help. Positive thoughts, like SWIM is going to get through this, don't help much either, because he doesn't believe it, but he keeps trying anyway.

Yes positive thought do help, they've helped Swim recover so much faster from a big drug problem, but by saying Swiy doesn't believe it, you've just proved to yourself negative thoughts makes things worse.

Thoughts that heal: I really do love this quote.

Take control of your mind. Positive thinking.

When I observe the inner world of my thoughts and feelings, I can develop new ways of responding to situations and events which help to keep new me in a positive frame of mind. I may see for example that whereas becoming upset and fearful about ill-health only makes it worse, a period of illness could offer me a space to get off life's roller coaster for a while, to rest, and look at how I have been living. Then, if I'm honest, I may see ways of improving my attitudes and actions. That realisation in itself will bring fresh hope, and happiness. As long as I keep looking inside, I really do have a choice. Why choose worry, which will harm me? Why not opt for a positive approach, which will uplift me?

Hope this might help cyndi, like it helped Swim.

[Sportsguy86]

Honestly, I really think clean time under one's belt is the main thing that allows people to get on with normal lives and stop obsessing over drugs. Clean time allows the body to completely recover, and the brain to re-balance, allows the persons to develop new lifestyle habits, and gives the person confidence that they can do it. After a little while, you just start to forget about it because it's no longer an immediate survival threat to you, and we are survival creatures. There is always the possibility of relapse though, so you can never totally forget, and always have to remember why you quit in the first place.

I'm not sure how far into recovery you are--but generally I think after a few weeks, one should feel much better mentally and physically and feel in no way dependent on the drug. They might still crave it out of boredom or remembering how good it is--and I think the way to handle this is to pick up new hobbies and get excited about other things. Falling in love can help alot. Trying to advance your career. Anything really that you enjoy and makes you driven and excited.

Good luck.

[sweetsugar]

Originally Posted by Sportsguy86

Honestly, I really think clean time under one's belt is the main thing that allows people to get on with normal lives and stop obsessing over drugs. Clean time allows the body to completely recover, and the brain to re-balance, allows the persons to develop new lifestyle habits, and gives the person confidence that they can do it. After a little while, you just start to forget about it because it's no longer an immediate survival threat to you, and we are survival creatures. There is always the possibility of relapse though, so you can never totally forget, and always have to remember why you quit in the first place.

I'm not sure how far into recovery you are--but generally I think after a few weeks, one should feel much better mentally and physically and feel in no way dependent on the drug. They might still crave it out of boredom or remembering how good it is--and I think the way to handle this is to pick up new hobbies and get excited about other things. Falling in love can help alot. Trying to advance your career. Anything really that you enjoy and makes you driven and excited.

Good luck.

Really good post

Swim awoke this morning and after some pondering [ouch] she thought- wow shes in a great mood, and in the right mind set to be tripping her tits off, considering the weathers great n' all... she obviously wont be, as she is too trying to keep/have some good ole clean time under her belt ~ and leaving pot smoking until late evening - this is something swim wont give up yet (at the risk of sounding like a complete hypocrite,sp?) smoking pot is not cause for concern as shes been heavily smoking for years.

Anyway.. its not swims drug of choice or drug that she were addicted to that she craves! it'll be any drug, a different day, a different high...

BUT right now, swims high on life and thats the way its staying for now

[methMADMAN]

Originally Posted by Sportsguy86

Honestly, I really think clean time under one's belt is the main thing that allows people to get on with normal lives and stop obsessing over drugs. Clean time allows the body to completely recover, and the brain to re-balance, allows the persons to develop new lifestyle habits, and gives the person confidence that they can do it. After a little while, you just start to forget about it because it's no longer an immediate survival threat to you, and we are survival creatures. There is always the possibility of relapse though, so you can never totally forget, and always have to remember why you quit in the first place.

I'm not sure how far into recovery you are--but generally I think after a few weeks, one should feel much better mentally and physically and feel in no way dependent on the drug. They might still crave it out of boredom or remembering how good it is--and I think the way to handle this is to pick up new hobbies and get excited about other things. Falling in love can help alot. Trying to advance your career. Anything really that you enjoy and makes you driven and excited.

Good luck.

I think there is a lot of good stuff in this post as well, but the one point I would emphasize is that in nearly all cases it is essential to get away from drug using friends. I don't suggest you decide to hate people you care about, but they are in the grip of a deadly malady just as you are and no matter how you try nobody can convince another to quit.

The average addict simply has to divorce themselves of such influences or they will inevitably relapse. This is one reason why support groups can be so instrumental in helping. They allow the user to be around others who've broken the addiction and can help them through, and help the recovering addict to network with others and develop a new set of friends. One a person is strong enough it's ok to have some contact with some of the old crowd, but most find little interest in doing so. Personally I still love those I used to use with, but now that I am clean we have little in common. I still see some and talk, but it's not the same, and drugs are the priority of their lives, yet I have moved on. If ever they seek recovery I will be overjoyed, and willing to help any way I can, but no amount of me nagging will help.

I think it's wrong to turn your back on any friend and it's no help to them to see you look down on them for something you have in common, but contact at first should be slim to none, until such a time as you are on solid ground.

Reputation Comments on this post:

Good post

[cyndi]

Oh very very rough patch again. I just wish swim was normal whatever that is. It seems she now has a stigma and is unemployable. Well with idle time and a son using heroine, it is just bad. Swim is considering getting out of this situation. That means just leaving. Oh she doesn't know what else to say.

[tyrus568]

Thanks for your reply, Sportsguy.

I wish it was like that. A 6-week period of abstinence leaves me feeling even worse than before and in no way better or less dependent. One of the main issues is clinical depression - if you have it (which I imagine a good number of addicts do) than it is very difficult, even after a couple of months quit, to pick up new hobbies or get excited. One of the very symptoms of clinical depression is the lack of excitement or motivation to do things you once found enjoyable. This is what can make it so difficult... the boredom along with an apathetic world view caused by the depression make it so much harder to just get "involved" with something, anything.

I agree about your points, though. I realize that spending too much time at home is a very bad place to be for an addict, and interaction helps things a lot... but with social anxiety it's really hard to just make yourself interact. With no license and in a dense suburb where it's difficult to get anywhere on foot, a license should be among my first priorities, and has been for years (lol). Maybe a job at the local library would help... especially if one doesn't have to deal with other people so much. It adds lots of stress for me, though I am very good with people.

Clean time is something I have an issue with mainly because I feel that I self-medicate for my depression. I'm concerned that my anxiety and depression will be too much to deal with "cold turkey". I am on medication and see a psychiatrist; I have been on six antidepressants, to no effect so far. It's this lack of support that biases me against totally quitting.

It sucks!

[cyndi]

Swim agrees, the more clean time the better one has chances against rough spots or times swim wants to use. Swim had a setback, learned a hard lesson, and is currently doing much better. As she said it just seems to be an ongoing process where she is learning and recovering more every day.

Swim can't self medicate, that was her hard lesson. Back on the right track she goes.