So yesterday swim had a rough but interesting experience. SWIM used to use DXM quite a bit but stopped after what it was doing to him. SWIM had a moment of relapse after several months, and is quite glad the way it happened.
SWIM basically only involves himself in dissociatives, so of course salvia was a substance swim also chose to use excessively. Well yesterday, a very happy turn of events came swim's way.
SWIM made some dxm extract and consumed it....problem was...it probably absorbed to fast or something and swim vomited like 3/4 of it. It was a sad that this happened because the trip was weak, just a body high, a complete waste of time and health to swim. So swim did something he never does in his life usually...he made a decision spontaneously.
DXM happens to numb (or lose contact altogether is what it felt like) of a lot of parts of the body. SWIM's trachea didn't hurt anymore, and breathing was easy...this hinted that swim should smoke something...(ideas). So swim tried the salvia on dxm.
The experience was so incredibly moving (out of body, salvia "object trip" and a flashback) that swim doesn't think that he will ever consume a drug again because it would only taint the majestic experience he had yesterday. This trip not only was just moving, but it was symbolic towards all of swim's previous trips (most of swim's previous trips were failures in getting anywhere). This trip meant so much to swim, and swim realizes how many times he had to fail to get this to work.
DXM trips and salvia trips were all crappy, swim almost had legal trouble obtaining certain ingredients, swim messed up preparation and consumption....and after years of attempts...swim had to FAIL AT HIS LOWEST POINT to achieve the powerful experience he wished for.
What an awkward coincidence and twist of things, can anyone relate? SWIM feels like all the failures he had amounted to something, were all part of something. Kind of a cool way of looking at life.