It robs you of your very soul and you don't even notice.

[Sky Walker]

Sorry. Seems your taking good care of her.

[dogzz]

Swim thinks she should be just told flat out "Found the coat or not, it is not yours, how do you feel when you set things down and they vanish? " You want to help her, and she is a lucky girl to have you. Using this one incident as an example; by just blowing it off and taking her story is that not the same as saying what she did was cool? From what you are saying, she does have clothes to stay warm in. So why take it? seems like she needs to be taught a few things about doing the right thing. Swim would make HER take the coat back, Have HER explain she "found it" and didnt feel right keeping it. As long as she can "just get by" nothin is going to change. She is only holding herself to one accountability,.....and that is getting that next shard, the next bowl, or bump of meth.......other than that? nothin else really matters. So what to do?? come down on her? she'll split......stop buying her stuff...she'll just steal it. Basically you are screwed, technically she is, but she doesnt care....as long as more meth is in the picture somehow. About the only thing you can do is allow her to know you do love and care for her, Be there for her if, and when she decides she cant keep going the way she is,...and if she decides to accept your help she has to be completely accountable for HER actions.....With luck and a prayer, she''ll begin to tire of the life she's leading. All the meth in the world is never going to be enough to keep going. Even the purest, highest quality meth wont do a thing for her eventually.......and that is kind of the kicker to a meth addict, It sure was for swim. The rush is gone, no longer the enjoyable high, it is only a matter of doing more to just feel somewhat normal? maybe a step up from feeling dead? She will get to thinking about the family that cares about her. The clothes, nice, new and clean you provided.... a clean warm dry place to sleep.

You can not control her, make her stop....but you can control what goes on in your life and home....she wants your help? well it's your house, your rules, it's a fine line between enabling, and driving one away......you need to be enough a part of her life she can see that life can be better. only she can make the choice to do it.

Swim read thru these posts, see's all this bickering about addiction, disease, statements as fact and where's the proof. It strikes swim as funny how people have such a hard time understanding another, just because they dont experience the same things. Addiction DOES fit the definition of disease, that was proven. So what about meth robbing us of our souls?? Some people will never even try meth, others willl do it once or twice and let it go, then there are those swim has known many of, fairly regular users, but what swim feels most of us would view as "in control" ya know? just weekends, or a few times a month maybe not every month. More power to them, Swim wishes like hell he fit that category. Then there's the last group.....those that meth does in a way steal our souls. Sure we can all agree meth is an inanimate object, has no actual power of its own. Swim is not a scientist, nor a chemist, nor psychiatrist, but has done the research, knows how meth affects the brain, in both short term and long term use. The info is out there, look it up, swim's not gonna bother with that now. Swim does have 35 years practical experience as a meth addict. 2 years clean now, actually 3 with a minor ooops in there. Swim was actually a mellower guy while using. It was when swim was without that he bit the heads off of anyone and everyone. Swim finds no joy, no happiness without meth, now he needs prescription meds to get any sort of life. Swim actuall thought he was doin better and stopped taking the anti-d's swim wasnt even aware he had become that angry bitter man again....back to anti-d's.

Swim does not need proof what meth did to him, he lives it. It would be nice not being dependant on a drug, even a prescription one.......but thats what meth does to a bunch of us, and it seems only we understand the power meth can have over people. Sure at the beginning we had a choice to not use meth, we could of stopped and been fine. But that first few times were pure heaven, thats what meth does...it floods the pleasure and reward centers of the brain.....it was like taking all of the greatest pleasures, the insanely happiest of times.....the greatest sex ever the most intense love ever felt all rolled into one then multiplied by 10, even more. Then without meth ALL of that is taken away.....no joy , no love.....no nothing..... even though it is all in the head.....there is a bio-chemical reason for it....without more meth it's like a living death.

We can not simply stop using and merely wait to feel better. Just as we had to go after getting the meth, we have to seek out ways to get our lives back. Swim could give a rats ass if you do not agree, or you need to see some form of "proof" swim thinks it is a shame 35 years of active meth addiction didnt come with a degree. Yet swim has dealt with many a psychologist and psychiatrist that have NO clue but they have that degree....must make them special eh? Being fair...there are a lot of excellent therapists and doctors. merely making the point that just because someone says something doesnt mean its right, or wrong....but life's experiences ARE the greatest teachers....swim will listen to someone who has been there much closer than to someone who just supports what they say with documents.

swim got a bit carried away, sorry. Trying to help someone stop using meth is something swim feels very passionate about. Ya'all might say it is how swim is trying to get his soul back. 53 years old with nothing to show but 35 years of heavy meth use. Gotta make the best, of what swim knows best.

Reputation Comments on this post:

awesome post, excellent points, very well explained with facts and personal experience, stating view and differences wit...

[Jason132435]

I'm pretty new to this forum, came on to find out a couple things. I didn't read all the posts in this thread, just the first one.

First off I was an addict 5 years ago, got in a bunch of trouble, and gave it up. I remember coming out of jail, with only the clothes on my back. My GOOD METH BUDDIES did me the favor of cleaning out my storage unit, so all i had to my name was what i went to jail with. A year prior i had lost my 100k a year business i worked very hard to build. Talk about sneaking up on me, Boom within a year of doing meth everyday, i lost my business and resorted to crime. I'm very lucky I didn't end up dead or in jail. To be 100% honest, i has OK< until i started doing it everyday. I did it only on the weekends and would take monday, tuesday, and wednesday to recover, then i was fine, i had 2 good days to grow my business. Started doing it everyday and it didn't take long to lose everything.

Alright, i'm going to go create a thread and hopefully get a couple answers.

[Jason132435]

Oh yea, Who's SWIM? Everyone seems to be refering to themselves as swim. I'm new, please explain, thank you!!

Happy Holidays

[dogzz]

Read the forum rules. you'll find the explanation there

[Chefko]

one trie and you ll always do it,swim would never touch that stuff

[LimbFromLimb91]

i hear ya. even regular amphetamines turn me into a shitty person. i'm prescribed 20 mg adderall instant release, and get extremely angry, irrational, and violent when i'm coming down (especially after an all-nighter on that stuff).

[cyndi]

Dogzz the story is touching and so true. Swim has also struggled with meth/speed addiction for 22 years and also has suffered much to the same degree as swiy. She has lost so much, her job, kids, self esteem, and love of life in general. She is slowly but steadily getting her life back together but things aren't falling into place as fast as she would like them to. She has also faced some really bad times here lately and prays she can remain on the right track.

Swim loves this thread and rereads it when cravings hit. It reminds her how indeed meth can rob ones soul and destroy her life. Good stuff!

I want to add some negative feedback for all to see:
"Or it could be little Johnny who's never touched tweak but takes offense at the arrogance of those who spout on about being knowledgeable yet fail to provide any actual evidence to support their argument instead choosing to belittle those oppose them. "

That was some negative feedback. Good grief after fighting meth addiction for 22 years, swim believes she has too much knowledge on this. That was a terrible thing to say. My grandma said you have nothing nice don't say it at all. Certainly there are choices in life, if Johnny wants to use meth, that is his choice. Swim just hopes to help not get ugly remarks for helping someone who may need some encouragement. That was very unfair!!!!!

[cyndi]

Delete, don't want back to back posts. This should be deleted.

[MrG]

The trouble with all this "just one hit and your hooked for life" propaganda is simply this:

Someone who grows up with that mantra being all they hear about meth may well end up trying it once and, having realised that after their one hit they are not hooked, addicted or heading to jail, might actually then dismiss this ridiculous notion as being complete bullshit. This then leads them to maybe try it again another time. Then they try it a few more times and a few more times and then they *are* heading for trouble because their mind has already been closed to the danger due to the over-reaction of their peers at the start.

How about trying to view things from the common perspective regarding any drug of this forum in that, whilst *nobody* will argue that d-methamphetamine is not a powerful psychostimulant that *can* rather easily become a problematic addiction, it is still absolutely critical that we are educated and informed about it rather then simply scared off from it.

SWIY may choose not to try meth because they have learned the facts about just how slippery a slide it can be and that would be a good thing.

But if SWIY chooses not to try meth because they have had their heads filled with scare stories, they may well have their heads rapidly emptied by a "buddy" who has tried meth and is *still* "trying" meth who convinces them to "try" meth and then we are at the top of that slippery slide again, but he has no way of knowing it because he threw the baby out with the bathwater when he found he wasn't immediately cast down into hell after doing it for the first time.

[Dexyfiend]

This is a BRILLIANT thread.

I'm new to this site and I've bookmarked this thread as it has some gold advice and very interesting points and points of view.

Swim is 27 and has had amphetamine (not meth) problems for the last 12yrs. Dexies are swims amphetamine of choice as he is well aware of the dangerousness of meth as a level up in fuckedupness when it comes to uppers.

The title of this thread really caught my eye as swim and his mates generally refer to meth as 'the soul destroyer'.

Theres alot swim could write about here but, alas, swim has to do some things right now (no, not scoring drugs) but will crap on a bit later