Opinions - Lorazepam versus alprazolam (or others.)

[Underorbit]

I used to take .5mg of Ativan (Lorazepam) as needed for insomnia and anxiety. However, it wouldn't work, and my doctor suggested I just take more. He would have me coming back every other week for a refill, and had me prescribed 2mg two or three times a day as needed over the next month or two. The only bad thing is it made me incredibly sluggish, especially at work where my anxiety attacks frequent (the GM and her "crew" love to push everything from their jobs to blame on the supervisors/associates.) I became to just stop taking them because I was having trouble functioning at work correctly, and didn't use them much for insomnia, but when I did they worked rather well. I went to him and asked for something a bit stronger than alprazolam, and weaker than lorazepam, that may take the "edge" off of anxiety, and a bit stronger doses, could help me with insomnia as needed. Without hesitating, he turned me down and told me lorazepam was as strong as he could go (Doesn't make much sense to me either.)

Well, after a long, long break from lorazepam from decreased need, anxiety and insomnia started flaring up again. I haven't been to my doctor in about a year to a year and a half, and I wish to go back to him to ask for benzodiazepines again. My thoughts are pointing toward alprazolam, something that I've tried once in the past, alleviating anxiety without too much sedation (seemed easier to control for a comfort level) and aiding me in sleep when needed. My questions revolve around three things: do you think he'll turn me away since I haven't been there in awhile, or he'll take my money and give me as a please? And do you think I should try for something a little more? The last question is do you think he'll go with seeing me every month or two? As I really can't afford the whole $90 doctor visits every other week.

Thanks for the help to all whom post. (Also for the past as well.)