Methamphetamine addict having difficulties with suspicious mom

[tweak123]

swim's mom has been getting suspicious of her use. she gets frequent nosebleeds, her mother makes comments about her having dark circles under her eyes, she's lost 40 lbs in the past few months..and the kicker is swims mother's brother used to be a cokehead. so..she knows the symptoms. swim is considering telling her mother but first of all she doesn't want to stop..secondly she doesnt want to disappoint her..thirdly she doesnt want to go to rehab (not only because it sucks but also the fact that its the 2nd semester of her sr year in high school and shes almost done)..and doesnt want her mother to worry about her when she goes off to college. would it be wise to just fess up and get it out in the open or do you think swim should just cut down for a while...and let it be?

[Pinkavvy]

Obviously, cut down for a while, if swiy can.

[Forthesevenlakes]

The best option would be to quit on SWIY's own, and maybe confess to the problem only after SWIY has been clean for a while and taken steps not to relapse. Communication with parents is extremely important in SWIM's book, and SWIY's mom, having seen a similar issue before, is probably already wise to the problem and would be willing to help SWIY if she reaches out.

Even if SWIY doesn't want to quit, the consequences of use SWIY has already gone through seem pretty severe. Maybe it's time to evaluate why SWIY is using, and what other non-drug means SWIY could use to obtain the state of mind she desires or receives from meth. After a period of being clean, then sit down and evaluate if SWIY wants to continue to use meth or other stimulants, and if so, how she can limit or control her use. There is a good chance that SWIY may not want to use again, or that she will realize there is no way to use without resuming the addiction, in which case, she should stay away from stimulants.

Senior year of high school and the beginning of college are pretty busy times, and SWIM understands if rehab might seem too consuming of one's time and resources, but SWIM also thinks SWIY can stop on her own. Enlist the help of some trusted friends and feel free to post whatever questions or concerns SWIY has on the forum, also look through the addiction section and see what others have to say about quitting meth. Here's a good thread full of advice on quitting and staying clean.

So SWIM's advice, basically, is to stop use immediately, and get healthy again. If SWIY wishes to tell her mother at some point, or wants her mom's help, there's no shame in doing so.

Good luck to you and please keep us informed as to how it goes.

[Nicaine]

SWIM has quit various stimulants before... not meth but crack, powder coke & others... it's always seemed easy to him to kick stimulants (compared to other drugs), even a major relief in many ways. It's the actual decision to kick that's hard to come by.

As far as cutting down, SWIM's speaking only for himself -- aside from extended breaks with no use whatsoever, the whole notion of cutting down/controlling stimulant use is a fantasy. One that has kept SWIM going at it longer than he otherwise would have, chasing some dream of control. But give it a try, it could be different for SWIY...

[Myzel]

Swim agrees that "whole notion of cutting down/controlling stimulant use is a fantasy." It's either all or nothing swim thinks thats for pretty much everybody. It's up to swiy what you are going to do but swim guarantees that if swiy continues to use meth that it will work it self out on its own sooner or later. Whether its sooner or later maybe be differnt from person to person

[Nicaine]

Originally Posted by Myzel

Swim agrees that "whole notion of cutting down/controlling stimulant use is a fantasy." It's either all or nothing swim thinks thats for pretty much everybody.

SWIM's younger brother has the ability to get a gram or 8-ball of coke, party for a few hours, then put it away for the night & go to bed -- something that always made SWIM's eyes bug out in disbelief (he always kept at it until it was gone, even if that meant 48 or 72 hours).

But SWIM's brother is strange that way... he also smokes about a half pack of cigarettes/day, but can just refrain from smoking for a day or two if he wants - no big deal. It's a pretty unusual thing, but it does exist...

[tweak123]

swim has officially gone her first full day without any ice and feels like complete shit. she has cramps and a headache...is depressed...broke her shower door becuase she got pissed and slammed it too hard..i guess swim gets what she deserves. swim doesnt know how long she can do this, but either way she is tired and heading to bed.

[Nicaine]

Originally Posted by tweak123

swim has officially gone her first full day without any ice and feels like complete shit. she has cramps and a headache...is depressed...broke her shower door becuase she got pissed and slammed it too hard..i guess swim gets what she deserves. swim doesnt know how long she can do this, but either way she is tired and heading to bed.

She can do it forever; but the question is, will she want to? SWIY should keep in mind that these symptoms will diminish after 72 hours, and probably be gone after a week or two. If they aren't gone within two weeks, an antidepressant would be a good idea (and is actually not a bad idea now, if SWIY could be sure they don't use on top of it).

[Myzel]

Great job on swiy first day day off of methamphetamine. The next couple of days and weeks are not going to be eazy. And to be honest swiy must realize that the odds are stacked against swiy without some type of support. Maybe swiy should check into some local programs or possibly NA meetings if swiy truly wants the best chance of beating this addiction . Swim understands that not everybody's the same and people handle situations in a different ways. But in swims experience with amphetamines swiy may need to learn and get some tools to succed...Swim ended a very long period use of methamphetamine so it can be done but it wont be eazy but maybe in swiy situation it will be worth it..

[Dr.Jones]

Your mother already knows, and might even use herself.

1. Well, if you are NOT GOING TO STOP, rehab isn't the magic switch to make you stop. If you are NOT GOING TO STOP, then you are just going to keep using regardless of this advice.
2.Your mother probaly worries a great deal about her daughter and wants nothing but the best for her. She may or may not be the best person for the job, but her intentions are good. That said, irrational mother and drugs can get out of fucking control in a split second.
3. Rehab isnt a magic switch. It does alot of people some good to 'get out of it' for a while, and even kind of a 'come to jesus' meeting for some people. But quite possibly nothing will replace your craving for meth. But I promise 6 months down the road, you won't be thinking about it.

[woodrod]

Swim Knows exactly what you going through. Swim recommends stopping cold turkey on a friday after scoring lots of benzo's (klonopin is what swim used) tell your mom swiy is sick and sleep off the worst of it over the weekend. Its hard to OD on klonopin so take as much as needed to sleep as much as possible. It will also help the withdrawls slightly. But be prepared to still have the headaches and cravings on monday but they will be manageable just dont relapse until you put back on some weight or never (recommended) or at least two weeks without it. then cut back use from where you were before. Thats what swim did hope it works out for you. good luck.

[Beltane]

When SWIM quit meth, he barely got out of bed for at least a month.

As for telling the mother, do not. It would be selfish. Right now the daughter is suffering, but the mother is at least somewhat successfully lying to herself. If the daughter confesses, she won't have to live with the lies, but the mother won't be able to lie to herself any more and would probably be miserable. It's the daughter's fault, let her be the one to suffer in silence.

- Beltane

[chAos]

Originally Posted by Beltane

When SWIM quit meth, he barely got out of bed for at least a month.

As for telling the mother, do not. It would be selfish. Right now the daughter is suffering, but the mother is at least somewhat successfully lying to herself. If the daughter confesses, she won't have to live with the lies, but the mother won't be able to lie to herself any more and would probably be miserable. It's the daughter's fault, let her be the one to suffer in silence.

- Beltane

and you think the mother will be happy to see her daughter go trough withdrawel without telling her what's wrong?
Really, if swiy decides she want's to stop i think it's best that she tells her mother.

[~lostgurl~]

If SWIY is 100% determined to quit, then telling SWIY's mother can really help, but if SWIY thinks that this is just another bump on the rollercoaster and really does not think they will stay off meth even with SWIY's mother's help then dont put her through the heartbreak of it all.

[Nicaine]

Originally Posted by Beltane

When SWIM quit meth, he barely got out of bed for at least a month.

Sounds like more of a case of clinical depression than actual withdrawal symptoms.

Originally Posted by ~lostgurl~

If SWIY is 100% determined to quit, then telling SWIY's mother can really help, but if SWIY thinks that this is just another bump on the rollercoaster and really does not think they will stay off meth even with SWIY's mother's help then dont put her through the heartbreak of it all.

SWIM agrees with this, at least in principle... the only disagreement is that "determination" is really not enough, in his opinion. One has to have lost most of the desire to keep using, or even become repelled by the thought of getting high. Resisting stimulants through "willpower" is a guaranteed way to fail, at least for SWIM.

[tweak123]

well it's been 5 days and swim is still feeling like shit...but its not as bad. she still hasn't told her mother because she just doesnt know how. her boyfriend was very supportive and has been with her almost every hour of these last few days.

One has to have lost most of the desire to keep using, or even become repelled by the thought of getting high.

Swim understands this completely...she was to the point where she was just disgusted with herself and it wasn't fun for her anymore. After these 5 days she has a lot more confidence than she did the first day..she thinks she can stay clean; hopefully forever. We'll see, swim is trying not to think too far ahead in the future and just take things one day at a time. it's working so far.

[stoneinfocus]

Some hydrolized protein shake might help, ... the aminoacids will get to he brain quickly and are being processed to needful neurotransmitters and hormones, despite having a tranquilizing effect on their own, plus it might help against malnutrition, that´s been taking place. Taurine might help against cramps and overall stamina, as well as hydration -some bodybuilders are using it against cramping undr a clenbuterol cycle.

[Each Hit]

the longer swiy goes, the easier it is to keep going. just make sure to keep at it and not relapse. one weak moment can reset the whole clock. good luck.

if swiy can beat this, she might have avoided a long downward spiral that so many could not.

[Nagognog2]

Not 'IF' - will.

Six months down the road, SWIM will wonder what the big deal was about. Unless them dumb voices make a SWIM soften up.

KEEP ON TRUCKIN'!

[Forthesevenlakes]

Originally Posted by tweak123

well it's been 5 days and swim is still feeling like shit...but its not as bad. she still hasn't told her mother because she just doesnt know how. her boyfriend was very supportive and has been with her almost every hour of these last few days. Swim understands this completely...she was to the point where she was just disgusted with herself and it wasn't fun for her anymore. After these 5 days she has a lot more confidence than she did the first day..she thinks she can stay clean; hopefully forever. We'll see, swim is trying not to think too far ahead in the future and just take things one day at a time. it's working so far.

SWIY is lucky to have that kind of support from her boyfriend, having someone there makes a kick many times easier and SWIM would reccomend it to anyone trying to stop using a substance. Sounds like SWIY is doing quite well, and keep in mind that every day will get easier. Focus on staying healthy and feeling better, and talk to her mom about it later, when SWIY feels ready. Stick with it, and congratulations for stopping! Keep us updated as to how SWIY is feeling, and remember that things can only get better from here.

[Moonage Daydream]

Recently swim's mother forced a confession out of her when she was throwing up due to food poisoning! Her mother is not callous btw, just think that it had been bothering her for a while and seeing her daughter look pale and a bit greenish reminded her of the times when she haunted the room in comedown angst and jitters...
She had been up on speed for a few days and the first time she ate on a comedown she threw up - just great!
Swim felt bad because she was addicted to speed before, and quit for 2 and a half years, she has been secretly using, in a much more functional way than last time, for 4 years now. Swim does amphetamine not meth but similar idea really... it's hard to get meth in the UK.
Only by completely quitting was she able to reduce the amount she took, and control the situations she took it in. She was successful in giving up injecting speed at least before actually giving up the substance altogether which is at least one thing. Mind you she never developed a needle fetish, quite squeamish really and the main thing is to have amphetamine in her blood not so important how it gets there.
When swim gave up last time she had one to one counselling. NA she tried but not for her, swim is very bad at group confession thing although totally understands it works for others
she got back into speed through diet pills as she was very depressed at having gained 35 lb (as well as other things going not so great), in retrospect should have forced herself to exercise sooner. Ephedrine helped to some degree as a substitute, quite large amounts then reducing over 2 weeks or so
anyway don't know if this will help, hope it does... swim does meander a bit!

[ex-junkie]

Originally Posted by tweak123

well it's been 5 days and swim is still feeling like shit...but its not as bad. she still hasn't told her mother because she just doesnt know how. her boyfriend was very supportive and has been with her almost every hour of these last few days. Swim understands this completely...she was to the point where she was just disgusted with herself and it wasn't fun for her anymore. After these 5 days she has a lot more confidence than she did the first day..she thinks she can stay clean; hopefully forever. We'll see, swim is trying not to think too far ahead in the future and just take things one day at a time. it's working so far.

good work chicky.

swim started off taking speed in her final year of high school, didnt go to college, and ended up on heroin for most of her twenties.

addiction is very real, and swiy needs to think about what she wants to do with her youth and her life, and take the necessary steps to achieve this. taking meth will only get in the way of being successful.

try not to feel too down on swiy, and when things get tough reach out for some support. swim wouldnt bother telling their mother unless she is a supportive spirit.

anyways, massive props for beginning to turn your life around so young.