Parenting and Drugs

[Trebor]

First of, if a Mod can decide on the best location for this please feel free to move it.

I believe that people with young children, below the age of 14, should not use drugs. Any mind altering drugs. I believe this to be right so that you have a clear head to deal with the children. Also, I believe parents should be honest with their children oncce they are of an age where they will know the difference between drugs and their effects. This mean sno more "I'd love you to ttry some weed but weait until the kids are in bed." The kids in this example Swim gave me were 16 and 17. Both of which Siwm knew to have taken drugs. The parents were refusing to tell their children of their weed useage.

WHat are your opinions on this?

Reputation Comments on this post:

Excellent topic even if I disagree with your stance

[grecian]

I agree that parents should be honest with their children about the effects of drugs.

I don't agree that parents of young children should not use drugs. I think that drugs can be very benoficial to a persons general well-being, everyone needs to let off steam once in a while and recreational drug use can be a very effective way of doing this.

[Trebor]

But surely you agree that it's not a good idea to be tripping on LSD or mushrooms while your kids are in the room noext to you?

[Corksil]

I believe that there is a time and place for everything. If a young child were to walk in on their father/mother ingesting a powerful substance such as LSD, I believe it could turn out to be a disaster. The thought that someone close to you, who you have known your whole life is suddenly someone else, acting in a different way, could be extremely frightening/traumatic for a child. SWIM knows a friends father who would be around his children on LSD, and he described the experience as so incredibly beautiful that he cried. A child may not understand this, and SWIM guesses that this could lead to fear.

I think the simple answer for the question is a big -MAYBE.- I think the easiest way to find out the best way to handle this would be to talk to the child when the child is old enough to understand, and keep a close enough connection open with the child that if they chose to ingest a substance such as LSD, they felt comfortable with the parent knowing.

On some of SWIMS mushroom experiences, he felt a very strong desire to be around someone who knows him as well as someone such as a father or sister of SWIM.

[Nagognog2]

Bongo recalls - with great mirth - an evening when he was asked to go visit two teaching psychiatrists, husband & wife, at a prestigous medical school in New England (and no, Bongo was not in a straight-jacket...yet).

He was greeted, along with his fellow ape, and ushered into the fashionable home of Dr. A & B and offered a chairs. The good doctor's 13 year old twins were scampering about the house. And the doctor's invited them to go to bed - and stay there!

Bongo then produced the material the shrink's were interested in. It was 5-Meo-DMT. Dr. A & B inhaled the vile fumes from the pipe gleefully. And, predictably, fell out of their chairs - with a little help from Bongo & Co. After gasping and clawing at the face of God for 17 minutes - they asked Bongo to please give them a quantity for their inter-personal research...

So two shrinks who teach head-shrinking at a prestigious Medical School believe under 14 ain't a brite idear. But I'll bet those kids raided their parent's stash every chance they had.

[old hippie 56]

As a father of a 6 yr. old girl, a little weed goes a long way in letting steam off. But, never around the kid. After she goes to school in the morning, and after she is asleep at night.

[Nature Boy]

This topic reminds me very much of 1984, the part about children ratting out their very own parents. Perceptions on drug use amongst children can be much like that today. It's beaten into their brains in schools from the off, especially in the US. If SWIM ever has children he would hope that they never think like that.

[CrookedEye]

SWIM has told his children about every drug he has ever taken.. He doesn't think fearing and hiding the truth from children is right.. SWIM's children are very close to him, and SWIM has a lot of experience with drugs.. SWIM has shared the truth about every drug there is with his children, and they are very open about drugs when speaking to him..

It's better to tell children the truth, rather than lie to them, until they don't believe anything SWIY says.. SWIM's children show very little interest in drugs, since he has been very open.. People in SWIM's neighborhood pretty much all smoke pot, and SWIM's kids even help him harvest mushrooms and trim nuggets, as this is part of SWIM's belief and spirituality..

His children understand, and are not interested in tripping.. They have enjoyed ganja treats on occasion, but they all do exceptionally well in their classes at school.. Two of them are leading their class in grades.. SWIM's children make him very proud, and he is glad he can share the truth with them, rather than hide behind lies perpetuated by the government..

When SWIM was growing up, he was told that every drug was evil and bad, yet after experiencing many drugs, such as mushrooms, LSD, and cannabis, all purported to be bad, SWIM found out they were all very safe.. Soon SWIM tried heroin with the same skepticism, but found out it was a different ball game.. SWIM found the truth out on his own, and it was a long hard journey.. His children had to experience their father kicking dope, and more.. He vowed to always tell the truth to his children, and is extremely happy with them and their understanding of drugs..

Lying only creates distrust, so if one wants to protect their children, it's best, in SWIM's opinion, to explain the truth about drugs, rather than shield them from them, because then they will learn about drugs from other kids, who haven't a clue about the truth..

Just SWIM's two cents...

Reputation Comments on this post:

Excellent post. "Lying creates distrust." Right on.

[pankreeas]

Swim very much agrees, the age altho could even stand to be until adulthood .. 15-17 is a very suseptible age.. After that, reasoning starts to kick in a little more. This is exactly why swim is going hard now to ensure that when time comes for him to stop, he won't look back and say "oh nuts I missed that 1"

[motorhead]

I agree that parents should not get extremely messed up when watching the kids and that nobody should really take any substance until they are of age. However when it comes to weed I think parents should be open as possible.

I believe weed should be legal and removing the stigma around it is important. I mean, parents drink around their kids do they not? Like I said, people shouldnt give weed to their kids, but they shouldnt act like it is wrong by hiding their own use or telling them that it is bad and they should never use it. Tell them that it is ok to use once they are of age-just like booze.

I think the big thing is talking to your kids about addiction, their choice of lifestyles, and the dangers of drug abuse. If you have a good relationship with your kid then hopefully you can have a good talk about all the stuff they hear and see at school or whatever, then hope they make the right choices.

I think the "My way or the highway" approach to parenting usually ends up in rebellion, mistrust, and a lot of headaches.

[Corksil]

CrookedEye, I wonder what the remote possibility is that I know you? Heh heh, you sound very much like the father of two of my good friends, and their older brother.

As a person who recently went through the D.A.R.E. Programs that are practically mandatory in schools, I can attest to the fact that what they beat into the kids heads is not pretty. Children come out of a program like that confused, scared, and with two thoughts pounding in their head -- Drugs are bad, and JUST SAY NO. They teach you how to say it, the tell you a little bit about all the bad things drugs do to people, they bring in people to give their sob-stories, and continiuously drive home the point that drugs are horrible things.

After going through a program like that, I recall returning home after school, and when my father drank a beer with dinner, I can recall a distinct feeling of fear that he would turn into another person, and do evil things. I do not believe the people who design programs like D.A.R.E. understand how young and impressionable children in grade-school are. Or maybe they do and fear is their main objective?

[pankreeas]

Originally Posted by Corksil

Or maybe they do and fear is their main objective?

Pretty much. How do you keep a society under your rule? with fear.. it's the only way. fear of death, fear of life, fear of everything. If you don't take this, you might die, however if you take it you may die too.. They make the medicationsa before there is even need for them... it's all about fear and keeping the public in darkness.. like im saying anything new..

[MrG]

As a parent SWIM does not condone the taking of certain drugs that could incapacitate them or prevent them from behaving as normally (read sensibly) as possible around their kids should their kids need attention.

As for people who believe that parents of very young children should not do drugs SWIM believes that it is always going to be down to the individuals ability to use any substance reasonably. e.g. He has heard some absolute horror stories of potentially fatal incidents from some parents who recount being so drunk as to have put their small babies lives at risk. These stories are often told a being "humorous tales" but are, in fact, nothing more than irresponsible behaviour that, luckily, they got away with.

Unfortunately society smiles at these antics and pats them on the back and says "there there, you were just tired and needed to unwind, of course you got so drunk that you nearly dropped the baby on its head but that's ok, no harm done".

If SWIM were to be busted having a joint or a little bit of a party of an evening whilst his kids were asleep I'm sure he would be crucified irrespective of the fact that he always ensures that he can straighten his head out and deal with any problem should he need to.

[Bassic]

Just use a little common sense about which drugs you can use while around children if theres an emergency and which you cannot. My dad let me drink wine/beer from the age of 8ish but only occasionally. The occasional cannabis cookie would be fine too. It's all common sense really. Simple.

[Trebor]

All make excellent points. In particular CrookedEye.

Swim has vowed that if he ever has kids that he'll quit dope until they are of an age where Swim can trust them to be able to look after themselves. Then, when they are of say, 14-15 years old, he'll let them smoke a joint. The same age as Siwm was. All thwe while educating them as they progress.

[Riconoen {UGC}]

I'd have to agree with trebor, swim would do the same with his kids when he has some.

[Pinkavvy]

Swip has posted a few posts on this forum that portray his feelings on drugs use around children.


http://www.drugs-forum.com/forum/sho...637#post220637 says -

Originally Posted by Pinkavvy

Marijuana is a spiritual and religious sacrement for swips family. Swip and his family use marijuana as a spiritual praising of life, and are always consuming marijuana. There is a silver tray that sits on an alter and is filled with marijuana each morning for all to partake. This marijuana is smoked all day. At any givin time there is a joint or a bowl going around or siting waiting for you to hit it. All 3 meals in swips house are prepared using marijuana butter and/or oil. Despite the "average" stoner stereotype, swips family is very productive. Running a family business and starting a second family business (a counter-culture co-op storefront that sells patchwork clothing, organic living items, books, glass art, etc.) swips family reads together each day and have discussions on all topics, from current events and history to business to spirituality and philosphy and more. Swips family meditates together and excersizes together while under the influence. Marijuana is the cornerstone of thier peaceful and spiritual lifestyle as a family and for each individual.
// Yes, swips son who is a teenager also partakes with the family. Since taking him off of the poisoning amphetamines such as ritilin and adderal (that are very armful for children going through purberty) and switched him to marijuana his behavior in school has completely turned around and his grades are straight A's and he has opened up and stays very close to his family and friends, which is hard to get from most teenagers.

http://www.drugs-forum.com/forum/sho...191#post135191 says-

Originally Posted by Pinkavvy

Swim and his girl have two kids. they are very involved in a 'hippy' lifestyle always doing crafts and preparing for the next festival, and of course promoting drug safety awareness and decrim of marijuana. Swim has a library or pshychodelic books to read on the shelfs and are very open. The oldest, their daughter, has friends that smoke weed and know swim and his girl smoke weed but hasn't any interest in it herself, and we respect her wishes by not doing it in the same room as her. Though she will enter the room knowing it's going on and talk sometimes, we never offer her any at all, but make sure she understands the facts of it and the medical aspects of it. The younger teenager, a son, is a much more contriversial subject. He was enslaved to Ritilin and Adderal due to ADHD and the public school system pushing their drugs on him, which was casuing him more troubles at school and with his health. Swim and his girl finally decided to take him off the sitmulants the teachers and docters were pushing on him and allowed him (at the young age of 12) start to vaporize cannibas and eat cannibas foods. Since then, about two years ago, there has been drastic improvement in his grades and the way he behaves at school, home, festivals, and general socializing. The school is not aware of his use, and think it's their stimulants and give him much praise since then... when before he was being suspended weekly and getting bad grades on their stimulants. He understands the marijuana is a medical and spiritual thing for him and his parents, He also understands the social, physical, and mental drawbacks of harder drugs... from stories he's heard from family and friends from past use, as well as reading about how the effect the body. He understands the dangers and benefits and does more reading and studying about drugs then the average erowid reader. He looks forward to his time in life, when he's an adult and ready, to explore pshychodelics and other things. He has no interest in abusing stimulants or opiates, though understands the fun and benefits of their occasional use and acknowledges that as a pshychonaut and 'hippy' he will experiment with these things in moderation and inteligently as an adult.

[Flimmar]

SWIM believes, that the only way to work around this issue, is to do like SWICrookedEye. Being open, honest and telling SWIY children about drugs, and what they do, that requires a certain type of family, which SWIM can see that he has.

Since SWIY has been so honest, there's nothing exciting about doing the drugs, since "dad is doing them" they're simply not as thrilling?

Anyway, SWIM is glad to hear, that SWIY children do well in school, and so on.