My Summer Slamming Meth....

[methMADMAN]

So many of y'all may have met me under another screen name I used to use here when I was researching recipes for making speed of various sorts. I didn't really research it for much more reason than to know, but I did get a good steady connection to some good "Ice" methamphetamine. I was able even to work for most of my dope so it didnt cost me money. I started out "suckin the glass dick" or smoking my shit, effective but in hindsight pathetic. My friend of many years, an old school "Slammer" insisted one day I hit the needle and reluctantly I did. This girl uses lightly compared to hardcore folks like me and while it was cool I wasn't that impressed. I continued mostly to smoke. Then I met a chick I kinda had the hots for and she too was a slammer and soon I was off and running and getting good powerful hits that rocked my world. Soon I had no use for smoking except as a social habit. Long story short, this girl and I did a solid month long run with virtually no sleep. It was a HELLA intensely hellish comedown let me tell you. And at the end of the run I was psychotic and a raving lunatic, barely holding it together and having something of a mental collapse.

I laid off ofr a while but soon found myself slamming meth on weekends again. All summer long I wore long sleeve flannels to hide my track marks. I was ok a while but I began to decline into serious abuse again. I was slamming between 1/2 and 1 gram of the purest "Ice" I could get. My best hit was probably a near death experience as it was like I had run a marathon instantly as the taste of the huge gram+ load hit my taste buds. I think that night I hit another gram a few hours later and whacked off to internet porn for like 12 hours until my dick had blisters......How productive huh?

In the end the meth rage set in. I became and angry violent motherfucker, believe that! I didn't hurt anyone much fortunately but I was so close so many times and even after I had come down and been clean a while the anger and violence continued. I beat up my car and was suicidal. I have only the grace of god and the love of my family and dearest friends to thank for my survival of this ordeal. In the end I punched a woman I love (after she kicked me in the face) but I just don't do that kind of thing, yet I did. A day later I was slamming tar heroin to get off meth and I got cotton fever and was so sick and weak the woman I did the meth with's daughter and a 73 year old man beat me up (when I am well I could have taken them both one handed and I shit you not). Long story short in one short summer meth cut me down to size.

In the end we all have our own paths in life, and I can't say that anyone should not do meth, it's your choice and I fully believe in the peoples right to do drugs and I am fully pro legalization. I do believe however that meth will in a long time or short take down 95% of anyone who fools with it too much. Bottom line is I wanted to briefly share one man's personal experience that others might make of it what you will. I hope it will help someone someday at very least. I am now trying to be clean and sober in those 12 step programs we've all heard of.....Good luck and god bless to all who dabble with the meth monster!

Reputation Comments on this post:

	You forgot to swim.
	self incrimination

[~lostgurl~]

methMADMAN, Before proceeding further SWIY REALLY needs to use SWIM (Someone Who Isn't Me). Self incrimination is NOT allowed, and the use of SWIM is NON NEGOTIABLE. Not abiding by the rules here can and WILL get SWIY banned. Please read the forum rules here:
http://www.drugs-forum.com/forum/misc.php?do=cfrules

[methMADMAN]

In my state consumption and intoxication from meth are not crimes, only possession is, I never admitted I commited any crime.....

[Jatelka]

^^^ Nonetheless, the use of SWIM (or similar) is non-negotiable. This is a world wide community and what is legal/ not where SWIY is may be very different to elsewhere.

No arguments: SWIM with the rest of us or go elsewhere!

[methMADMAN]

Well freakin 7 goddamn long months later SWIM is twitching and itching and brain damaged, arthritic, and in pain daily due to meth abuse....But still clean and FREE!!!! AA and NA do wonders.....the elevator to clean and sober time are broke take the steps!

[cyndi]

Originally Posted by methMADMAN

Well freakin 7 goddamn long months later SWIM is twitching and itching and brain damaged, arthritic, and in pain daily due to meth abuse....But still clean and FREE!!!! AA and NA do wonders.....the elevator to clean and sober time are broke take the steps!

Swim here can really relate to your story. Meth is an insanity isn't it? Starts out just great till everything and everyone around you are hurting because of swim's little nasty habit. Boy the comedown, swiy nailed it. Swim would throw crap, become very ugly verbally to others, and other things she won't mention. Very very angry, just a rage one can't describe unless one has been there. Suicidal oh you bet. This is not a fun recreational drug that swiys make it out to be. They will learn. Unfortunately the hard way probably. Swim was doing some research on this as after 14 fucking years, swim decided a little hit wouldn't hurt, ok tweaked out for the next 3 months, oh yeah bad decision. Cravings are back but after a month of abstaining it is getting better. Some really crazy dreams, but at least swim isn't hating on everyone and everything any more. Arthritis oh yeah, it is worse, swim can barely move today. Was in agony last night. Anyway she was reading and the article said 20% of people in aa/na actually make it, encouraging right? 40% maybe if they go long term and keep to the meetings. Swim personally can't do the steps and is still looking into what helps. Also in that same article it said people with meth problems have a better chance to rid themselves of the disease than terminal cancer patients. Swim thought oh that is just freaking great. This was in Newsweek magazine, Swim forgot the month. Anyway keep fighting the good fight, meth is an evil drug. Swim is battling the beast with you.

[andibabi]

wow, what a story... sounds very familiar. swim has faught the needle demon for 9 years. slamming a thick-70 center of some really good shiznit, says it all really. makes swims stomach sick just thinkin' about it. swim never went to rehab, but she did go to a couple NA meetings w/ a friend. mostly, she did it all by herself. guess that's why she fell backwards more than a few times. good luck staying clean .... keep up the good willpower.

"put the meth down, and step slowly away from your brain."

[old hippie 56]

Good luck, the pain will go away in time.