Journal - Anxiety - methamphetamine withdrawal

[~lostgurl~]

SWIM feels like giving up on giving up. 3 days is all it has been, 3 days with no methamphetamine, the anxiety is all swim can feel, its not about craving anymore, its not about wanting to get high or even about wanting to feel happy, its about feeling comfortable in her own skin.

She should have planned this better. She should have prepared something to calm her down. All she has is her prescription Zopiclone, 15mg at night, but SWIM is taking at least 22.5mg at night and at least 7.5mg during the day, she thinks she should have got another script for Klonapin, but it took her a long time to come off the benzo, so she doesn't want to be repeating that cycle. And she has been drinking e2 for its miniscule dose of Taurine (213mg) which helps a bit SWIM thinks but can see why recommended dose is so much higher, and she is not too hot on the caffeine combo either, that cannot be helping.

Should SWIM give up and try again when she is better prepared? If she keeps on keeping on or whatever the saying is, she is going to have some really nasty nights when her prescription runs out prematurely, cause right now thats about all shes got, and she is trying to be controlled, but all she is doing is staring at the clock and waiting for a time she thinks is ok to call bedtime so she can take 3 of the pills and sleep for a bit.