Boyfriend with heroin addiction and multiple relapses- what can I do?

[lost]

My boyfriend is a heroin addict. I have accepted that and am trying to support him as much as I can however, I am starting to lose faith.He has tried to kick it on several occasions. He went to rehab, tried cold turkey, and even took valium for a few days and made it through 4 days of hellish withdraw. As soon as he began to feel well again he used again and turned into a monster until he got some. I know it is up to him to get clean. I know he is the only one who can do it and he has to do it for himself. He tells me night after night he is never going to do it again because he sees how much he hurts me and us and that he doesn't want to be a prisoner to the drug. He wants to get married and live happily ever after. Does anyone have any suggestions for me? I am at rock bottom and I don't know if I can take anymore.

I do not want to give you much hope as there usually is not much hope, if youre realistic. There is one remedy that probably will work, but it may be lethal. It is Iboga or eboga, an African Shrub. Strong psychedelic and strong anti-addictive. XXXXXXXX

[hollywood]

I used herion for many years and it's hard to beat. The withdrawls are so painfull. I'm sure he wants to quit but it's so hard. Be carful of methadone, it's more addictive than herion. Get him in a good rehab then get him a shrink that deals with additcs. Addiction recovery or something like that, that is if he really wants to quit. Good luck.............................................. ..................

[lost]

Thank you for all of your responses. My friend is currently quitting cold turkey for the second time. He uses valium, sleeping pills, and ibuprofin to get through the pain. He says it is the worst thing in the world. After not doing heroin for 4 or 5 days he says his body no longer craves the drug at all. He says it's his mind that makes him want to do it. He feels so bad about all of the pain and suffering he has caused his family and friends that he goes straight back to getting high to relieve his guilt. He can be crying about how moch he hates his life and heroin and how much it is ruining everything. He will swear this is the end this time and then half an hour later be looking for some. Is this ongoing circle typical? Will it ever end?The informative web sites only tell you so much, I want to hear from people who have been there. Thanks everyone!

[hollywood]

Lost. Yes. This is clasic behavor. I used for over 20 years. It took me 13 times in rehab and several years in prison to finially stop. I even used in the joint. But every day of those 20 years I wanted to stop. I went through what he is many times"alot because I couldn't find any dope", and one day I said No More! That was the best thing I ever did. He has to really want to quit, not just say it. He can say he is useing for any reason, a million. The test will be when the demons come. If he can beat them he will be OK. Best of luck. Keep me posted. You can send me a PM and we can talk more...................

[beth]

lost


i feel exactly the same as u my brother is just like your boyfriend wanting to give up but u know he is back on it again


for the second time now he is relapsing and it is hell for ther whole family.

[GenFu]

I've heard very good things about Ibogaine treatment for addicts. It isn't easily available or cheap (I believe their are off-shore clinics due to legality). There are some risks, but it is surely worth consideration. There have been reports of the Ibogaine experience (which is hallucinegenic) removing both the physical craving, but more significantly the mental also. erowid.org will have more info

[lost]

I want to thank everyone for all of their advice. The update is that he has quit sooooooooo many times and then relapsed. One time he even stopped for over a month. He is at a breaking point right now. He says he is so tired of being a slave to heroin. He hates it. He says that he doesn't even enjoy it anymore and only does enough so that he can function at work and not feel sick. He just wants to be free. I actually believe this time that he has had enough of this lifestyle and all of the shit that goes with it (losing friends, no money, car accident, court, etc...) Unfortuantly he can't get off of work for a few days to go through the withdraw process. He tries but then has to give in because of the sickness he feels. Any tips on how to detox and still function during a 6 day work week? Is there any way to?

[Woodman]

Lost,



Some employers offer recovery pograms via medical benafits. Since your b/f is apparently f/t (full time) he may qualify.



I recommend you examine his employment data regarding medical benefits.



If he IS covered, then he's going to have to make an unbreakable commitment to quit as he will likely be subject to regular testing.



I wish I had better news. It has been nine months since your original post. Your loyalty is commendable, but if all continues as it has then sooner or later you'll have to leave him for your own good.



I know it's a lot to say not knowing the contingencies of YOUR particular situation (joint property, accounts, kids, etc.), but you WILL eventually have to acknowledge that this is a problem that YOU have no control over, and you will need to take defensive action.



Sorry if this sounds harsh. Maybe I don't have the brain right now to make it sound the way I mean it.

[lost]

Thanks Woodman. Your response wasn't too harsh. I appreciate your advice.


He is going to take a few days off this weekend and go through with the process on his own. Hopefully all will go well!!!<img border="0" src= "smileys/smiley1.gif">

[cartonb]

Suboxone, if this drug is used correctly you can get swiy's boyfriend off heroin. You should look up the nearest doctor on www.suboxone.com
You should try to make sure that he quickly figures out a dose that is good for him, probably about 1 8mg pill a day, then have the amount cut down a 1/4th of a pill a day until he is on about 1/4 an 8 mg subo a day then he can taper off that very slowly. Swim has been on suboxone for about 7 months and that was my mistake. The doctor told me to plan on staying on the drug for 6 months to a year but from what iv read people with a short stay on suboxone are much more successful. Everyone that has been on it as long as I have say that it is nearly impossible to get off. But this is a good option you should definetly consider because it blocks the effects so using is pointless and makes you feel great. done right this can cure heroin addiction.

[dyingtomorrow]

Sometimes heroin addicts say they want to get off for the sake of their family and friends, but inside have no intention of doing it, for the simple fact that for many people even though it has destroyed their life, it is the only way for them to cope with the present (especially after ruining so much) or think of a future for themselves.

Does your BF have a history of depression? The only possibility might be going to a shrink (many can be found with a double specialization in addiction and depression), and get him on something else to make him feel normal first before trying to get/stay off heroin.

Sorry to hear your dilemma. Please let us know how it continues to go.

[ScorpioSunshine]

Swim isn't sure if the OP will answer since this thread is four years old.

Very nice of you two to step in, though.

[dyingtomorrow]

Hmm, never check that and didn't even notice. Maybe someone will search for it in the future and be glad they found some responses. I have found so many old threads on google searches before I came here that I wanted the answer to sooo bad but were long dead.

[accountphil]

I used heroin for 10 years. Through that time I never wanted to stop. I thought I would always feel this way and had accepted it, I never lied to family about it just that I couldn't stop because the heroin was so much better than the depression. Then one day about a year ago the depression stopped and I no longer wanted to use heroin. After I wanted to stop it was so easy. However previously when I wanted to stop, only for lack of money it was impossible. If he really wants to stop it is easy, if he doesn't then you have to decide whether you want to live with an addict or not while you wait until he changes his mind, it may never come.