Is it worth it?

[college]

drugs can ruin a good relationship, if that worth it?Edited by: college

[Solidly-here]

If I had wings, I could fly.


Having a Love relationship opens up some of the Deepest feelings in my soul. In pre-Adult days it can be even More confusing, and frequently brings up childhood issues of frustrated love in Family relationships (and the unfairness of treatment). Then the girlfriend (sometimes) BECOMES the object of that confusion.


This reminds me of a story I heard. The Husband comes home, frustrated about work that day. He yells at his Wife. She gets angry, and spanks her Son. He gets angry and kicks the Cat.


The Son may like that Cat, but he is acting out his feelings of anger with the ONLY available "person"; he can't hit his Dad (for starting it). He can't hit his Mom (who actually hit him). But the Cat IS available.


The problem with deep feelings (for people of ALL ages) is that they can bounce around between a kind, warm love ... and a frustrated, angry state. I think it comes from being so helpless (I am in love), and feeling that the other one MAY use this relationship to control me in ways I don't want (she will hurt me some day ... so maybe I should punish her now for it).


Anyway, Life is a long time. Plenty of time to make a Million mistakes (I'm up to 700,000 already). Growth is to have those Same feelings in your next relationship, But this time you don't ACT them out the same Way. Progress, not perfection.

[MrJim]

Never does a woman look so beautiful as when she turns her head and walks out the door. Hindsight will glorify, not clarify.

[Nature Boy]

You should never allow a woman to make you vulnerable. You have to put yourself in a position where you can put the foot down. It was an extremely tough break that she cheated on you man. It was as though she thought it was fair for her to cheat with another guy while you were "cheating" on drugs. I tend not to discuss drugs with girls I go out with unless they're into them too (which is not many). Words like XTC, acid etc. are practically designed to freak 'em out half the time. It may be a bit of a generalisation, but ignorance is what caused your break-up.

[pabel_giboon]

SWIM had came in and out of drugs for 15 years, some times pushed out by a girl. SWIM has also been married 2 and planning to marry again next year with the girl SWIM lives with now. I velive love is much more mind-oppening and fun (at least when everithing works out fine) than any drug. As a matter of fact love dopes us, less than X or C, but it does. SO IF YOU´D GIVE UP WHATEVER JUST TO BE WITH HER DO IT, DON´T DOUBT FOR EVEN A SECOND.
In the best of the cases you´d ve inlove forever and won´t miss drugs a bit, otherwise maybe in a year or so you´d be´cheating´ her on drugs, maybe she gets interested on it an you can share it (I would´t count on that) and maybe she turns out being a bitch. So what? life goes on, don´t be afraid of quitting drugs for a while or forever. Do you have an addiction problem? Does not look like. Take advantage of your position and do whatever peases you, in this case, GO FOR HER.


---don´t take me too serious---

[college]

Your all right, its nothing life threatening, just sucks big time. I always carry guilt for the drugs I have done, which really isnt all that much, but I enjoyed it all immensly, and am glad I had the oppurtunity to do so I just wish that she would have understood that then. I wanted to share it all with her, so I let her know the "other" side of me. Guess I learned a lesson. I have a personal saying about drugs, it goes.... no matter how far up you go, you must equally go that far down. The "down" could be anything, but there is a catch to all we do. The down could be getting busted, losing direction in life, becoming a scum bag, or in a lesser scenario lose the one you love. I dont know why its a hot topic all of a sudden. Just miss her a lot.

[cactus]

I could never stand to even consider talking to a woman that had the nerve to cheat on me. It sounds to me thatas much as you guys loved each other there was something wrong in the communication department.


My girl hates psychedelics, but she would never consider stopping me from doing them (providing my use is sensible).They are part of my life, part of who i am andi feel that if someone is going to inhibit your life and growth then they arent the one for you. if its your quest to explore then so be it, along your journey you will find someone that shares your ideals, or least understands them.


Forget her mate, move on and be thankful for the experience/lessons she gave you. It is obviously something you had to learn.

[oldman]

yeah college cactus is right, chalk that experience up to lesson learned as I always say. If she cheated she was planning to get out. Your young (guessing) get over it and move on. You can't wonder if I had done this or acted like that things would be different and they probably would with you being miserable cause you gave up a freedom for a hot piece of ass. You're gonna crash and burn some more but it does get easier. I used to think like nature up there and keep that stuff a secret. My wife found out I was using coaine regularly 1 week before our wedding. we both labored the first several years but she becameready to lose the guilt as you say about drug usagemore and the past 5-6 years it is better than anything, so if you want to be a explorer, be true to yourself and find some chick thatthat's down with that. You're gonna have more fun anyway and you won't have to lie to her or yourself.


and I guess that's why they call it the blues!