Rethinking my medication

[Nahbus]

So about a year ago I was diagnosed as having bipolar disorder. I don't
get bad depression, mainly just very intense manic episodes. So the
doctors put me on Lithium, Zoloft and Seroquel. I tapered myself off
Zoloft because I felt it was shit.

Anyway, lately I don't feel it is doing much, and maybe even rethinking
my whole diagnosis. I know this is common for people to try and stop
taking their meds because they feel better, but I feel as though the
pills aren't doing what they need to be doing.

I've been feeling great lately, but I've been very anxious around other
people, and I've been chain smoking non-stop as well. Also very fidgity.

The doctors will just tell me to stay on them because I feel fine, but how will I ever know if I can handle my brain on my own?

I thought I had ADD or ADHD when I was talking to my doctor but we
never really went into it. Lately these symptoms seem worse. I always
kind of want some sort of stimulation, too. I've been drinking a hell
of a lot of coffee with the hell of a lot of cigs.

Not even sure of what to do because I don't even have a doctor to go to
right now, my bitch doctor won't see me anymore because I missed 2
appointments, when she cancelled 3.

Anyway, just kind of venting. Lithium isn't that good for you and I
want to stop taking it. What do you guys think? Anyone have a similar
experience?



PS the Lithium kinfa of muffles other recreational drugs, which I do not like.