A rehab facility catering for couples?

[beena]

SWIM thinks there is an argument to be had in favour of rehab facilities catering for couples. At present there aren't any that SWIM knows of in this country (Britain) and generally drug-counsellers don't like couples on drugs staying together and many refuse to treat ones who do.
SWIM feels so strongly about this that she has outlined the reasons why she thinks there is currently a gap in the rehab market below. She would appreciate it if people took the time to read this thread and then post comments below.
SWIM would like to know if others agree with what she is saying and also if there are any people out there in a similar situation to SWIM: people in long-term relationships, where both partners have a drug problem, who simply aren't catered for at this time. They are either told to split up and go to rehabs/seek treatment individually or shut up and get on with it. In other words they are refused treatment.
Also SWIM would like to know if anybody knows of any facilities or rehab treatment centres where couples are catered for. SWIM expects to find there are very few, if any, in existence.
In SWIM's case she and her partner have been together 9 years - this is no schoolground crush. SWIMs partner has been to rehab a few times but SWIM never has, although she has been to look at rehab facilities with her boyfriend so as he can make a decision on which one to go to and she has been to visit him when he's been a resident at rehabs.
All the rehabs SWIM knows of in this country have a policy where they only take single people (not couples), so SWIM couldn't go to rehab with her boyfriend even if she wanted too. This is despite the fact that all drugs-counsellors will tell you that it is hard for one person to get clean and nearly impossible for two people who are in a relationship and both using to get clean and stay clean, unless they both really want it and are both getting help.
In the last rehab SWIMs boyfriend was in they actively tried to split them up because they felt so strongly that they couldn't get clean together.
Even though he said this wasn't an option they repeatedly brought it up in groups and attacked his position to try and make him change his mind.
SWIM understands why they did what they did but it makes her so angry that there is this attitude amongst drug-workers and rehabs.
Another friend of SWIM's was in a rehab for alcohol addiction and met someone in there. They started to see each-other clandestinely but were found out. When they were discovered they were told they either had to split up or get out. They lied and said they would stop seeing each-other but really carried on. The staff were suspicious though and they were asked to leave.
This makes me so angry - ok, so the situation isn't ideal but surely its better that they continue to get help together rather than being thrown out and receive no help. The staff at the rehab must know in that situation that the person or people involved are unlikely to be able to continue their soberdom for long without help and support.
SWIM can see the argument too that it is unfair on other residents for their to be a couple amongst them who already know each-other and have a close bond, but surely there is room for a rehab to be set up that is solely for couples? This way no-one would be at an advantage.
SWIM thinks there is a real gap in the market for a couples rehab. Couples who go there would of course be made aware that it is going to be extremely difficult to stay clean together: be made aware of all the facts and the statistics. But if they still want to remain a couple after a discussion with staff of this nature then they should be admitted together. This way they could attend support groups together where they could examine their drug-use together and learn why they do what they do, identify triggers and all the usual stuff that is done at rehabs. They could also have one-to-one counselling though to address their individual issues. Because it is a couples rehab there could be classes/groups scheduled that are slightly different from the usual ones you get at rehab. They could have discussions targeted to the fact that there is two of them. Looking, for example, at what to do if one of you proves weaker than the other. Ways to support each-other and how to deal with one of the couple failing to remain clean.
The important thing to is that at least they would both be there (at a rehab) at the same time. The worst thing is if one person is staying at a rehab and getting clean whilst the other is at home and continuing to use drugs. Six months spent at a rehab together would be six months that they've both spent off drugs. Another argument in favour of a couple going to rehab together is that they would be learning to live with each-other whilst not being on drugs. Sounds silly but if two people have been taking drugs together for a long time they will have forgotten how to have a relationship that doesn't revolve around taking or getting drugs.
They could relearn being together in a safe environment with other couples going through the same or similar experiences.
SWIM thinks that although it may not be ideal for drug-addicts to stay together many do. Rehabs need to start being realistic about this and stop ostricizing couples and cutting them off from treatment.
At least give couples a chance to receive the same care together that is currently available only to single people.

Reputation Comments on this post:

good idea