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Opiate addiction Support for coping with Opiate addiction and Opiate addiction treatment.

 
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  #1  
Old 17-02-2013, 17:36
johnnyg12376 johnnyg12376 is offline
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17 days off high doses of oxycodone and heroin

Im 17 days clean from high doses of oxycodone around 300mg a day and herion 1/2g-1g a day and most of my withdrawls are gone. I still am only sleeping 3-4hrs a night and waking from them 3-4hr soaking wet, I still feel very weak and lathargic and my mind hahahah well lets say Im in a deep deep hole I truly hit rock bottom before getting clean, I lost everything, home,car,licnses,job...but I guess I saved my life. I did alot of shady stuff to some very good people and I cant stop running it over and over in my head and also cant stop thinking on how fu$#d my life is right now. I truly have to start over and Im not sure how. I need a job but Ive always worked in the construction feild and dont feel strong enough to work like that...I also changed states from Florida to New York and man its cold out, my body definatly dosent like that. I feel so lost and could use some help or sugestions on how to start peicing my life back together.
  #2  
Old 17-02-2013, 18:25
JustKeepSwimmin JustKeepSwimmin is offline
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Re: 17 days off high doses of oxycodone and heroin

First of all, let me tell you that you are doing great!!! 17 days? Wow! Not many people can do what you have done so give yourself SOME credit.

As for your home, car, license, job, etc., those all mean nothing. Coincidentally I just lost all of those myself and I am completely clean and I don't believe I deserved any of it. But those are the cards that were dealt to us. I don't hold it above my head and beat myself up for it. It's life. Take things one day at a time. Don't go too fast, trying to get a job, new house, etc., because you are only going to overwhelm yourself to the point of replapse. Just take it easy for now and when you start to feel better, THEN start getting your life back on track. You may have screwed over some good people who didn't deserve it, but if they are truly good people like you said, then an apology is never overdue. You can do all of that when you feel better. Your mind and body are much more important than any of these external possesions.

You have come this far and with the doseages that you listed above, I have a ton of respect for you for making it this long. If you have the will-power to go this long, then you have the power to do anything that you put your mind to once you are fully recovered. But please just take it easy for now and quit beating yourself up. You're doing great!
  #3  
Old 17-02-2013, 18:42
CrispCold CrispCold is offline
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Re: 17 days off high doses of oxycodone and heroin

I agree with everything JKS just said. Be VERY proud of 17 days, think of the present and work on taking small steps to rebuilding the tangible things in your life. I'm sure those good people will be able to forgive when they see the demon no longer controlling your life.

Start with getting yourself back, then work on the rest. One moment/day at a time...with long term goals to help motivate you.
  #4  
Old 17-02-2013, 18:46
johnnyg12376 johnnyg12376 is offline
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Re: 17 days off high doses of oxycodone and heroin

Yeah was a rough 3yrs.....was 6yrs clean from crack cocaine and booze when I was in a car accident....the Dr.s in Fla are no joke when it comes to handing out pain meds...only took two months to work up to 180 roxie 30s and 90 oxycontin 60s....and it only took 3months for the addict in me to come out and my monthlys only lasting 10-12 days...so the rest of the month it was herion....pills off the street are to expencive... now 3yrs later im camping out in my 82yr old grandmothers basement....man these opiates make what I went threw comming off crack and booze seem like a day at the beach....Ive never been so beat up physically and emotionally.....11 yrs of drinking like a fish and smoking crack but I always maintained my job..home..all the life things...opiates took it all in 3 short yrs.....
  #5  
Old 17-02-2013, 19:21
JustKeepSwimmin JustKeepSwimmin is offline
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Re: 17 days off high doses of oxycodone and heroin

It is an all too familiar story. But just remember, life isn't over yet. You still have plenty of time to get back what you lost PLUS more. Life is like a never ending boxing match. Everyone gets sucker punched at some point in life, no matter who you are or what the circumstances are. You just have to get back up and just stay on your feet until the bell rings. Once the bell rings (when withdrawls are over), you will be beat up and bruised but you will be motivated like no other and be energized at the same time. Just hang in there until the bell rings man. Then the next round will be here and the playing field will be level so you can knock the shit out of you opponent (addiction). The bell always rings, you just have to be patient.
  #6  
Old 17-02-2013, 20:09
Thirst4knowledge Thirst4knowledge is offline
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Re: 17 days off high doses of oxycodone and heroin

Respect to you from me too johnyg Be really proud of yourself!

One thing about being at rock bottom is that there is only one way to go - upwards. You started by saving your own life. Now you have reached seventeen days clean. You are already climbing out of that pit and coming into the light.

Great advice from other posters here about taking it easy and letting yourself recover properly before you become too ambitious. How to piece the jigsaw of life back together again? Jigsaws are one big picture cut into little bits that lock together - so you take your new clean life one piece at a time too. Gradually it will all fit to make the final big picture.

Same with those torturous thoughts- you can make good later...or at least try ,because not everyone may understand. You can't undo what has been done but a sincere apology will make you feel better anyway. That Grandmother of yours sounds golden- a treasure- and this whole experience will have contributed to a wisdom that can only be discovered the hard way.

Well done.

T4K
  #7  
Old 24-02-2013, 14:32
UnderTheRadar123 UnderTheRadar123 is offline
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Re: 17 days off high doses of oxycodone and heroin

Hang in there buddy... It gets better with time. I know right now it's hard to see past today but eventually there will come a day that you don't even think about it. Getting out of the house made me feel better. Like you, I had lost everything... Including my mind... But I can honestly say that with time, I'm happy again.... Your not gonna find to many reasons to smile while lying in your own sorrow... Congrats on making it this far... The harder part (detox) is over... Now you mind, body , and soul needs time to heal.. Let nature take its coarse.. Depression is a symptom of PAWS.. It passes.. I chose NOT to combat it with other meds.. I just reminded myself constantly that my mind was just working overtime to heal itself.. Much love.. And hang in there... You should be proud!

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Good advice and background story.
  #8  
Old 24-02-2013, 15:45
Robert Johnson Robert Johnson is offline
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Re: 17 days off high doses of oxycodone and heroin

well done man, keep fucking goin because now its time for you tot ake whats yours in this world! like the boys above said dont go to quick but your on the final stretch and one thing that i can suggest that helps so much with getting threw withdrawel is a beautiful partner to love! having someone to love is like a high in itself and especially if she wants to fuck twice a day then you probably wont feel the withdrawels at all your body will be releasing so many natural happy endorphins! best of luck bro keep it up!

save tibet, bomb china

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I wouldn't have put it so bluntly, but you are very right about Love.

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