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SWIMs Anxiety/Benzos/And Many Questions
SWIM just doesnt really know where to ask so here it goes. SWIM has had anxiety since he was little, pretty bad. SWIM gets panic attacks and hates going out. SWIM only feels comfortable going out when he uses drugs. SWIM has been doing drugs since he was 12 Vicodin, At 14 Ecstasy and Dank. And so On. SWIM is not addicted to any drugs now and has his cannabis card also for his anxiety and his love for her. SWIM does ecsatsy maybe once every 3 months, Oxycontin 1-5 times in 3 months, Cocaine Rarely, Dxm Rarely, 2-ci Sometimes. Anyways SWIM feels like he has a grip on his drug use. SWIM has smoked over 10 packs of cigs but never got addicted? Done oxycontin for over 3 years and can do cold turkey like that. SWIM doesnt understand that. MAIOs have never worked for SWIM and SWIM refused to take them. SWIM was prescribed Fluexotine(prozak) and Wellbutrin.
SWIM now has an appointment with an internal medicine doctor On Tuesday and really wants his anxiety to go away. SWIM will find out he has to do something and then dwells on it all day cuz he hates going out. Unless he is high or on something. SWIM is not going to ask for Benzos, but in the past SWIMS doctors strongly urged his mother to let him get Xanax(alozopram?)
But his mother would always say no cuz she knew his use of drugs. Now SWIM is 18, supports himself, lives alone, and is on a very good medical plan because of the work he does. SWIM has been recently a lot more convulsing almost. Its hard to explain, SWIM wont even be anxious or anything, but swims hands or leg or arms will lock up and SWIM starts to get sweaty and really scared. SWIM feels like he cant breathe and always almost calls his family, friends or 911. He never has though. SWIM almost feels like its a heart attack or seziure at first. SWIM has been getting these 2 times a week. SWIM used to get them only about a couple times a month.
SWIM has been stand offish to all of his friends and just feels like he doesnt care. In the past 2 weeks SWIM has told 2 people to get out of his place cuz they were annoying him. SWIM is usually not like this. SWIM finds himself not wanting to leave the house. Only for work. SWIM rather jsut have people come here and chill. SWIM isnt paranoid at all. He just gets really nervous when he goes out. SWIM isn't worried how he looks or anything, its just going out weirds SWIM out a lot. SWIM is really confused and wonders if his abuse of MDMA for many years have affected him. SWIM really wants a benzo that will work, but is not sure what would be best for him. SWIM has done Xanax before but at night and has passed out everytime. Is this how it makes SWIY feel through the day? SWIM has read through the forums about many of the benzos and effects. SWIM has done Klonopin also, but was doing it with friends but SWIM did feel great. SWIM just wants to be able to go out and not dwell on something all day. SWIM just feels alone on this feeling many times. Does any other SWIM have anxiety like this? SWIM will search for more answers. But SWIMs main question is SWIM wants a pill that will work. Does It seem like SWIM has something more then Anxiety. Or does everySwim get this feeling. SWIM just wants a benzo that works. Any help is appreciated
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09-03-2008, 22:37
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