Creative writing about methamphetamine addiction

[cyndi]

Dear meth,

Thank you so much for the good times in my life. I had such a wonderful enlightening experience when you are there. You were there for me when nobody else was since they think you are bad and am causing me to be a bad person. You make me a better person since you know I can have you day and night. I can't sleep because your company is so much better. You make all my pain go away since I can't feel it anymore, that is so much better than dealing with it. I don't care if my family is messed up because you are there to comfort me. My son is into you too, that is good, he can feel like I do. Oh my brother is in prison, hahaha what a loser, he had a lot of time with you too but you got him good when he killed a man. You are so wonderful for seeing that he is bad since he doesn't know how to use or make you resposibily. I spend so much time with you because you are the only thing in this world that loves me. Oh I know you have to teach me a lesson from time to time when I try to turn my back on you. My bad! I understand it when I am sick and need you to comfort me. Thank you for putting me in my place. Oh and my kids, they will take care of themselves, I have you after all. I don't even hardly remember their names or what they are doing like I even care. Is there food in the house? I don't know I am not hungry and don't care if anyone else is because you make me feel so complete. When anyone feels pain, you keep me from feeling it for them, and that is wonderful because I can't cry. I hate being sad you know. But gee you know and understand me so well. You don't judge me or call me a loser, I love you for that. People are so stupid to think you are bad. You make the users feel no pain and that is what counts. Oh you know I may end up without anyone but who cares, I will have you and I will do anything to have you. Money is no issue, I will find a way to keep you if it means stealing, lying, or even selling my body. You are worth it since you keep me from feeling pain. I can't feel anything anyway so I would have no regrets.

Love,
Me

I hope I didn't break a rule, but this is how swim feels when she is high and hopes that loved ones understand the addiction of this drug from a users standpoint, I know many are trying to understand why their child does this to them. If it seems pathetic to a user, that is good, come back and read this when you clean up. You will have to end up in the insanity to get it. I really hope mods don't remove this because it is a reality check. Peace and good luck to all in recovery. If the mods however feel they need to remove this post, it is ok as it can be harsh. But I feel young people and people trying to understand this drug need to know how a user feels.

Reputation Comments on this post:

	Powerful post, beautifully written. Thanks for sharing
	very thoght provocing

[insomnizombie]

i like it. i would have to agree with it being a very accurate description of the methamphetamine experience (or so i would imagine had i ever done such an illegal substance).

[titans58]

Good post Cindi. SWIM had her life wrecked from crank/meth after moving her and her husband and 3 kids to start a new life to Cali. Bought a log home ranch in the mountains and then found out they were in the middle of pots fields and crank labs. Once she and her husband got to know every1 and time past then it got to where meth and the greatest pot ever was just handed to them for free alot. Although she didnt have the typical addictive personallity, her husband did. They both recreationally, on weekends now and then had done cocain but she wasnt much into that but her husband sure was. He was actually doing it behind her back. But back on the ranch trying to start a business of trail horse riding, the meth started easly becoming a everyday accurence. They literally had times where they were up a full 5 days. Coming down off of that crank/meth made them have some of the awfullest fights. And usually she came out with scares and bruises from them. She was down to 98 lbs too. Literally they lost everything from this. The meth turned out to be her drug more then his though but if it wasnt so easlily gotten she wouldnt have done it. It continued for 2 years. Well they moved, she put her foot down to change there lives and he didnt want to. They seperated later and she is now happy with a new man of 15yrs and they have a beautiful daughter and the ex died from choking at (most popular) fast food resturant due to living on the streets and his throat was swollen from all the crack he was smoking. This was a man that had a very very high IQ, and had started up most of all the little lost distant sites that were popping up in the 80's. He was a computer , back in those days wiz.The children did suffer too. But today they are living full productive lifes due to the mom changing her life in the nic of time. I wanted to share SWIM's story because this is what those type of drugs can do. The childrn should never ever suffer and watching parents do this, and it does do that very thing. SWIM has a good open relationship with her older kids that lived through this and thy talk about the past often. Thats a good thing. Very theraputic.
Thanks for reading and i do hope maybe this story of SWIM can help someone.

Reputation Comments on this post:

	Straight up portrayal of what too easy availability of hot drugs can do to vulnerable personalities, wreaking the best o...
	Thanks for sharing, your story is inspiring.