The Beast - you will never get Red Rock again

The Beast

Hello old friend,

I've come to visit you once again. I love to see you sufer mentally, spiritually, and socially. I want to make you restless so you can never relax. I want you to be jumpy, nervous and anxious. I want to make you agitated and irritable so everything and everybody makes you uncomfortable.I want you to be confused and depressed, so that you can't think clearly and positively. I want to make you hate everything and everybody, especially yourself. I want you to feel guilty and remorseful for the things you have done in the past, that you will never be able to let go of. I want to make...

well SWIM just wanted to post this so he can see his progress that he is making in recovery and also just to get his feelings out

he could use some good heroin right about now....dunno why but SWIM is just craving that rush that he gets from when he shoots up heroin

SWIM just actually got triggered by reading a post here on DF but luckily, doesn't have any money to spend on H or he would be gone.

Also, SWIM is planning on going and seeing the Wailers tomorrow night and hopes that he can stay clean throughout the show. He is going with this girl that supports him fully in his recovery so hopefully that will help him stay clean.

Not a whole...

Swim was just thinking today about the ups and downs he has had during his short but still the longest time ever for him in recovery. He has 5 1/2 months clean now from his drug of choice heroin and the past couple of weeks, life has been so great! Making new friends, earning trust and respect back, feeling mentally and physcially better, etc.

However, just today, for some weird reason, he has been really irritable and just not in a good mood. He's not even sure why he's having me write this other than this community on DF has helped him so much in his recovery. He has tried telling himself that recovery and life itself has its ups and downs but its not making him feel any better....

Set: No expectations, tired but in a good mood.

Setting: Initially indoors, later outdoors

Dosage: 24 mg of 2C-T-2 spaced out over a 30 minute period.

T+0: First 8 mg pill swallowed with some orange juice.

T+15: Second ..

T+30: .. Third and last.


SWIM's first experience with this material had been kind of a disappointment, took 16 mg and had lots of unpleasant physical side effect with little psychedelic effect. SWIM had much lower expectations this time, as he had not even planned to trip. But since he was in a good mood, he thought it wouldn't be such a bad idea.


SWIM decide...