Is love a dangerous addicting drug ?

[Micutzul]

Do you consider love to be a drug ? Not in the meaning that it is a chemical substance , but in the sense that it is something , which alters your state of mind and thus alters the normal ratio/neutral functioning of chemicals in your brain

Now ,in the regard of love being addicting , i think this is pretty obvious for everyone who has experienced .

What i think will be a very interesting debate is whether it is dangerous ?

I am going to express my opinion on the subject and it will seem radical , but it is my honest opinion .I bet not many people give this much thought , when they wish that they were in love , when they feel unloved , and when they notice they are falling in love .

I consider love to be the most dangerous drug/thing on earth .Love CAN kill you , and has killed many people : those who have commited suicide over losing a loved one , or the mutuality of the feeling .

Love withdrawal can ruin lives , can send you plummeting into a depression that you may never recover from . The horrible state of being depressed becuase of lack of love can cause problems in the health , job , social relationships areas , virtually in any area .

In specific regard to health , it can be very damaging , causing poor eating habits , even in it's positive " everything is going well form " , and especially in it's withdrawal . Not only poor eating habits , but raised levels of stress hormones which damage health , and a general state of lack of motivation , anger , depression , frustration , all of which have very negative effects on health , even if just on the immune system ( the most studied of it's effects ) .

Notice i have emphasised that it " CAN " . But , considering reality , it should be more like " WILL " . Because a very big percentage of love stories eventually end . Many of them end in not very pleasant terms , and many of them end just on one side , leaving at least one of the lovers in psychological suffering . This suffering will lead to all the effects that i've stated above . So love not only " CAN " but probably it "WILL " hurt you physically and psychologically .

Why is it the most dangerous ? Because everybody craves for it to a certain degree and most people actually look for it , they want to be in love . And even after negative experience with it , after a while they still look for it , they don't learn that it can hurt them , they just say : "well..it hurt me that time , in the future i hope it won't , i just wanna feel good by loving and being loved ". I think that's typical addict behaviour. Just replace " loving and being loved " with " shooting meth " in the above sentence and you'lle see where i'm going.

Oh , and just because it's natural , doesn't make it alright . For example , when you are extremely enraged it is natural to just start hitting the object(person ) of your rage very powerfully with intent to provoke damage , that's what Homo Sapiens's genetical predisposition tells you to do ( as a defense mechanism or as a way of asserting vital superiority/dominance) . But still , in our society , i think most people would admit that doing it is wrong .

[razorwiredildo]

I didn't read the entire post, but love, just like any drug, is a feeling caused by abnormal activities in your neurotransmitters.
The extreme passionate love is basically a surge of dopamine norepinephrine and some other stuff. (kind of like speed?)
Most other types are caused by oxytocin i believe.
but yeah, if you look at love and look at most drugs, they are very similar.

[Pino]

^^^ With such a nickname, swim can only conclude it is

It can potentially be dangerous. Not physically, he doesn't believe that. The bad eating habits won't kill you instantly. Some people eat everyday at MacDonalds. Or some don't eat at all. It takes a long time to actually die...

But mentally it can wreck one. If one falls into the hands of a skilled fraud, who uses love to manipulate people. It is a dangerous thing. One can end up with debts, which one is never able to pay back. It is not difficult to think up more examples.

[insert_username_here]

Wow, you certainly are a cynical one...

I think although you are right that Love can cause a lot of harm, I think it is necessary to live in a world full of love. Not having love for anything due to fear of hurt is just as bad if not worse than risking falling in love. You always run the risk of being hurt in a relationship but that majority of people will move on from rejection and start again.

Not only that, but the painful experiences in life are just as valuable as the good experiences. They build you as a person and define you. To try not to fall in love due to fear of getting hurt is going to limit your life experiences, and I believe while on this planet everyone should experience as much of everything they possibly can.

[Micutzul]

Originally Posted by Pino

^^^ With such a nickname, swim can only conclude it is

It can potentially be dangerous. Not physically, he doesn't believe that. The bad eating habits won't kill you instantly. Some people eat everyday at MacDonalds. Or some don't eat at all. It takes a long time to actually die...

But mentally it can wreck one. If one falls into the hands of a skilled fraud, who uses love to manipulate people. It is a dangerous thing. One can end up with debts, which one is never able to pay back. It is not difficult to think up more examples.

Well , it takes a long time to die , but being heavily depressed and barely touching food for many days in a row could cause an ulcer , for example , if other conditions are right . And being mentally hurt eventually hurts you physically too. ( Physical danger doesn't necesarily mean it kills you )

As for insert username here's post , you are right to a degree. Most of the times , the only thing worse than loving is not loving . But - experiencing as much of everything as possible , there i disagree , and i think you would too if you realised that the everything category includes EVERYTHING - rape , murder , jumping off cliffs , etc .

[Pino]

^^ Yes, that could happen. One could also die during sex. Also a possibility. Your heart is already beating faster, when in love. During sex it will beat even faster. With the 'right' condition, it will fail. Hopefully, this group of lucky ones isn't too great. I am not sure about that.

I'm maybe cynical (or realistic as I call my condition myself), but it is true love can hurt. I do see bad experiences are necessary. They make one stronger. They can help one differentiate between people and experiences. I really don't believe I should love as much people as possible. My love is an important thing for me. I value it high. I don't want to give that to everybody.

[Nature Boy]

Conditional love is something that comes out of the blue, lingers and eventually dies if not satisfied. When it dies you lose something that can never be regained. Whether this is advantageous or disadvantageous is entirely down to how you perceive it. Overcoming emotional anguish is beneficial but in managing to do this, do you lose part of your ability to love again?

[Micutzul]

Originally Posted by Nature Boy

Conditional love is something that comes out of the blue, lingers and eventually dies if not satisfied. When it dies you lose something that can never be regained. Whether this is advantageous or disadvantageous is entirely down to how you perceive it. Overcoming emotional anguish is beneficial but in managing to do this, do you lose part of your ability to love again?

In my opinion , everybody copes with emotional suffering differently . With love , some people just hope that maybe in another place , another time it will be better and some people raise defensive walls around theirs soul and try to repress their feelings so that they don't get hurt/humiliated again .

I would say these are the two general aproaches , with infinite variations .
Both aproaches have pro's and con's , but i feel the second is more difficult .

[insert_username_here]

Originally Posted by micutzul

But - experiencing as much of everything as possible , there i disagree , and i think you would too if you realised that the everything category includes EVERYTHING - rape , murder , jumping off cliffs , etc .

Obviously I wasn't referring to things that would result in harm coming to others, that's just taking what I said to the absolute extreme.

[Micutzul]

Originally Posted by insert_username_here

Obviously I wasn't referring to things that would result in harm coming to others, that's just taking what I said to the absolute extreme.

I don't think of it as the absolute extreme . But i would usually be very carefull when speaking of " everything " . Anyway , leaving technical matters aside , love has caused harm to others and deaths . People have killed for love , and have killed themselves for love . People have abandoned friends , hurt people they care about it and a lot of other harmfull things while under the blinding shroud of love . Why can't everybody seem to accept this with an open mind ? Maybe i'm just more cinical than the average . Maybe they don't want to see all the sides of love. It's possible . And of course , i could be wrong .But information about love is everywhere around us and most have experienced it .Draw your own conclusions .

[Kodi]

Then you add lust to the equation and things just get crazy and confusing.

[Pino]

Lust pops up, when your body is in love. Our minds and bodies seems to have conflicting definitions of what the rules of love has to be. My mind wants to bind to one, but my body to many. This conflict can be solved, the confusing be raised. But it is not a solution society is going to accept.

[Micutzul]

Originally Posted by Pino

Lust pops up, when your body is in love. Our minds and bodies seems to have conflicting definitions of what the rules of love has to be. My mind wants to bind to one, but my body to many. This conflict can be solved, the confusing be raised. But it is not a solution society is going to accept.

What solution are you talking about ?

Of course that any solution regarding the problems of love wouldn't be accepted . I started this post , knowing fully that many people are so wired into their believes about love , that nothing could even scratch the surface . It's not just their fault . Religion , society , family , popular art , movies ...almost everything has programmed them this way . Plus , they wouldn't want to see the truth . The truth regarding love is sad and many people wouldn't want to accept it .(notice my signature ). Sometimes it is so much easier to just live in an illusion.

[Pino]

For example one could have a intimate and deep relationship with another, but also have superficial sexual relationships with others. But many people (including myself) have the feeling their partner could fall in love with another and leave them. Of course when there is full trust and the relationship is strong enough, the latter wont happen. Of course it is possible to fall in love with someone -this can always happen, but sex can trigger it-. But it is possible to overcome it.

[Micutzul]

Originally Posted by Pino

For example one could have a intimate and deep relationship with another, but also have superficial sexual relationships with others. But many people (including myself) have the feeling their partner could fall in love with another and leave them. Of course when there is full trust and the relationship is strong enough, the latter wont happen. Of course it is possible to fall in love with someone -this can always happen, but sex can trigger it-. But it is possible to overcome it.

Well , what is practically called cheating won't be accepted any time soon in this traditionally monogamous society.

Besides , i don't think it would help . As long as people are not in control of their minds and soul , having superficial relationships with more people , would just increase the chances of things going wrong either with the deep and intimate relationship , or with these superficial relationshops . And , in my opinion , it is virtually impossible for average humans to exert control over their minds sould , to such a degree that they could control very strong feelings , such as intense love and intense hate . I believe some have succeeded , partially , but even those have spent their entire lives in meditation and strict mental training to achieve this .

So , honestly , i don't think there are any solutions , except maybe something in the lines of the movie Equilibrium ( i recommend it for an additional point of view on this matter ) . But that would be to radical in my opinion .