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  1. Impossible

    Born in Ireland in 1884, child prodigy William Thomson was enrolled in Glasgow University at the age of ten. He became an accomplished mathematician, astronomer, chemist, and physicist who made a significant contribution to the laying of the transatlantic cable in 1858. His distinguished scientific career was confirmed when he was elected to the Royal Society where he served as its president. He is also known as the First Baron Kelvin of Largs. William Thomson or Lord Kelvin, whichever you...
  2. Fantasizing about it

    Been fantasizing about relapsing pretty obsessively lately. I thought writing it down somewhere would help. I don't even know what I would do after I smoked meth. I fantasize more about the process than anything. Going to get the meth, buying the pipe, loading it, melting it down and watching the beautiful crack back. That is if I didn't get arrested during the deal for some reason. Or just get ripped off; which is pretty likely. I know this will pass and I just have to stay strong. I...
  3. Open Up

    Open that new calendar, turn the page, and begin your new year. Just as in opening the pages of a book, who really knows what the contents will contain? Just what does "open" really mean for us? What do we open? What does it include? Familiar phrases or words such as "eyes wide open", "keep an open mind", "stay open to new ideas" all qualify as good examples of the concept. When your eyes are wide open, you see more, possibly have a different insight into an old problem or situation. More...
  4. More Quotes!

    1. I would kill for a Nobel Peace Prize! 2. Always borrow money from pessimists.....they never expect it back. 3. Half the people you know are below average. 4. 99% of all lawyers give the rest a bad name. 5. 82.7% of all statistics are made up on the spot. 6. a conscious is what hurts when all of your other parts feel so good. 7. a clear conscious is a sign of a bad memory. 8. All those people who believe in psychkinesis raise my hand. 9. The early bird may get the worm, but the second...
  5. You've Got Mail

    So, I got a letter from my landlord today. He plans to put the place I've been renting on the market. Now I get to pack up my loads of books and try to find a place where they won't give me crap about having a dog. Yay.
  6. Parting for now, have a son, moving my core self my core beliefs to build on.

    actually that's all bullshit fuck that. fuck priorities, fuck people who will get in your way and I did literally the opposite of title to be fair because I needed a picture, and fuck trying and fuck effort but yes still meet him why not actually leave get out alive were most are dead. and by objectification financial motives which are not bullshit become only meaning left out of who gives your birth and to who you give birth and whoever is source of bullshit gone nothing, however fucked...
  7. The Geography of Addiction

    A river of morphine washed from poppy seeds; an ocean of wine. This is the geography of addiction; this is the map of loneliness.
  8. Did it long term stage.

    wrong post deleted wrong post
  9. Yin

    Plato's Cave--many of us here are probably familiar with the allegory of prisoners sitting in the darkness of a cave, shackled, watching mere shadows projected onto a wall. Dragged into the light of true knowledge, finally. I've read it many times for classes I've taken over the years, and one thought has always resounded in my head: give me the darkness. Give me the darkness, now and forever. Let the eternal night descend upon my troubled soul, or whatever it is I have that...
  10. Starvation

    I will tell you why I try to destroy myself, time and time again. It is because I am starving. Last week, I was wandering around the back of a swanky cookware store looking for a bottle of wine, and I overheard the conversation that a couple was having with the store's owner, an understated French lady. The woman was describing her jaunt to Africa, and the man was talking about jetting off to Europe to play with the Berlin Philharmonic, or the "Berlin Phil," as he called it. A hot...
  11. People are strange when you are stranger

    Dohhh... Some people can really find things to be upset about. Offcourse that I most likely will tell you to fuck off if you call me in the middle if the night sounding totally drunk and spun out of your mind, asking for my adress and saying that you have a suprise for me and that you are coming over.And now this person plays victim to the absolutelly terrible me.I guess, majority of people would act the same if they were in my place. Life just never stops to confuse me with its...
  12. Are Culture and Literature Inextricably Entwined?

    And can an author ever truly be endowed with the ability to "transcend his times”? A text that had no connection whatever with the culture in which it was germinated would be unintelligible — and, I suspect, impossible. Either we are to suppose that the author is some sort of seer who has direct insight into some (supra-cultural) eternal truth; or that his book is written in a culture not his own; or that he is completely aloof from his own culture. My father dismissed the first...
  13. Manic depression. Help me!

    I do not know what to write. I feel like I am going to have one of my mixed episodes again. It is like doing a lot of very crazy stuff ( Like in normal manic episode, just except that these things are really bad and you are doing them in endless anger and fustration allways comstantly judging yourself)that are harmful for others witch you really can not controll and every single minute of your existence wanting to die and constantly judging yourelve. Even in that constant while when you are...
  14. Struggling

    There was a time when i wasnt an addict and i was sober never worried about things and was generally happy with age and shit happening i became depressed and upset and angry alot i would panic and drugs helped i started abusing them and using daily benzos and opiates and sleeping pills got them from friends stole them from family, plugged snorted smoked swallowed anything i could get, i finally kind of got myself together and pretty much only use kratom now and mostly only at night. Come...
  15. Myown private wonderland

    Just one of those days when I want to stay permanently high for the rest of my life and never ever get clean again, when I prefer to stay in myown private wonderland and let the rest of the world leave me alone. Because I like the world this way much better.In the same time hating even idea of it. But world wants me to participate in it. I thought that I am doing better, but now I really doubt it. When I start, I just do not know how to stop and I want more, more, more.
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